To want to just avoid people as much as I can until I die now

[OptimismvsRealism]

Sure there are still some great people out there but most are awful stressful thick rude shovey mean argggg

Friends can still come to me but no outside

I would love this.

Couldn't agree more.

And it was how I largely lived my life until I was recently diagnosed with cancer.
I'm now surrounded by people. I let them in because I thought that's just what you did.
Relying on the larger community.

I was just saying to DD1 this afternoon that I'd kept it just between closest family.

I'm overwhelmed and frankly peeved with all the messages and people reaching out. However well intentioned.

I liked it much better when it was just DH and my two DDs.

Felt much safer.

Now I've let people in I'm just disappointed in them.
They get bored, have had their fill of my illness and go merrily on their way back to their perfect cancer free lives.

Gosh that felt better saying all of that!!! 😂

It might make you an outlier on this thread where people are talking about not being too keen on people but I doubt it makes you an outlier in the world in general or the rest of mumsnet.

People are just out to use you for their personal or financial gain. You really do have to advocate for yourself these days.

Yes. Me too. Don't understand the modern world/way of thinking.

I love my dog and my cats.

I will say that many disappoint me these days, more so since the pandemic. No doubt I disappoint them too.

Yes!!!!
And all the people that pretend to be you friends but can't even be arsed to acknowledge the question when you need a small favour
I'm just totally fed up & done with them all.
Can I downsize & run away to the seaside??? I can't but I currently look at Rightmove every single single day

MN is full of people, yet here you all are.

I'm surrounded by lovely people so I'm quite happy spending time with them. Maybe find nicer friends.......

Wow - I'm really surprised. Sure there are some awful people in the world but I'm always amazed that most people I come across in my life, I actually like. I try to start from a position of assuming I will like new people when I meet them and mostly I do. I love getting involved in new things and travelling the world and I think it's good for my mental health to realise that there are more lovely people in the world than there are horrible ones

To be fair, technically, MN is full of words on a screen. Quite different from actual people. It's why some people can handle online interaction much more than offline.

There are real people behind the words on a screen. Well except for the AI bots.

I like people anyway. Without people I'd be a bit sad.

I sometimes think I will be the last person to still be preferring offline interaction to online, newspapers to digital news, walking to driving....

Me too. Of course there are some arseholes but the (only) joy of menopause is that I am now assertive enough to tell the arseholes that they are being arseholes and not bother with them any more.

Most people are not arseholes. Most people are friendly and warm and nice to chat to. Most are not going to rob you or stab you.

However, you are on MN, where opening your front door is seen as an extremely bold move, if the caller has not texted in triplicate first. You do you. Just don't come back whingeing in however many years when your kids are grown and left home, and you suddenly realise you're on your own for most of the rest of your life.

No. If anything, we all need to get out more and see and interact with more people, not fewer. Yes, others can be annoying but we have to be more tolerant of differences and learn to understand people outside of our immediate social circle, otherwise we end up lonely, isolated, depressed and more open to extremism.

Yanbu.

I love the idea of people, but hate the reality. I'll tolerate the well-intentioned in small doses and try to reciprocate.

Cats are much, much nicer to be around.

Me too. Genuinely.

I have found my people. I wish I could take the few people I love and move away from the majority of others. At work I’m surrounded by egos or people seeking validation all the time, talking about themselves constantly. It’s exhausting. Many of my friends have started to compete with each other on who has the best life / most money so I want to ditch them too. Even out and about I find people unbearably loud and often awful / self-absorbed.

1982 or even 1992 would be fine by me.

I am so sorry about your diagnosis, @drivinmecrazy

I remember a weird dichotomy when DH was diagnosed with an aggressive cancer. About 80% of the well wishers are reading from a script, and that does produce a great feeling of loneliness. Especially because some were people of whom we had reason to expect more.

But then there are the others, and they aren’t always who you would expect them to be. IBTW DH has been fine so far since his initial course of treatment. I hope that your treatment and good people in your life will see you through this.

Ooof, insensitive, turning this into OP's issue in a world of conflict, Trump has been voted in for the second time, the economy is screwed, and people are becoming more and more grabby and superficial.

This thread makes me so sad. There are many many many wonderful people out there! Human connection is needed by us all!

Admittedly Of course, the people in power are loathsome and there are also a number of nobs out there. But so many wonderful people!

I work in a school so maybe I’m not seeing the breadth of society - but most teenagers are brilliant!

Tech for sure ! Covid . Mainly the state of the UK the government and the World in general

I have a few friends that I like to spend time with and I don’t mind bumping into them when out but there’s a lot of people I don’t want to see or bump into, I don’t tend to go out to places I’m likely to bump into them. I think I would get pretty lonely if I avoided everyone 😬

Hmmmm I've been accused of being a bot more than once on here.

I'm with the majority of yous, people free life for me.

I agree with you, but - you can choose how you live. Landlines still exist - I have a landline (which I use as mobile signal is rubbish where I am). I use a paper diary and a paper address book. Nothing stopping you walking to your local shop and buying a paper. I have several old friends who live a long way away with whom I exchange proper letters, which I save.

Not sure you can singlehandedly bring back paper savings books and phone boxes. But you can be selective re TV and prioritise living immediately - joining local groups, befriending neighbours, lots of in-person social activity, volunteering. Plenty of others out there doing it already.

I work in a people-heavy job and I am glad to leave them behind to go home. But without friends, neighbours, family, connection... what is the point? We're social animals and we kid ourselves if we think we can do without. I always find it funny watching 'simple living' YouTube channels, valuing introspection and solitude - when everything they do is designed for other people's likes.