Neighbours should not look into my home?

[Happygonotlucky]

We have huge glass doors in our back extension. We got them to allow us to enjoy the view. My husband thinks we should have curtains as our neighbours can see into our kitchen/diner/family room, especially when lights are on in the evening, when they are outside in their gardens. He feels exposed/vulnerable to being watched.

I feel our neighbours should do the right thing and not stare into our home. Am I being unreasonable to not buy curtains for privacy and expect neighbours to do the right thing. One of our neighbours is a bit unfriendly and from time to time we have seen her staring and analysing our house.

Do you have curtain treatment for your glass doors? Do you care if your neighbours can see you living your life in your home? Do you think they should just do the right and polite thing and not stare and analyse what you have and are doing?

I'd actually be interested to know why you wouldn't have any window coverings if you know that people are actively looking in. Of course it could be that people simply don't care if others see their decor or could watch them go about their life in their house, to me it seems so strange, but I am a very private person. I'm sure there must be a few people who do indeed enjoy the thought of others seeing right into their house, I didn't suggest at all that applied in general.

If it's only one side, I'd get 'something' along that side. I hate window dressings, I love as much natural light as possible. So I wouldn't be doing all 3 sides. I'd opt for some neat & tidy blinds or shutters. There are some great privacy blinds on the market.

it doesn't matter whether they shoul or shouldn't or whether you should have built a glass extension & not minimised the impact on your neighbours (hypocritically I'd be pissed off that your light was ruining the night sky for me).

All that matters is that it's annoying you & you can't change them, but you can fix it!! My DH would know that curtains were never going to happen in a glass extension!! But we'd have discussed it knowing his hatred of being in a goldfish bowl - and decided on a way forward.

Can you block their view?

Taller fence? Plants?

To be fair, you were bonkers to do this

Sounds like you have created a situation in which they can’t avoid over looking you. You need to give yourself more privacy. Blinds rather than something invasive like bamboo

I have 2 big windows at the front of our house, we have no neighbours that look in on us and fields directly in front of us, we still have blinds and curtains at night, anyone can walk past us if they want to. You know you have neighbours who can look in on you so why is this even a question you should 100% have curtains your husband is right.

Why not have a high fence, then they couldn't look in.

It clearly bothers you that your neighbour is looking in. But there's absolutely nothing that you can do about that apart from putting up some kind of screen, whether that's window covering, plants etc. You cannot alter the neighbour's behaviour eg you can't go round to your neighbour and tell them in which direction their eyes should look. If he wants to stare in, yes that's strange but the onus is on you to do something to prevent it. As far as I'm aware it isn't illegal to look into your neighbour's glass walled extension.

EDIT I seem to have detached from the post I was replying to, now I cant see who asked if I at least have bedroom curtains

Nope. Theres one house that has a window on the side of their house (it's on a road off my road) being a side window (and they also have back garden facing windows) they can not look or keep their curtains shut. They'll only look once🤪. In 14 years they've never said it's an issue 🤷🏻‍♀️

then there's a large gap directly in front of my window, diagonally there's a set of 3 houses. They can probably see in (2/3 anyway) but they'd have to deliberately try to look in ... and as I say, something you wouldn't bother to do again 🤣. They can close their own curtains when it gets dark if it's an issue & as I say, no one has mentioned it over the 14 years I've been here.🤷🏻‍♀️

I like the natural light streaming in, in the mornings, my body clock copes better.

the only thing that annoys me, is that when they changed the street lights from traditional orange light to white LED they changed the spacing, plonking one right outside my window. Extra annoying as there's nothing the other side of my windows for a couple of hundred meters 🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️

... but the quote for the curtains and voile is £5k.

Perhaps the answer is a taller fence

Did you not think about the privacy issue when you were planning your extension and factor in the cost of curtains? Could you sew your own curtains, saves a fortune?

Presumably for all 3 sides and an expensive choice of fabric no doubt.

get a quite just for their side & look at your fabric choices and make it more like a wall (flatter) than a theatre (excess fabric)

There is a great place in London, the Curtain Factory Outlet who do great curtains etc at about 1/4 of the price that John Lewis etc quote. We got a ridiculous quote for John Lewis for our curtians then paid about £400 with these guys.

😂

what view are you getting in the evening? It’s dark.
just get some curtains

I absolutely hate it when it’s dark outside and the curtains aren’t closed. It feels unfriendly and weird. As soon as it gets dark out, close curtains. Or blinds or whatever.
I wouldn’t call them “window dressings” though - makes me think of flouncy pelmets etc! Just a nice simple curtain that pulls to the side.

I probably wouldn’t bother with voiles though - like you, I want to see out properly when it’s light. Neighbours shouldn’t nosy into your house but that is irrelevant - if they are doing, there’s nothing you can do to stop them really. It’s not that easy to see in if it’s light outside - they were probably peering so much because they couldn’t see in well. Rude of them but you can’t stop someone being rude.

So you know that people will look.

If only there were multiple options for privacy

I agree. One of our neighbours tore down the house when they bought it and built a modern house with huge glass windows all the way round. They’re 1/4 if a mile away (we’re rural) up
the hill. For the first year they didn’t have curtains anywhere downstairs. We used to call it The Big Brother House. You couldn’t help but see everything they were doing, they were illuminated like a tv. Thankfully they got themselves curtains!

If you build yourself a goldfish bowl people will look in. Fact. Deal with it or get curtains.

Well you will insist on living in a goldfish bowl.

Just get some roller blinds for at night and continue with nothing during the day.

Why does your husband believe anything he does would be interesting to the neighbours?

What your Neighbours should do, and what they will do are 2 very different things.

You need curtains.

Oh God, somebody shoot me!!

Then your husband is being very precious.

Not for big ones it doesn't.

So very touche but the phase here is "well they've seen you coming". 🤣🤣

Get to dunelm and make something yourself for a fraction of that.