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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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6
CatalinaLoo · 22/11/2024 20:05

Ytcsghisn · 21/11/2024 07:25

A shot paper that all the lefties read?

Not surprising, most lefties practice hypocrisy. Say one thing and do the exact opposite.

Why make everything left vs right. Get a life.

the80sweregreat · 22/11/2024 20:07

Nothing surprises me about this scam , only that we all fell for it and it was Captain Tom who did the hard work.
If I were his daughter I'd hang my head in shame , but they probably think they haven't done anything wrong :(

ARealitycheck · 22/11/2024 20:11

Have a look at their charity accounts here:
https://register-of-charities.charitycommission.gov.uk/en/charity-search/-/charity-details/5161126/accounts-and-annual-returns

and the club nook company accounts here, along with all their other companies in her and hubby's name:
https://find-and-update.company-information.service.gov.uk/company/12571495

Looks like not only were they paying themselves a fortune, through their other companies they were letting property etc to the charity.

Bunch of charlatans.

Search the register of charities - prd-ds-register-of-charities.charitycommission.gov.uk

Charity details for THE CAPTAIN TOM FOUNDATION - Charity 1189808

https://register-of-charities.charitycommission.gov.uk/en/charity-search/-/charity-details/5161126/accounts-and-annual-returns

theotherplace · 22/11/2024 20:40

Sneezeless · 21/11/2024 06:00

Who would have thought it?

To me it was always obvious she was enjoying the attention

shehasglasses48 · 22/11/2024 21:05

Me

GreensAreGoodForYou · 22/11/2024 21:58

WHY is everyone only focused on her, not the husband Colin? Even in articles, HER name comes first, then his. He was in it just as much as she was, the only thing I can see where she's more involved is in the appearances on TV.

I think they're both despicable, but I also think the media is LOVING attacking a woman and highlighting her role in it while utterly ignoring this Colin bloke. Not a single photo of him anywhere either.

Darker · 22/11/2024 22:03

I agree. They are both culpable.

TheHangingGardensOfBasildon · 22/11/2024 22:25

RavenhairedRachel · 22/11/2024 19:38

I had a feeling from the beginning with her therefore I didn't donate to the charity as I don't to any big charity as I think the chief executives wages are too high. I always donate to local and small charities. Rescue centres etc. In the case of Hannah Ingram- Moore. When she saw his cause going viral she saw a way to profiteer and has totally tarnished her fathers name. He will be turning in his grave.

Even the initial £39m that went to NHS charities - I think a lot of people were in the mindset that it was actually going to the NHS itself, maybe to buy vaccines or similar.

At any rate, we'd like to think that 'NHS charities' would be the worthy type of which most people would approve (albeit ones that maybe should be funded centrally and not need to be charities at all) - but do we know that there weren't any controversial causes in there of the kind that most people would not normally choose to support?

A bit like with Children In Need, where they always show the videos of the most widely heartwarming and popular causes, but they also give a lot of money to numerous much more contentious ones that a great many folk would actively find disagreeable.

EvilsElsasPetSnowman · 22/11/2024 22:34

GreensAreGoodForYou · 22/11/2024 21:58

WHY is everyone only focused on her, not the husband Colin? Even in articles, HER name comes first, then his. He was in it just as much as she was, the only thing I can see where she's more involved is in the appearances on TV.

I think they're both despicable, but I also think the media is LOVING attacking a woman and highlighting her role in it while utterly ignoring this Colin bloke. Not a single photo of him anywhere either.

Because she’s the daughter probably

TheHangingGardensOfBasildon · 22/11/2024 22:45

GreensAreGoodForYou · 22/11/2024 21:58

WHY is everyone only focused on her, not the husband Colin? Even in articles, HER name comes first, then his. He was in it just as much as she was, the only thing I can see where she's more involved is in the appearances on TV.

I think they're both despicable, but I also think the media is LOVING attacking a woman and highlighting her role in it while utterly ignoring this Colin bloke. Not a single photo of him anywhere either.

I agree to an extent, but I think the fact that she is Tom's actual daughter (not just an in-law) and that she deliberately made herself the poster girl of it all (maybe because of being his actual daughter) is very pertinent.

