Ruined the wedding dress i was going to send back

[whathaveidonehelp]

Oh mumsnetters I'm hoping you can help me.

I'm getting married soon, and ordered a selection of dresses from John Lewis.

One dress arrived in a box, and as soon as i got it out i could smell it had been worn (BO). Took it back to the store same day, spoke to the manager, refund organised. Stay with me...

Try on another dress (also from john lewis). Got my daughter to take a couple of photos but it wasn't right, and was too small. Walked through to the bedroom and to my horror there is dark make up on the chest. It's a cream shimmery fabric. I have absolutely no idea how that happened, but it must have been my fault as the photo DD took had no mark on the dress.

Not content with messing it up, in my panic i tried to blot it gently and made it worse.

I'm on a budget. We can't afford a big do, I'm happy with that but I've just thrown £500 down the toilet. Ive already taken one dress back saying it was soiled and asked them to make a note to ensure it's not attributed to me.

Is there anything i can?

in theory that's a great idea and I do always check the size guide against my measurements when ordering (no need to measure every time as I'm pretty consistent) but even on the size charts there is often a disclaimer saying measurements may vary.

And of course cuts vary - M&S say a size 10 is 87cm but clearly that can't be universal - a tight size 10 t shirt might measure 87cm but a size 10 over shirt or chunky knit might actually measure more because no one wants a skin tight Aran sweater!

if you could tell what clothes fitted you and suited your body shape you by reading the size chart /label, shops wouldn't need changing rooms.

T

To add to the helpful comments about buying a few dresses to try, we live rurally, and our nearest town centre is more or less empty. Given the choice i would love to visit a city to try on lots of dresses in the safety of a clean changing room, but for various reasons that is not an option.

You can’t be being serious?! In the shop you try them in (usually in a big size and gripped at the back if you’re smaller) - it’s effectively a display copy. It will likely sustain some damage but if you like one, you’ll order a new one which will arrive in pristine condition m. Meanwhile, the shop hasn’t lost any money because it can continue using the original dress as the one everyone tries on. If you buy them, damage them and send them back, the shop loses the money on that dress as it can’t be sold at full price.

I really don't care at all. OP sounds like a nice honest person who can't afford this mistake. JL already sent her one stinky item so they clearly don't take much care in their returns - I used to work there as a weekend job at uni and we'd take back any old shit on clothing returns, so it seems that hasn't changed. If they'll take it back more fool them. The mark up on these things is insane, one dress is not much to them and a huge amount to OP. But please, keep licking those boots.

Thank you @LuluBlakey1 , that's really helpful.

I’m not shopping couture so generally don’t make appointments to try clothes on.

I also prefer shopping online so do most of my trying on at home.

But you’re unusual if you do that with wedding dresses. They’re not exactly every day shopping

Clothes are made out of different fabric and from different factories and in different production runs. Although they are made to a spec there is a degree of tolerance. Using a tape measure against a spec will help you find the correct size, but does not guarantee it.

OP didn’t do anything wrong in how she chose to shop for her dress. It was an unlucky accident.

Yip was vagisil wash. It was over 12 years ago so seems to be a lot of different ones available now 🤣

These are wedding dresses from high street retailers like Monsoon or Phase 8. In wedding dress land these are cheap dresses. Our town centre now has none of these stores. Our nearer John Lewis sells electrical and houseware items, no clothing.

Options are few. and far between for shopping where i live.

Anyway this thread is getting derailed. Thank you to those who offered advice during a very upsetting time. It made a difference, i appreciate it x

It's just like taking multiple dresses into the changing room, surely?

Why was it cheeky? Ridiculous comment.

Claim on house contents insurance and just get rid of it?

My friend just had a quote to get her wedding dress cleaned, it was 😳😳

@whathaveidonehelp

I would just sell it as BN and make it known it has a bit of make up on from trying it on. The amount you'll 'lose' will be less than the cost of getting it cleaned.

Of course it's not cheeky to order multiple items! Many shops are online only so you can't go try them on. Many shops aren't accessible to people with disabilities either. Trying on at home and comparing choices may be the only option

Completely agree.

What an awful way to behave. Shameful.

You read the words 'on a budget' didn't you?! Bridal shops are hardly known for that!

DD’s wedding dress was altered extensively as the shop for some reason ordered one 2 sizes bigger. We worked with an amazing seamstress who carried out extensive alterations that cost a lot less than expected. Around £200 which was fit a bra inside, take it in, remove, shorten and replace the train, raise the waist etc. If you like the dress see about getting it altered. (And have a fabulous day).

For those suggesting ordering multiple dresses was cheeky (which it definitely was not!) or is not the same thing as trying on multiple dresses in a shop (it basically is!)

I'm assuming you've misunderstood. OP ordered high street dresses from John Lewis. These are not made to order dresses. They're off the rack standard wedding dresses. So I see no difference whatsoever to ordering multiple dresses to try on at home versus trying on the same dresses in store and only choosing one - or none!

I'd look and see if you have accidental damage cover within your home insurance that could cover it.

@whathaveidonehelp if you like the dress, get 2 or 3 quotes from well reviewed tailors to have the dress altered and a price for beading/detailing to be added. I hope you get it sorted and have a lovely wedding day ☺️

What’s the back of the dress?
Mine was too small but I loved it so dressmakers took out the back zip and replaced it with a lace up corset style back
i loved it and it wasn’t that expensive

friend of mine had similar but had two lace panels inserted on the side

if it’s only a little bit tight different underwear might be all you need !

How on earth is ordering multiple items cheeky? It’s no different to trying multiple things on in a fitting room.

Wait wait this sounds ridiculous but have you tried micellar water? I recently dropped foundation on my carpet and I poured some on and rubbed with a tissue and it came out!