Please tell me that I am being very oversensitive / paranoid - friends post on fb

[Hisaronu1234]

Ok so the reason I am writing on here is past experiences asking for advice/venting on this platform has always resulted in ‘tough love’ borderline nasty comments telling me to get over myself , and I naturally feel I need telling this about this throwaway social media post that I am 90% certain I am being overly sensitive about..

Cut a long story short, I rarely post on FB, but I have a super cute Christmassy/wintery themed photo of my darling dogs who I adore, and in fear of being extremely biased, they are quite possibly the most beautiful dogs you will ever set your eyes on ( 2 little white bichon Frise’) who pose for the camera like film stars, I have no children as of yet and they are unapologetically my world.

I came across this photo on my phone earlier and decided to post it as a new profile picture.

One of my old school/childhood/oldest friends, who I am not very close to now due to our lives taking very different paths ( she had 3 kids at a young age, married young, never really worked) , I’m more of a party girl/ holidays/ career (, but more of a work to live than a ‘career girl’) but we were quite close when we were kids, and know each other’s families well etc, have not necessarily fell out just kind of drifted apart, she would probably say I don’t bother with her , but I will argue it takes 2 to stay in touch and I did make efforts, (PS we are both 30).

Anyways, about an hour after I changed my profile pic, she then posts a selfie of her with her puppy who is a cutie, which is a lovely pic, however I couldn’t help but notice there was a status on the profile pic that read ‘seeing as we seem to be at the age of having pets as profile pics, ill start steady with this one’’

I cant help but feel it was a dig towards me, go on MN community do what you do best and tell me to get over myself/grow up ETC.

I don’t know, maybe it is, I’m guessing to think that she’s barely any face book friends hence why you think what she does is all about you?

FB has a lot to answer for.

Seems like a dig to me but I am the type of person that overthinks and reads into every little thing. I'd say if you're not really friendly and you believe she's taking a swipe at you then either hide her posts or unfriend.

In what way does it come across as a dig to you? She’s literally copying OP by uploading her pet to her profile pic.

It would be a dig if she put up a status saying ‘can’t believe I’m seeing people put up their pets as their profile pic… are we really at that age!’

I mean she said

ill start with mine.

I would take it that she’s the first one no?

No, she said I’ll start steady, as in it’s her first pic of her dog as a profile pic.

You didn't need to quote the whole OP!

Yabu. She was inspired by you not making a dig at you.
Lighten up.

She's jealous. Ignore her.

She's copying you and imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Ignore it, go about your day with your lovely dogs and feel smug that you started a trend.

t wasn't a dig - she was acknowledging your dogs pic, and joining in by showing you hers.

The 'reaching the age of pets as profile pics' just means 'we are old enough to have pets and post them' -but it's pretty throwaway, not any kind of 'dig'.

Why do you think that she would be making digs at you?

I'd agree.

If anything your post has triggered her to do something, not in a nasty way.

You are some overthinker!
She probably following what she perceives as a bit of a trend so if anything it's complementary.

Sounds like she wanted to “join in” by posting her own photo. There is no guarantee that she even saw your photo - loads of people have pets as their profile photo. Plus, if she thought it was a stupid trend then she wouldn’t have done it herself.

If you do think it was a dig at you and you’re not really friends anyway then just mute her and carry on. You don’t have to give your attention to things or people that annoy you

Yes. She's claiming to be the first ever person to have put a picture of their pet as their profile photo. Whereas actually, it's the OP that should get the credit in the Guiness Book of Records for being the first. 🙄

Or maybe she was referring to the fact that it's the first time she has posted a picture of her pet? Because, you know, that would make more sense.

In the nicest possible way, if you analyse things to the extent that you explain them, you're going to encounter things like this all the time.

It doesn't mean anything, try and put it out of your mind.

Just put 'cute pup.'
And perhaps you'll have a nice convo about dogs.

I agree! I also have a deceased pet as my profile picture, in my case it's because I don't want to be recognised but it's still a pet. Lots of people do. Your friend meant no harm by her quite innocuous remark.

If one of my friends did that, I'd think they were making a harmless joke. The fact that you don't says a lot about the confidence and trust you have in the friendship. Because with good friends that we trust, we don't jump to assume bad motives for little things like that. If I was you, I'd reflect on what is wrong that makes you mistrust her intentions. Is it because she has previous for being nasty? (Which means she isn't a friend) or are you prone to bring suspicious and overly sensitive? (Do you often suspect people of being nasty over minor things?)

Yeah, I'm not buying it. You could have just said you were on different journeys, you didn't need to go into such detail when it wasn't relevant to your post.

in her own post the OP has made a very blatant dig at her 'friend'

Has a klaxon call gone out somewhere? "Get over to Mumsnet, someone's actually asked to be told what's what! Yeah, let's tell her!"

It was obvious OP was filling in some background on how she used to be close with this friend, and now their lives have diverged. Might have been a bit superfluous but that's hardly a crime.

Neither is asking for a sense check on whether you've been a bit oversensitive. She hasn't had a go at her friend about it, she posted here instead. That's reasonable, not an excuse to try and assassinate her character.

She’s probably been inspired by your pic and posted one of her own.
I stopped using FB years ago due to a lot of one-upmanship, though.
The fact is that it is a breeding ground for copying as that’s what humans do.
In this case it seems pretty harmless, though.

Good grief. You'd have to have some chip on your shoulder to spin to that conclusion.

This

IT’S NOT A DIG OP

Really @Hisaronu1234 you need to get a life - get such a fun, lovely life that you don't obsess over someone else's passive-aggressive FB posts. Or get a life which involves service to others, to take you out of your overthinking. Do something - maybe which involves engaging your brain or body in something that is hard,, difficult, or challenging, so what someone else posts on FB is either fun or of no account other than interest.