To have expected more in life from working to reach this salary?

[grethrow]

I’m early forties and earn 75k. I know this isn’t huge money but it’s well above average salaries in the uk. I worked hard to get to this point (I’m not saying people who earn less don’t work hard).

I guess along the way I always thought I would be able to have a really comfortable life on this salary. I have one ds who is 11 but his costs don’t really factor in much as his dad pays for most stuff (ds lives with me so dad pays a decent amount).

I assumed going on holiday would be easy but renting a cottage in Devon in a nice area for a week is around 1,500, then there’s travel costs and food etc when you’re there! Going abroad long haul is extortionate. I guess these things are just about doable for me but it’s not easy.

I am having a privileged whinge. I know that. But I do feel sometimes like maybe at 18 I shouldn’t have bothered. My parents had a similar income (taking into account inflation) and me and my brother both went to independent schools, grew up in a large home and parents had very nice cars. It wouldn’t be possible for me to go and buy a nice car outright. I know people have it much worse but I still feel cheated and like it is a slog for very little, fair of me to feel this? Do others feel this?

@SchoolDilemma17 are you actually reading my posts? I’ve literally just said not 300 a week

I don’t know how you can reduce a food shop if blueberries and raspberries etc are minimum 3 pounds each. That’s just what it costs?!

You buy cheaper fruit, buy frozen berries to add to yoghurt or make smoothies, not buy 10+ punnets of berries because an 11 year old likes them. My DS loves berries, and I’ll buy them weekly but balanced out with apples and bananas - he can’t just eat berries.

You must realise you have a pretty extravagant lifestyle day to day, which is why you’re not able to afford nicer, longer term projects.

You said you spend your 1k maintenance plus £200 on your son. That’s around £300 per week.

Your finances don't make sense.

£1100 mortgage
£300 car
£600 food
£500 bills

And then even with the £1200 on child related activities then you end up spending

£3700 total spend

But your income and child maintenance is about £5500

So you have £1900 a month left

Even take off another £400 for stuff and fun money, then that's £1500 a month left.

£18,000 a year to spend on holidays and other things.

Without even changing your existing expenditure at all.

okay lets break this down a bit then

outgoings
£1200 mortgage
£1000 bills and personal spends?
£220 car
£1200 spent entirely on sons hobbies/activities/clothes etc (!!)
£600 shopping
Total: £4220

incomings
£4500 earnings
£1000 maintenance

Total: £5500

You should have well over £12000 a year in disposable income and you haven't taken your child on holiday for 5 years because you think it costs too much??

I'm starting to think this post is completely fake.

@SchoolDilemma17 yes but not just on activities….!!

@sandyhappypeople you do realise 1k for ‘bills and personal spends’ is ridiculous? A haircut costs around 60 quid minimum! And winter heating bills sadly aren’t 100 quid a month. I’m not sure how you think dropping 3k on a holiday can happen with ease

So it’s £300 a week for a couple of activities, and five days of after-school clubs? At least it’ll be cheaper when he goes to high school. Maybe then you’ll be able to “afford” a holiday 🤣

@Jellycatspyjamas i think it’s pretty depressing that you want me to accept that fresh berries for my child is extravagant. What a state this country is.

Yeah I think she is a troll or has a spending problem.

how many berries can one person eat? Two punnets a day seems the norm here 🤦🏻‍♀️

You have the lifestyle, you are just fighting to prove you don’t. £1000 for bills, excl mortgage and car payments, is a luxury lifestyle. We’re 4 adults in a 4 bed detached with heating on most of the time, showers, laundry, council tax coming in well below £1000 - approx £400 for winter bills, £40 for water, £150 council tax - how can you be spending so much more for just two of you?

Go to Aldi!

@usernamealreadytaken im not sure how we have got into a discussion about my expenditure. I’ve simply said I shouldn’t have to budget to the extent that I do when on what is considered a high salary. I stand by that.

Please get real, your spending is out of control. Nobody needs fresh berries every day, ever heard of other fruit or frozen berries.

So either this is fake or you just have no concept at all of budgeting. Yes a haircut is £60 but only need four a year, so £20 a month.

Do you actually need want or need budgeting help.

Say for example
200 Council tax
200 energy
100 broadband and phone
50 water
50 mobile phone
100 insurance

That's 700 and then 100 a week for fun money, haircuts, going out etc and that's only £1100

So you really should have at least a thousand a month to save

Tell that to the OP 🤣 I can live fine on my income and my kids don’t eat £40 of fruit every week

@Dishwashersaurous no I don’t want budgeting help. I was expressing in my OP that money doesn’t go anywhere on a salary where you expect it to and that’s a bit shit. Which I stand by.

Of course every single person apart from billionaires have to budget. That's just life

What a state this country is in when spending £40 on berries isn’t seen as a comfortable and privileged lifestyle. How hard it must be, having to choose between fifteen punnets of fruit or an expensive haircut 🙄

@usernamealreadytaken ive never said that we don’t have enough! Just that it’s still difficult and I didn’t expect it to be on this income

Let’s be real - you are expecting a 6 figure lifestyle here, sneering at suggestions to rein it in, buy frozen fruit or have a budget holiday in Spain.

You don’t earn 6 figures, you need to adjust to the real world. I think you are quite detached from reality and that most people need to budget for holidays and extras.

You’re not budgeting though! £40 on berries, £60 on a haircut and £300 on after school activities is not budgeting.

Or get the wonky berries which are cheaper

Berries out of season are shit anyway so I only eat (especially strawberries) them in season
Otherwise it's frozen or this time of year bananas and British apples

Aldi wonky raspberries are about £1.79

I spend under £100 per week on groceries for two adults and a child which includes meat, fruit, veg and treats. I don’t scrimp. £130 for one adult and one child does seem a lot

Nah sorry OP - i call BS - you have far more than the average person and claim to not be able to go on holiday? You either have a secret spending problem or you are lying about your expenses/spending habits. Either way - you have a budgeting problem.