Is this cheeky? Giving child a lift?

[Bubblegirly]

My DD aged 8 does a class every week and has for the last two years. Last week I ran into an old friend who I haven’t seen for around 3 years. She was bringing her DS for the first time. It was nice to catch up etc and we said see you next week.

ive just had a message asking if I can take and drop home her DS tomorrow as she is struggling to fit everything into her day. I’m like WTF? I only met DS last week for the first time. I’m going to say no but is this cheeky? It really feels it? It’s only his second week and I don’t want to set a precedent

The parents hadn't met for 3 years. I wouldn't call that "knowing the child"

So?

@Zone2NorthLondon you are the one making assumptions!Why are you attempting to write as if you are from the North, all your posts are hostile and unpleasant !So glad I never new you or anyone else,with your mentality when I was a Mum with primary aged children!

You’re glad you didn’t know a stranger whose posts you disagree with, when you had young children? Alright…
You don’t like my posts and apparently its a good thing we never met (clearly you fear it’d be detrimental to you) Quite the extrapolation
So reread my response to the quip that Londoners are mean spirited

Northern? Lived and worked up North so yes can comment on that and draw comparisons between N England and London

Some people on here are so weird. Why would you need to make up elaborate stories instead of just saying no.

Agree 💯

As a one off, I'd agree happily (assuming not a big detour)

If she asked a second time, I'd probably do it, and might text the water by asking a favour in return

Third time, I'd say No, or ask if they want to do a regular liftshare

Agree. Just say no and leave it at that
No is a complete sentence no need for convoluted responses

'No, sorry, that doesn't work for me.'
'Why not?'
'Because I don't want to do it.'

my very first post says: don't lie, don't make up stories, say "no i can't"

Personally i would make the offer i outlined above. We are all different, but the inability to say a clear "no" on here is staggering.

Only on mn is not agreeing to offer lifts tantamount to being an isolationist who broke society and social norms

mine was the same. And i had 2 other children.

And yet, i didn't forget their care. And it wasn't christmas.

Bloody hell, don't make excuses for shit parenting. At any point after the first hour of the panic, one of the parents could have thought "shit, we have a child"

You’re somewhat over invested. The neighbour has already agreed they acted in panic & haste

It depends. I find parenting includes a lot of giving and receiving favours, especially if you work full time. So I'd likely do it if I could, but if it was clear that it was expected regularly and was a one-way street, then I'd say no.

Just say no and you have other errands to do

Just say no OP. She obviously misjudged you. Clearly you’re someone who thinks this is a big deal.

I think the way the favour was raised would put my hackles up - nothing about being double booked or needing a car etc - just her own business.
I find journeys too and from activities are one of the best times for getting children to talk with you. I wouldn't want to regularly share that.

This is your best bet, or just say ‘no, sorry I can’t’ I’m all for helping out but people like take take take.

So weird and unnecessary.

It IS possible to say no in a normal, polite way.

Ha, exactly!

Only on mn is not giving a lift indicative of isolationism, and means you broke the village (and society)

A one off emergency or suggestion of a lift share would be ok but if she's "struggling to fit it into the day" that's likely to be the same every week i.e. It will quickly become your responsibility, adding a bit more time to the journey each week while CF gets some me time

Exactly, @honeylulu
As said I've no doubt most of us would help in a real emergency, but the usual person doing the lift being ill (for example) really may be a "one off", whereas this has "ongoing expectation" written all over it

We can all struggle to fit things into the day - I do it myself sometimes - but that doesn't make it someone else's problem to solve

Not sure who you're quoting but that is exactly the way I read it too.
This mum is going to struggle every week.

I'm not even sure I'd want to get involved in lift share again, unless they were in the same estate as me.
Someone asked me one day to lift share it was a PITB for me to do pick up, I was going about a mile in the wrong direction to collect their kids. It made a tight turnaround time for me even more stressful. I'm actually quite glad their kids dropped out of the activity.

Wow that is a lot of responses! I have not even commented yet and people are thinking I’m making such a big deal out of it! I only asked if it was cheeky? I would be going out my way a bit but I will do it for tomorrow but won’t going forward as I have other children that need ferrying round and don’t want to commit to anything going forward. There also won’t be chance for lift sharing as it is much more out the way for friend to pick up and drop off

Has she suggested it's regular, or just a one off?