To be annoyed at DMIL for putting a wet towel in the dustbin?

[FloralFantastic]

DS peed on the bathmat this evening - the in laws were kindly babysitting. When we got home we were told that DMIL had thrown away the bathmat - in the outside bin, drenched with both water and pee. Rubbish won't be collected for another week. I was livid at 1) the wastefulness as would have just washed in, and 2) why on earth she'd put it in wet, as whilst I'm not gonna eat my dinner from my outside bin I'd also rather not needlessly invite bacteria and mould to it. She said she put it in a bin bag if that helps.

DH is telling me I'm being needlessly irate and should 'just' be grateful for the babysitters - thoughts?!

Maybe she thought the bath mat wasn’t worth saving ? Was it very old/discoloured to begin with ? I wouldn’t make this a hill to die on, unless it was an incredibly expensive newish bath mat.

I'd be annoyed. It's not for other people to go making those kind of calls over your things. I actually would be worried about leaving her in charge in your house again if that's her reaction to a bit of water and wee. What else might she throw out rather than wash? His pants and underpants?

I wouldn't worry about it being wet in the bin though, just that she's getting rid of your stuff needlessly. I had a flatmate use my pillowcase to clean up a spill once and I was REALLY annoyed. It's just irritating when people do weird things with your stuff.

She is being unbelievably profligate in her actions.

You are also being silly. It's really not hard to fish something out of a bin, wash it and return it to use.

And you're also a grown up yourself now, and are not bound by your DMum's weird habits with regards to wet stuff. So I hope you overcome your revulsion

This is just not a big deal. At all.

Just wash it. All back to normal.

Are you looking for reasons to be annoyed?

The wet towel in the bin isn’t an issue (your outside bin is full of mound and bacteria), the throwing it away rather than washing it is an issue - completely unnecessary. I guess when you have little kids it happens a lot so you know it’s necessary to wash it but if you see it as a one off it’s a bigger deal and you lose perspective a bit.

Both you and she are over reacting. Yes, it's very silly of her to bin the bathmat, and I would be silently irritated by that, but just get it out and wash it. No need to make a drama out of it - presumably MIL will notice it's still there next time she babysits.

Have you see the price of bath mats?

Could become expensive baby sitting if she won’t deal with the idea of washing something a child has peed on. What else will she bin?

DesertGecko Do or did you bin all the clothes your dc peed on when they had a leaky nappy or explosive diarrhoea

I'm against waste too. But usually bathmats don't cost that much. Yabu.

Being irate is pointless and ungrateful. Just retrieve it from the bin and wash it. Odd to just throw it away but everyone is different and she might be equally horrified at you washing it.
However being upset that she put a wet towel in a bin because of bacteria is totally insane 😆 I mean. Where do you put nappies, sanitary towels, used wet wipes etc?? It's a bin. That is literally what it's for and I wouldn't never think twice about worrying about it being mouldy, that is really weird.

I’d just take it out and wash it. No damage done. Some people are very OTT about cleanliness, she clearly thought that you’d want it in the bin. She should have just left it by the washing machine in the bag.

I wouldn't be annoyed. I'd be appreciative they cleaned up.

If you want to keep the mat get it out of the bin.

I'd be interested to know how you would get rid of a pee/water soaked mat.

Eh? Do you dry towels before you wash them??

Just take it back out of the bin and put it on a hot wash.

Add a cap of dettol if you are really fussed about germs.

It’s an odd thing to have done. I would be annoyed, fish it out of the bin and wash. Then let the feelings wash over me too.

Take it out and wash it if you’re worried.

If she's generally a good sort you really need to let go of this. Did she take good care of your son? Did you have a good night out? its just a bath mat. She did what she thought best at the time. You might have done something differently but in the scheme of things it's not a biggy and im sure she wasn't trying to upset you.

I'd happily sacrifice a bathmat if I had a babysitter. I never get a break so I'd just be grateful for that.

Was your washing machine already doing a wash? Perhaps she thought you wouldn't want this in the machine or hanging around. Take it out of the bag and wash it. TBH your reaction to this being in your bin, in a bag would make me think you wouldn't want me to put this in your washing machine if I was her.

You assume wrong.
They go in the “food waste / compostables” bin. At least that’s what our council insists on.

In this scenario you go like this.

”oh no nevermind but thanks so much for clearing up MIL! I’ll probably just fish it out the bin and stick it in the wash”

Then do that.

You DON’T make someone who has done you a lovely babysitting favour, your husband’s mother, your FAMILY, feel bad for making a small mistake that doesn’t suit you.

I hope you didn’t show how irate you were as I’d tell you to shove your baby sitting requests next time.

I agree with this. People don't always do what we'd do but she wasn't being malicious.

It must have been expensive throwing away anything that got wee on it when she was bringing up kids. I think my house would be empty.

I don't even understand what there is to be even a little bit cross about If you want the mat get it out of the bin and wash it. If you don't, she's saved you the job of washing it.

Your MIL is ridiculous for throwing away a perfectly good bathmat just because it has a bit of wee on it.

Fish it out of the bin, wash it on a high temp, and get DH to talk to your MIL.

I would have laughed if she told me that she had chucked it in the bin. Then I would have taken it out, bunged it in the washing machine with some disinfectant and got on with things. No need for a drama from either of you!