To have walked out of my work Christmas party in favour of dining alone

[Namechangey23]

New employer..I don't know many people as yet. Works Christmas party on Oxford st. No real entertainment, no food (yet!) and dull dull small talk, which, to be honest, was never my strong suit. God it bored the absolute tits off me. So I've walked out at 7.30pm in favour of dinner alone in a nice Turkish restaurant. Sod wasting a child free night on that rubbish! Life's too bloody short! Should I have stayed to show willing, AIBU for leaving...or would you do the same? Yes I've seen the mistake in the title and no I can't change it.

Not going to lie I did feel a bit guilty, at first because it was out of character for me. But actually giving less shits is...sort of freeing. Most of us dance to the unwritten rules. Be a nice contrite grateful woman. I bet most men would have given it zero though after the door closed!

I think that's really rude of you and I know several managers who would definitely be pissed off. You've certainly marked your card and sent them a clear message about what you think of their hospitality. 7.30 isn't late, I think you should have made an effort with new colleagues or not attended in the first place.

You stayed an hour and a half. That’s perfectly reasonable in my book. You didn’t just walk in, chat for 5 minutes, and leave. (Though I’ve attended parties where I was sorely tempted to do just that!)

How long do the YABU people expect to stay at such events? Isn’t the point to put in an appearance and leave when you’re ready? It wasn’t a formal sit down dinner or an intimate gathering.

In the context of a drinks event of 50 people, staying for an hour and a half and leaving at 7.30 isn't rude, unreasonable or noteworthy.

It's after work hours and people can and do have perfectly valid reasons for leaving at 7.30. As an employer I wouldn't think anything of it.

What is bizarre is making a drama out of it with this self- congratulatory thread. The sneering about how dull everyone else was is unpleasant.

Still a bit rude not to mention she was leaving early and to be very ungrateful about being invited.

These things are generally more of a command, or at the very least an expectation, to attend. She spent an hour and a half of her own time, unpaid, no food in sight and 50 people at a bar with the odd bit of music, then departed. It's not like it was a long banqueting table where her absence would leave an obvious hole, and she didn't flounce out dramatically.

Good for her. Those saying she's smug, rude, arrogant etc - keep in mind she's venting here and not to her colleagues. Perfectly reasonable to leave quietly, have a meal elsewhere, and go home.

Wish I'd done that on many similar occasions!

You sound unbearable

Good on you - would have done the same!

Do you know these people? Maybe they are dull.

Literally came to say the same thing.

OP you sound obnoxiously proud of yourself for being utterly mannerless.

Surely you left tonight as you weren’t feeling well…which means that regretfully you probably won’t be feeling much better tomorrow? 🤔

Maybe they are; maybe the OP is. I still don't see the point of this thread. What's the OP expecting? (Well apart from the rather silly back slapping.

You’re an adult, do what you want. I’ve left places early without saying anything. Unless your colleagues are bitchy and two-faced they probably don’t care. You made the effort and showed up. Although I usually get a feel for things and know when I won’t have a good time so I wouldn’t have went in the first place. Bit risky making a thread about it too as you have no idea who could see it 🙈

Sounds lovely please drop the restaurant name!

I think you should have said you were leaving (to your manager or close colleague or the person responsible for organising) just so nobody thinks you've collapsed in the toilet or been abducted while having a cigarette. You don't need to give a complicated reason for leaving, just "Thanks for organising, nice to meet the team, got to go now". If you waited a bit longer, till more folk were drunk, then your departure would be less noticeable.

This whole thread is hysterical - so wildly judgmental!!

Why do I keep reading posts from people bragging about shitty rude behaviour? It's not something I'd be showing off about to be honest.

This thread has given me quite a few laughs.

I don't understand why the OP is being told she was rude. Context is everything. She works for a global company with 50+ people attending a drinks party not well organised regarding food, and it's doubtful anyone would have noticed she was gone when she's new in the company.

It'd be different if she worked in a small family company with 5-6 employees. Her leaving would have been rude in that case.

I think what has many posters reacting is her "I don't give a f**ck" attitude LOL.

It was just a stupid, boring party. It wasn’t water boarding or a 1930’s Germany refresher course, was it. They weren’t forcing you to watch torture films or xxx rated perverted sex films.
It was just one of many dumb boring office parties you’ll be asked to attend in your career.
Or - you could apply to work at that Turkish restaurant - they don’t have office parties, but they do have lots of dishes to wash.
Think it over.

Personally I couldn’t care less if you upped and left. Where I think you were thoroughly impolite is the fact you didn’t tell someone you were leaving if only to ensure you were safe rather than excuse yourself I will add (you’re an adult you don’t need to ask permission to leave). I’ve been to many Christmas parties and very few have actually been enjoyable. Loud music where you can’t hear the conversation, drunks, the office letch and the almost obligatory puker no thanks.

Really weird behaviour, to be honest. Rude too. Definitely not how I'd like to come across in a new job. I mean, I don't much like it either, but if you've committed to going then you should stay for a reasonable length of time, including the meal!

Why?

I know right. Adults arguing over Christmas party!

My sweet summer children, there are worse things to worry about in the world. If OP doesn't want to attend her works Christmas Party then it's okay. Let her be.

Maybe so op, but most people would still find just walking out without telling anybody extremely bloody rude, regardless of it was a man or woman.