He’s fucking locked me out.

[FuckingFreezing1]

Basically this. I’ve text him as I can’t get in, I’ve just finished work. He’s on a works Xmas party.

Said he was setting off at 8:45 and he’d be home for 9 so I said cool, take the key.

Now it’s 10pm and I’m sat in a fucking bus shelter because he’s locked me out and won’t come back with the keys, he’s out and apparently I’m unreasonable for asking him to come home to at least let me in.

I haven’t a clue what to do, it’s 4°, my street is poorly lit and this place doesn’t shut til 12. I can’t afford a lock change so that’s out of the question and my mums not in. So I literally have to just wait.

Not sure where the OP is but you can get on many London buses and not pay (I'm not condoning it btw). Failing that, can your mum transfer some funds into your account?

You’re right OP. It is not your fault. I hope you get into your home soon and I hope you find the strength to leave this utter twat.

What a turd!!

Is there a pub you could wait in or something?

you need to finish with him asap.

Let this be the final wake up call to leave this vile prick. This is not a loving relationship.

Is there a pub or late cafe/ takeaway you could wait in? Could you buzz a neighbour to at least get in the building?

Seriously need to leave and never look back after this

he knows you can’t get it, he knows he has the only key - it’s not like this is accidental he was aware and took the keys anyway because he didn’t want any inconvenience of being tied to the time you finished.

he knows you are stuck outside and he doesn’t care, he probably also knows you won’t do anything because he has worn you down he won’t even apologise - chances are he won’t be home for hours and it simply doesn’t bother him at all

Judgmental ............

People accept this behaviour as they probably have male apologists tell them well he isn’t THAT bad… Give me strength!

If a friend confided in you her tale of woe, what would you tell her?

You're isolated from friends and living with a childishman or an idiot.

Where do you want to be next Christmas? Start the process of making your new life.

Well that's something. Buzz a neighbour and get into the building at least.

Great, so you have funds. I would go to a supermarket, McDs, station or similar. At least get a hot drink and warm up.

It's not your fault but the consequences of remaining outside in the cold will be your fault.

Why don't you have your own keys? Time to get some new ones cut! What if someone lost that only key? 🤔

So what are you going to do about it?

Seriously, it sounds like a child's playground.
One key? Whether he lost a key or not, just get another key.

I sense there's a huge back story here and you're going to drip feed, when the bigger issue is that he's stayed out beyond 9pm.....

Right, so what are you going to do? There are a number of options - pick one and commit.

No, it’s not your fault.

But you ARE choosing to stay with someone whose behaviour shows how little he thinks of you.

You are staying with a man who hates you.

Oh so shut up!

I'm sure I've read this almost exact scenario before?

After 6 years of shit like this who’s to say I don’t hate myself.

You need to break up. Stop living like this.

Be single. Seriously, you'll be happier.

He said he would be home at 9, when OP got home from work so as to let her in with her keys. Dumbass has gotten caught up with the Xmas party and decided she can sit on the doorstep and wait for him, if she goes to get them he is going to throw a temper tantrum

Just go an get the key form him.

No WW3 if he can't even get into the house.

Go to a hotel, seriously. Use any credit card you may have if necessary. Then tomorrow leave him. This is ridiculous. He’s left you in a dangerous, not to mention uncomfortable, situation.

And if he would start “”WW3” if you turned up then he’s really not worth staying with.

Go to where his Christmas do is, get the key off him and get another cut in the morning. If you knew he lost the last spare key, you'd surely have got another one cut for yourself?

OP, some people have been massive twats here, your UP (as someone called upthread called him) the most.

I think there’s a few things here. You need a plan tonight - is there anywhere local you can go to keep warm for now? A bar nearby to just have single drink whilst you wait?

You are righteously furious and I think, from what you’ve been saying, been fed up with him for a while but what’s been stopping you kicking him to the kerb before now? Will he talk you around? What changes?

You need to push this anger into changing your life because if you forgive for any reason, it’s just going to happen again and again and each time it will be worse than before until you wonder how you went from this to wherever you end up.

I do feel for you, hoping you are keeping warm now and can keep up that fire to do something about the useless twat in the cold light of day.

If he cared for you at all, he would not be able to continue with his evening knowing you were stuck outside in the cold. I'd bet that if the shoe were on the other foot, he would be marching into the pub to get his key and wouldn't be outside freezing waiting for you to finish your evening. Can you alert a neighbour to let you in? So you can be safe?