To feel under pressure to get Botox or similar things

[TheDearReader]

Hi, wondering if anyone else feels like me. It seems everyone around me (I’m 30 all friends similar age or older) is having Botox or fillers or expensive facials every month. I live in quite an affluent area and take my toddler to local classes and it seems almost all of the mums have Botox, brow laminations and all sorts done. Now I know this is my own problem but it makes me feel not good enough and like I need to join the crowd and start getting something done but honestly I don’t have the money to do it so I won’t be it just makes me feel a bit old and ugly compared to them. Does anyone else feel a pressure to get Botox or expensive facials every month and it seems that’s what everyone around you is now doing?

OP uttered the trigger word for the worst kind of sneering you see on MN.

34??? It's hardly old!
I'm 57. Haven't had a thing done.
Sometimes I feel a little pressure but tbh, I have a good bone structure and my face still looks ok.

It really does look strange. It's common for humans to make themselves look strange for fashion. History is littered with examples! Foot binding, neck rings, lead makeup, massive wigs with boats in them, no eyebrows. It's a thing humans do, so there's no reason to feel badly about it. But it does look strange putting weird gel under the skin of your face, or turning your forehead off. Of course it does.

Me too. At 45 feel no pressure. People around me who have done it look like a mix of chipmunks and ducks and I wouldn't do it even if it was free.

Yes that’s in. These companies have realised there is a fortune to be made with life long customers. No matter how much you spend, you will keep ageing and so will keep buying.

I am on a Facebook page for a skin product and it breaks my heart to see young women on there obsessing about each tiny sign of ageing and asking how to eliminate it.

Ageing is not easy, and I can’t imagine how hard young women of today are going to find it when they inevitably do start to age, and they find the tens of thousands of pounds and dozens of products they have used have not stopped that. They are already primed to scrutinize their faces and be in battle against their face. They are going to find the rapid ageing of mid 40s onwards really tough.

There's a 34yr old on Instagram called Bambidoesbeauty who hasn't had any work done and she looks amazing

I mean at 34, most people should look amazing without "work", it's hardly old.

I do understand how you feel. I think if I was surrounded by people getting Botox/fillers/extensive eyebrow stuff I would feel under pressure or scruffy in comparison. I know there’s a trend for having work younger and younger but 30 is still very young for this kind of stuff and once you start that’s probably it, you’re on a treadmill.

Same here. I’m 63 I have forehead lines, my eyelids can be a bit droopy, my jawline a bit soft but my face itself is quite unlined. I don’t think I look bad.

😁

I’m 34 and no. I don’t like the way it looks on people so I don’t feel any pressure. I think having it done younger can make people look older too.

Don't do it! That look is going out of fashion fast.

Within 5 years you will look so much younger than them.

I get sick of this 'pressure' word for people who can't think for themselves

No i don't need to look fake and no I have never felt 'pressure' to do so

I’m in my fifties and wouldn’t dream of doing this. It always looks fake. I can’t get my head around people doing this in their thirties!! All women of my age who I know are beautiful in their unique way. I don’t personally know anyone who gets it done but I can see it around me and it looks awful, very unnatural.

Find other ways to boost self esteem OP and maybe look for other mums to hang out with?

I think there is pressure on women in some professions. And in young industries. But we need to resist it.

I am sorry you are feeling pressure. You do know so much on SM is largely fake right? And there’s no way you need Botox at 30. Maybe work on your self esteem? I bet you look great! I have no issue with Botox btw, it has its place as do other treatments and tweakments, in my view. Some people like it, some people seem to put others down for doing it. I do it, but I’m nearer 50 than 30, and I do it for myself not anyone else.

I’m in my 40s and feel no pressure at all. And l do take pride in my appearance.

l feel horrified by some of the results of botox and fillers when walking down the street though. Some look like extras from Thunderbirds.

Absolutely! I have no one in my real life who’s done this, thank God, and I don’t follow anyone on social media who has, as far as I can tell.

I sat opposite a staff member in a travel agents a few years ago whose lips were so swollen. They looked utterly ridiculous and I felt very sorry for her as it looked as though she was embarrassed. I had to use all my self control not to stare - they were so awful. That alone was enough to put me off ever contemplating having myself injected with filler.

Save your money for other things.

Well I’m 41 and had Botox and it’s flipping amazing! Highly recommend it in fact.

No. Aging is a privilege. Lip filler looks horrendous, other facial filler makes people look older in the long run. The only thing I would maybe consider would be microblading but that’s more because I am not gifted at doing make up.

Stay natural.you will age so much better

On lip filler: I have never seen lip filler that looks good. It's always obvious that it is filler.

Don't do it.

A lot of people also have no idea what they’re talking about. Botox is not supposed to be overtly obvious. It’s completely different to filler.

Yes. But some of us are philosophically opposed to that too. Especially at 23

I think it is a bit silly to start doing any work in your 30s. I did try Botox at 41 and didn't like it. Luckily it wears off after 3 months or so. I also wouldn't advocate fillers for wrinkles specifically. I do have a small volume of filler in my lips approximately once every 3 years. This is only to put back the natural volume which is lost through aging, not to blow up a fish pout. Other than that, I just try to take a good care of my skin and overall health.

I’d absolutely do it all myself if it actually looked good on people. It so doesn’t