AIBU to think it’s too soon to for the school to be diagnosis autism

[CourageTrouble]

I am writing this on behalf of my friend ( who knows ) I have a daughter with SEN needs EHCP etc but even I am struggling to understand exactly what’s going on with the school and friends DS.
We will call him George.

George is 4, summer born ( end of August ) started primary school September, previously went to private nursery from 9-6 4 days a week due to work commitments.
he was fine in nursery, no issues raised. Performed in the graduation assembly fine etc ( relevant later on ) development checks were all normal during toddler years etc

with in the first week of starting school mum was called in because they said he wasn’t where the curriculum needed him to be and didn’t have focus.
he struggled to settle in the mornings, they asked her to drop him off late and pick him up early ( 15 minutes either way )
by the end of the second week they told her that they were removing him from class and putting him in with the nursery kids and then sent her leaflets via email about parenting and autism.
they then called her in a few times to discuss putting him on the Sen register.
last week they called her in to tell her that he wasn’t going to be included in the nativity plays and to keep him at home for the 2 days as he will get nothing from it and won’t conform and other parents will be there.
today they have phoned her to say that they can no longer have him in the afternoons and can only attend the morning.

his only been at school 11 weeks and she is beside her self not understanding what’s going wrong.
when she asks they say his too far behind the curriculum and doesn’t focus.
they talk about him like he 100 percent had autism - she doesn’t mind of course if he does but she is worried that they have come to this conclusion too fast without giving him a chance to settle.

I would seriously be looking at moving school. This sounds appalling!

Are they trying to get her to defer him because he's summer born and maybe still acts very young compared to the rest of the class?

In regard to exclusion there's no legal requirement for children to be in school until the term after their fifth birthday so it's a tricky one, he doesn't have a legal entitlement to ft. Lots and lots of parents defer summer born children so they start reception the year after. It's a very good idea. Four is very young for the requirements of school. ASD can't be diagnosed by school only by an educational psychologist. Not sitting on the carpet, well that depends how long he's been asked to sit for, one minute per year is a good rule of thumb. He could have ASD but he could just be little, all the things you describe are perfectly ok if you are four. I think your friend needs to go in and see the teacher.

i can imagine how confused she must be. From what you’ve said they sound like they’re not communicating well at all. However I do think there must be more to it than she is understanding. Having worked in schools for a long time, what you have described is not unusual (the behaviour from the child I mean) and not just for new starters. It really does take a lot before a reduced timetable and mention of SEN registers.

She isn’t in denial and if he has any Sen needs then she will do what she has to do ( she has a severely disabled 3 year old ) which is more severe health needs. She is a great parent I think she is feeling very overwhelmed because there was never the issues before and all of a sudden have been thrown at her. Today’s timetable decision was literally a phone call, no meeting or anything.

No she cant
he has already started
a deferral is a formal process and it not automatic

if he is withdrawn now then he would risk needing to find a new school and risk having to go straight into year -

It’s not true as parents the legal age to send your child to school is the term after their 5th birthday but legally they are entitled to a full time education from the term after their 4th birthday

Withdraw him from school and put him back into nursery. There is still time to find a new setting and apply for reception for next September. He may well be an entirely different child in a few months time with age on his side.

And there is still time in this application cycle to withdraw and apply for a deferred entry.

www.gov.uk/government/publications/summer-born-children-school-admission/summer-born-children-starting-school-advice-for-parents

Well, I would seriously encourage your friend to try a different school.

”not where he needs to be” raises serious red flags for me.
Why does he “need” to be anywhere? Good teachers should meet the children where they are at, and go at the child's pace. Not expect the children to be keeping pace with the teacher and excluding the ones who can’t!
Seriously, I work in education and it sounds like the ethos in this school is more about what makes the teachers’ lives easier than what is in the best interests of the individual child. I would jump ship right away and not look back.

He has the right to a full time education. I’m appalled by this. She needs to refuse the illegal exclusion. She needs to school to put everything they’ve said in the phone call in writing (for evidence). She needs to demand a meeting to find out what strategies have been put in place to meet his needs. But at no point can they declare he can’t come in for the school play, can’t be involved in the school play and can’t do afternoons. That’s insane. Tell the school to put it all in writing- I’d be amazed if they did. The local authority inclusion team would be horrified.

deferred entry is not automatic
read the guidance I have posted

I keep saying this
I wrote her an email and she sent it regarding the school play situation. They did not reply via email, they rang her and said “ we are not excluding him but it will not benefit him to be apart of it “

And by your own guidance parents should speak to the local authority to apply for a deferral which is what I am recommending. The child is not 5 so doesn't legally have to be in school yet and the deadline for applications for next September aren't yet. She has time to make enquiries and apply.

If in England, she can contact her local Sendiass for advice. Google IASS and her LA name. She should also push for a Sen support plan. School can get EP, SALT etc to come and assess. IPSEA is a good website for more into. It’s called the graduated approach. While she could make a parental request for an EHC needs assessment, there isn’t much evidence. And the same can be said for a part time timetable: they are unlawful, and should be time limited with specific target identified.

importantly, if she has any niggling SEND concerns, get school to refer him, waiting lists are long. Although coping well at nursery, there can be difficulties at primary - bigger class sizes and less small group support, harder work.

Or maybe, just maybe, the child isn’t coping, the school isn’t coping, the rest of the class is suffering disruption and the child would benefit from a reduced timetable…

How can there be enough evidence to exclude him but not to help him?

the world has gone mad

It is not my guidance and that isnt what it says
the admission authority decide but the child has already been admitted

The LA is not necessarily the admission authority

This school are penalising this child for being 4, it's disgraceful.

He absolutely does have the right to a full time education as per the school admissions code. That entitlement is from the start of the September term after he turns four.

This is really, really bad practice from the school. I’d be having very firm words especially about the nativity. That’s just rubbish. If they believe her child has SEN or autism and they are doing this, well, that could potentially be disability discrimination. It sounds like they don’t have a basic grip on what is legal.

The child can be withdrawn and they can start the cycle again.

Tbf that, other than behind the curriculum, describes ds in year R. He was diagnosed with adhd and asd aged 13, and I wish I had pushed the schools and not listened when they said "he's a summer boy, just needs a bit of time and he'll be fine".

I would advise your friend to get in touch with the LA and defer his place. Possibly to a new school. He doesn't have to be in school yet and it doesn't sound like it's going well. Yes, it's not automatic but I think your friend could make a good case. He would with a deferred place begin in reception in September 2025.

She should point out if they think he has Sen and are excluding him from activities and school because of his needs it's discrimination.