I'd contrast it with Judith and Fergus Wilson - the extremely controversial and reportedly appalling landlords who, at one time, owned around 1,000 rental properties in Ashford - pretty much the town's whole rental stock; so if they wouldn't rent to you for any reason, you'd struggle to find anywhere to live.

They ran them along principles such as refusing tenants who were single mothers, foreigners, non-white and various other (sometimes bizarre) categories of circumstances.

I'd say they were both equally nasty, calculating pieces of work - in it together - but because Fergus was the one who did the interviews and seemed to be 'in charge' (probably owing to sexist assumptions, and his own overbearing personality), he got all of the media hatred, whilst there was barely a murmur against Judith.

Prometheus · 22/11/2024 22:50

I’m not sure why people are shocked that the money from the book didn’t go to charity. They never said it would. People just blithely assumed that anything with the badge of ‘Captain Tom’ would go to charity. More fool them.

GreensAreGoodForYou · 22/11/2024 22:54

TheHangingGardensOfBasildon · 22/11/2024 22:45

I agree to an extent, but I think the fact that she is Tom's actual daughter (not just an in-law) and that she deliberately made herself the poster girl of it all (maybe because of being his actual daughter) is very pertinent.

I'd contrast it with Judith and Fergus Wilson - the extremely controversial and reportedly appalling landlords who, at one time, owned around 1,000 rental properties in Ashford - pretty much the town's whole rental stock; so if they wouldn't rent to you for any reason, you'd struggle to find anywhere to live.

They ran them along principles such as refusing tenants who were single mothers, foreigners, non-white and various other (sometimes bizarre) categories of circumstances.

I'd say they were both equally nasty, calculating pieces of work - in it together - but because Fergus was the one who did the interviews and seemed to be 'in charge' (probably owing to sexist assumptions, and his own overbearing personality), he got all of the media hatred, whilst there was barely a murmur against Judith.

Edited

Yeah, maybe it’s just after watching the Martha Stewart documentary on Netflix that I feel like women are targeted more in these situations. It’s somehow so much worse when a woman/daughter could do this than a man. But you’re right, I think it is more heartless as his daughter and she does seem to have been the face of it all. Anyway, they’re both awful!

TheHangingGardensOfBasildon · 22/11/2024 22:55

Prometheus · 22/11/2024 22:50

I’m not sure why people are shocked that the money from the book didn’t go to charity. They never said it would. People just blithely assumed that anything with the badge of ‘Captain Tom’ would go to charity. More fool them.

Tom spoke very clearly about wanting the money from the book sales to go to charity.

And, from an honour point of view, the only real reason for all of the interest and all the money pouring in was because if the charity aspect. Without that, he was just another random everyday grandad, like you find on every street.

Lighteningstrikes · 22/11/2024 23:14

Quote from yesterday’s news: “my father would be so upset I’m going through this.”

No, he would be upset by your utter greed and stupidity.

Bunny65 · 23/11/2024 00:32

This ,may not be a popular view but I found the whole thing pretty pathetic from the start and I certainly wasn't inclined to donate money. Captain Tom may have been old but that doesn't mean he was stupid and he wasn't senile. I remember the daughter said at one point that he had meant them to benefit from the money and I think that is probably true. The autobiography was an absolute cringefest from what I remember seeing in the press. They couldn't have known what a money tree it was going to become and they made the most of it.

EvilsElsasPetSnowman · 23/11/2024 00:47

Bunny65 · 23/11/2024 00:32

This ,may not be a popular view but I found the whole thing pretty pathetic from the start and I certainly wasn't inclined to donate money. Captain Tom may have been old but that doesn't mean he was stupid and he wasn't senile. I remember the daughter said at one point that he had meant them to benefit from the money and I think that is probably true. The autobiography was an absolute cringefest from what I remember seeing in the press. They couldn't have known what a money tree it was going to become and they made the most of it.

I agree with you and posted in the other thread how weird and embarrassing I found the deifying of a run of the mill old man, and I how thought this at the time.

