If your Dh owned this coat, would you make it mysteriously ‘Disappear’

[Cantbearsedwiththosepeskyelves]

I hate it!

He has lots of lovely clothes, new coat this winter, but always pulls this horror out. A hillbilly, scruffy, donkey jacket.
I realise it’s up to him what he wants to wear and he’s a grown man and it would be wrong for it to mysteriously‘Disappear’

But…would you make this coat mysteriously disappear?

I did actually once 'disappear' a pair of very pale blue jeans that XH was fond of.

He'd bought them at around age 20, apparently, but was no longer the svelte young thing he used to be. He wore them to meet my friend for the first time- we were sitting at a cafe table and he walked in and essentially presented us with his crotch at eye level. The jeans were so tight that you could almost see the hairs on his balls.

Anyway. We moved in together and they stayed in his wardrobe most of the time. Occasionally he'd fish them out and wear them, showing them off to me "Look! These still fit!" while I politely murmured congratulations.

When we moved house again they accidentally got packed in one of the 'loft' boxes. He never asked about them, but they were still in the house if he wanted to go looking, so technically I'm not a Bad Person.

Now when I see a guy in a coat like this I'm gonna have to warn him "Mate, don't ask me how I know but your sheepskin is not safe around around your gf'...

He doesn't feel sentimental about it either. He just has hoarder tendencies. We have loads of things that belonged to his dad that he actually uses, many of which I hate and have put up with for years because he likes and uses them. But a coat that is far too small for him gathering dust in the back of a wardrobe when it could keep someone warm isn't one of them. I donated it to charity about ten years ago and he hasn't noticed and never will. His dad is alive and well. I am not controlling or abusive. I am a bit fed up of being compliant with his hoarder tendencies though.

I'd say it's a kindness!

I'm assuming it would have been OK for your dad to throw away your mum's swimsuit or bikini as well then, because he didn't like the way she looked in that?

Healthy relationship.

Yes, I know the OP meant for everyone to agree with her this to be light-hearted, but the double standards (altho sometimes amusingly written) are fucking shocking.

It’s this assumption that the woman is the best judge of fashion, or what looks best on her male partner. If there was any HINT of a man belittling, rolling their eyes, commenting or CHUCKING an item of the woman’s clothing, we’d all know what to expect -

LEAVE
THE
ABUSIVE
FUCKING
BASTARD!!!!!!!

Can you imagine if a man started a thread on a different forum saying how much he loathed an item in his partner’s wardrobe, even if it was light-hearted in tone? If it was discovered there would be an outcry against the sexist, controlling, woman-hating misogynist.

We may hate items our partners love - that’s not the point, it annoys me that this is something women feel justified bragging about when it would be a completely different scenario if a man did it. This is not equality.

Plus if a women tells a man what to wear she is mothering him and she has to do all the thinking and 'hlwhy can't he think for himself'

If she doesn't he still has to only wear what she approves of

Sure in a joking way I get the op but this places runs on double standards

I’d just tell him not to be seen with me outside the vicinity of our property😎

Spot on

a number of posters have described it as funny that they have done this, or that someone would. No one has explained to me what’s funny about it

It was likely similar to one dh had many years ago - a scruffy-looking, fashionably raggedy (at the time) sheepskin thing he’d bought very cheaply while on holiday in the Middle East. It did look ‘cool’ then, but it certainly did pong!

Dh once bought a god awful car coat.
He looked like Del Boy.
Fortunately, within a month he left it on a plane and I can only assume that the steward agreed the coat should be hidden away from decent people and binned it or a passenger with equally shit taste in coats took a liking to it.
Dh made enquiries and I was delighted when the coat wasn’t found.

Gosh some people are taking this far too seriously, the op clearly said I realise it’s up to him what he wants to wear and he’s a grown man and it would be wrong for it to mysteriously‘Disappear’.

Anyway OP, while as you know, you would BU to actually make it disappear, you're not BU to wish it would. Nor, imo is it unreasonable for you to call it a donkey jacket as it'd suit an ass.

Yep. MN is very serious and po-faced these days.

I would glare at it everytime it came out I suspect 😂

Most people I know think speedo trunks are too much especially when the man is well endowed.

I don't get why you and some other posters are going on how you are 😂

Oh, my Dad was quite happy to wear trendy board shorts after that so nobody had to look at his crotch.

😂

@Alltheunreadbooks it was also when speedo trunks were really out of fashion and the teenagers used to call any man wearing them Peter Stringfellow.

Anyway, my Dad has a sense of humour and was definitely not upset.

I have noticed one of DHs horrible holey shirts at the bottom of the laundry basket. I do the laundry so am just going to ignore it. Bet he won't notice.
Dont think it is abuse or makes me a Bad Person.

I would just tell him not to wear it if he was coming out with me and to save it for dog walking or whatever.
DH has no clue about clothes by his own admission and usually asks me for advice so I woudl certainly give it on that coat!

it's a sheepskin coat, not a donkey jacket 🤯

No it's his choice what he wears

That a nice coat?

“Donkey Jacket” 🤣 it’s not what I was expecting!

But you’re not wearing it are you?!
Imagine if your DH was thinking the exact same thing about something of yours that you treasure…how would you feel?

As a compromise, I would suggest that you get it dry cleaned.

It's a joke...

A man telling a woman what to wear and getting rid of her belongings and we'd all be screaming abuse...