Would you have had another child?

[Annabella92]

Or a couple more children if your circumstances were different?

What would you need in your life to have had more children?

For me, simply more money. Bigger house. I would have liked at least one more. Its OK, but it would have been nice.

I have 3.
I would not have had more even in different circumstances

In fact I might have stuck at 2.

(not because of my youngest, just because....simpler)

No. Not for all the money in the world. I have 2.

We have 3. Had we had unlimited money, enough to buy a 5 bed etc we'd have probably had 4.

So yeah, just purely money in our case. And time technically, but money buys time too if you can work P/T, outsource everything etc.

I have one, we got lucky and I conceived in my early 40s. I felt I was too old to try again and we also just felt happy to just have one. I suspect if I had conceived younger, we would have felt the same

I have two and a boy and a girl .

I adore them and I love / have loved the baby groups, the pram walks and the cuddles.

I find the constant neediness so draining and I’m stressed all the time ; I hate the broken nights and the mess and clutter and whinging and crying. The not being able to live a ‘normal’ existence - I mean I am normal but when I hear people chatting about strictly or Netflix and I can’t watch it I realise I’m so isolated in some ways.

But I do long for another. It won’t happen but I feel sad I won’t have another baby.

No, I have one. I would have one again. Finances weren’t an issue.

I only wanted 2 really, but I got more. I love them all of course but I only wanted 2. People may ask why did you have more, but the truth is that my DH at the time was a rapey sex pest.

I have 3. I did fall (intentionally) pregnant with a 4th, but had a miscarriage. I lost my confidence and we didn’t try again - I’ll always be a bit sad about the miscarriage (it’s actually around 10 years since the due date of that pregnancy now), but I think things turned out for the best. So no, I wouldn’t choose to have more, but I also wouldn’t send one back - I like having 3!

@weareallcats and @barbarahunter

i hope you are both in better places now ❤️

I have one. I would have loved more but I came off medication to tcc, during pg and 2 years of bf. It was extremely difficult. I’d hoped I could manage to have another while I was off it and tried for a short while but I just had to go back on it. I couldn’t cope with coming off it again plus now I have dd to think of and I’m getting too old now anyway so that’s that really.

No I have two. Even if I had a bigger house and more money I wouldn't want more. I feel two is right for us

I stuck at 2 but that's because I had a boy then a girl

I'd have gone for 3 if I'd had 2 girls or 2 boys

I have one and it's perfect. Nothing would persuade me to have another.

No but pregnancy no 2 was twins so I have 3 when we planned 2. I wouldn’t change it for the world but it’s expensive and demanding and hard to balance when everyone needs me at once (teen years are mentally exhausting to navigate - although I do love my house of young teens).

I tried to have three, broke my heart over it in fact and now seven years forward I’m entirely delighted I have two 🤣

I have one. I would like another.

My childcare costs are ~ £2k a month at the moment (no doubt another big January increase coming too), and if I have a second I’ll be looking at ~£4k a month for a year or two.

I’m not eligible for any childcare support bar the 15 hours at 3.

My mortgage is pretty big and likely to go up a lot when I remortgage next year.

Just all feels financially risky. I suppose I can wait longer but I suspect the moment will be gone and I won’t want to ‘start again’ by the time my first is at school (and I’ll be 40).

I wouldn’t have thought finances would be such a major consideration at my current income level, I hear similar from friends and colleagues however.

I would love a third, fourth, fifth and sixth. Unfortunately I can't due to hyperemesis gravidarum during pregnancy and then mental health after the baby arrives due to my underlying condition.

I have four and absolutely not.
If I had my time again, I wouldn't have any.
Of course I love them all with my whole heart but I find it extremely challenging and lonely

I would have at least one more. I only had one because unfortunately I didn't meet DH until I was nearly 40. We were lucky to even have one.

I am sad that we didn't meet a few years earlier, which I think might have given us enough time for a second.

I always thought I'd feel done after having 3, but I'd love a 4th and maybe a 5th, or at least I would have if all the stars aligned. I'd have to have had a different partner and not been sick and have a bigger house, in my ideal world I'm not sure how many kids I'd have, at least 4.

I have 2, would have liked another with my now husband (also has a dc) as the dc’s dad left me when for OW before they were less than a year old. I would’ve liked to have done the whole thing again with a supportive partner. But blended families are hard, ours has been really complex with SC for multiple reasons and we felt the 3 existing dc’s needed to take priority on our time and resources. I’m still a bit sad but I think it’s now more a biological pull.

I don’t know really. We had a hard time having our two with 5 miscarriages before our first which lost us several years so we’re pretty old and I had two complicated deliveries and it would be way too dangerous to have another.

I have 2. I would love to have had 3 but we won't. Various factors at play:
-my age (about to turn 40 and feeling it)
-husband not at all on board
-mental health issues/stress (2 is hard enough at times)
-physical health - would want to lose weight first
-not sure of impact on eldest child who already needs more of my time than I'm able to give

Two is lovely. But there is something about 3 that seems 'complete' to me. I guess that number's different for everyone.

I have 4. Definitely wouldn't have any more!

More money, a better village and a less lazy H, and I would have potentially had one more ( for two in total). Would still have been a big decision though.