Theres an insinuation that very elderly people can’t be total arseholes. They can. They get to about 80 and are infantilised”. Given the crooked nature of Moore’s offspring and the dodgy dealings, rule breaking and over-egging the technically incorrect ‘captain’ thing, it’s not a total stretch to say he may have fallen into arsehole category.

I remember my grandad being in hospital aged 88 and a nurse saying to me “Aw isn’t he cute” 🙄 actually he’s a bit of a bastard so it’s a good job we all love him, but he will probably make a horrible comment to you. Won’t be so cute then.

EvilsElsasPetSnowman · 23/11/2024 00:49

Lighteningstrikes · 22/11/2024 23:14

Quote from yesterday’s news: “my father would be so upset I’m going through this.”

No, he would be upset by your utter greed and stupidity.

Im not so convinced. Nothing to suggest Moore want anything other than your common or garden old man (yes he’s a WW2 veteran but so were a lot of people his age but is a novelty because he had outlived so many) who probably approved his daughter becoming filthy rich off his name.

Joystir59 · 23/11/2024 05:49

I think you are a bit naive if you think he wasnt a cunning old goat

Joystir59 · 23/11/2024 06:00

Grooveisintheheartbaby · 21/11/2024 21:40

My gut feeling at the time was the daughter was using her dad to get attention and make money. I didn't give any money as I just thought it felt off. Poor old guy was being used.

Poor old guy my arse- he raised the grifter

supersop60 · 23/11/2024 06:55

Ytcsghisn · 21/11/2024 07:25

A shot paper that all the lefties read?

Not surprising, most lefties practice hypocrisy. Say one thing and do the exact opposite.

No, they don't.

Weedoormatnomore · 23/11/2024 07:01

What caption Tom did was fine as all that money went to an NHS charity to be shared out. Its the charity the daughter and her husband set up that was not right. I did report it to the charity commission after seeing first set of accounts they published. Think alot of people did too.

Pumpkincozynights · 23/11/2024 07:03

Their actions have done so much to damage charities.
I no longer give money to any of the major charities.
I have raised money for charities on the past and never taken a penny.

ChizzleMeNizzzle · 23/11/2024 08:45

roastiepotato · 21/11/2024 06:16

The sad thing is that Captain Tom's name is now linked to the whole scandal rather than his walking in his garden and getting money for ipads for dying patients and treats for nurses

Edited

Oh come on, who's to say he wasn't part of it all.

TheHangingGardensOfBasildon · 23/11/2024 08:53

Lighteningstrikes · 22/11/2024 23:14

Quote from yesterday’s news: “my father would be so upset I’m going through this.”

No, he would be upset by your utter greed and stupidity.

Hmm, interesting.

So this man who was apparently so passionate about raising money for charity wouldn't be so upset at the charity money being deliberately diverted away from charity; only that his daughter had been caught doing just that.

She really is the epitome of Main Character Syndrome, isn't she?

Darker · 23/11/2024 09:05

@Pumpkincozynights you are right that their actions have tarnished the reputation of the sector but I don’t follow your logic…

The money raised by the walk went directly to a big charity - NHS Charities Together. The subsequent scandal is nothing to do with them. The issue was how the charity his daughter set up was using money intended for charitable purposes, and her activities outside of that charity (e.g. letting people think proceeds from sales of the book was going to charity). The charity commission rules exist to stop people like this from setting up or running charities and in this case has done its job.

Her actions should make us more vigilant and aware but should not stop us from donating to charities that are doing good work.

And generally, I would say that buying goods (like a book) where a % ‘goes to charity’ is a poor way of giving. Those sorts of deals can raise funds and awareness of a cause so I’m not knocking these sorts of charity partnerships but they are often more about marketing and PR than charity.

Personally I think if you want to donate, choose a charity that is doing the work that you feel is important and trust them to use it wisely. If you want to help find a cure for cancer, or achieve world peace, donate to a big charity that knows what it’s doing. You are unlikely to be able to find a small, local charity with minimal overheads that can do that. On the other hand, if you want to help local people who are going hungry, you can donate to a local food bank. There is room and need for both.