Ruined the wedding dress i was going to send back

[whathaveidonehelp]

Oh mumsnetters I'm hoping you can help me.

I'm getting married soon, and ordered a selection of dresses from John Lewis.

One dress arrived in a box, and as soon as i got it out i could smell it had been worn (BO). Took it back to the store same day, spoke to the manager, refund organised. Stay with me...

Try on another dress (also from john lewis). Got my daughter to take a couple of photos but it wasn't right, and was too small. Walked through to the bedroom and to my horror there is dark make up on the chest. It's a cream shimmery fabric. I have absolutely no idea how that happened, but it must have been my fault as the photo DD took had no mark on the dress.

Not content with messing it up, in my panic i tried to blot it gently and made it worse.

I'm on a budget. We can't afford a big do, I'm happy with that but I've just thrown £500 down the toilet. Ive already taken one dress back saying it was soiled and asked them to make a note to ensure it's not attributed to me.

Is there anything i can?

Amex will refund the cost of the item if it gets damaged within 90 days of purchase so would very possibly refund for something like this.

I can’t work out why you think that JL or your credit card insurance are going to refund in this situation.
You bought a dress. You got a stain on the dress. That’s on you.
It’s rubbish but when trying on potential wedding dresses you should have been extra careful.

When I bought my wedding dress, I was warned against buying anything too small as it is incredibly difficult to take a dress out. They advise buying bigger and altering it to fit. (Just wanted to add this as I saw someone above saying that they make wedding dresses easy to take out)

Saying that, adding a corset back may help to make the bodice fit better.

For reference, my wedding dress alterations were just over £300.

How is it cheeky? How can you tell from a picture how something is going to look on you in real life?
I have ordered dresses I thought would suit me but didn't, are you saying I should just keep them?
They were from online retailers with perhaps one 'flagship' store in London and maybe another in Manchester: not a local shop where they may be in stock. But even so: most shops eg M&S have a much broader range of stock online than in store, and have 'online only' items, so what is your suggestion for these items? Or do you think if anything has been tried on it must be bought? Do you buy everything you try on in a shop?
Ridiculous, absolutely ridiculous.

Why cheeky? I would order various items to try on before deciding which I want to keep. Why is a wedding dress any different?

A lot of effort will have gone into making it
That's really dishonest and not a good omen for the wedding

How much do you think they buy in a £500 wedding dress? £80 tops - if they take it back they’ll sell it for more in the sale!

I do feel for you OP - a local seamstress will give you a decent quote - ring a few or ask for a recommendation.

DDs prom dress was shortened and made wider and the waist and she didn’t charge.

DD2 had her altered and cost £15 for cups and shortened at a different shop.

Ask around- you may get this up graded and be a unique dress.

let’s see !!

I got rid of Amex as it seemed like more and more UK stores wouldn't accept it...I wonder if that is why...

You ruined it, its yours that's the long and short of it.

No, most people make an appointment and try them on

Why was it cheeky? She maybe wanted a choice of dress and to try them on in the comfort of her own home.

Great. What if the colour is different irl or it just looks shit on? Or does everything suit you, you lucky thing?

I feel for you OP, what a quick expensive mistake.

i really wouldn’t bother going back to JL as they can’t do anything - they can’t accept it back into stock and they don’t have insurance for this sort of thing.(insurance for fire or floods etc in their shops). I used to work for them. It would be a wasted trip on your part.

im really glad you have the honesty not to try to return it and lie. To the other PP who said do it because JL can afford it, no they can’t they are on their knees. Have you read the news about closing stores and huge falling profits. They are not doing well in any shape or form (Waitrose sometimes is)

How is it any different from going into the physical shop and trying on multiple dresses in the changing rooms?

If you had no makeup on then it seems unlikely it came from you, how could it have? Perhaps it didn’t show in the pic due to the flash ? I had trousers from JL recently that I wore, put my hand in the pocket, and found a receipt for a restaurant! So someone had worn them and then returned them . I didn’t bother returning them as I had already worn then but it wasn’t great, surely they should check garments properly before sending them out again.
wedding dress sizing isn’t the same as regular sizing, they are smaller, so if you are a ten you will need at least a 12, ask JL for sizing advice.

Second this.

You could try dabbing at the stain with a cotton pad soaked in surgical spirit/rubbing alcohol. It evaporates really quickly. Try it on an old tshirt or something first.

As a splurge recently following weight loss, I ordered a very expensive cashmere cardigan online from a high street retailer. I was here when Evri delivered, and when I opened the parcel I realised that it had not only been worn (stank of perfume) but it had a large hole on the back/neck seam! I was absolutely fuming, and rang them immediately - but ended up having to keep the item as they wouldn't accept it was delivered like it. I was furious having to sew it up and wash it before I could wear it.

I will never order anything of value online again.

Not cheeky at all. I did the same. Got married on a budget so couldn't afford a fancy dress. Ordered 4 dresses from BHS and Debenhams as they didn't carry all the sizes in the stores (back when they had physical stores - and that's what I was told to do by the store employees). Tried them on at home and returned the ones that didn't fit or I didn't like.

I'm really glad I tried on mine in the shop, ditto my daughter 🙈

My daughter bought prom dresses from a charity shop, took them to be altered by a dressmaker, it wasn't expensive.

I have used hair mousse on a polyester dress and it removed makeup. I'd get it professionally cleaned and altered to fit or sell.

Thank you @Gonegirl7 x

Thank you to the others who have given some helpful tips, I'll look into them.

This has come at a rather difficult time, it would be nice if some people thought about what they are writing and the impact it may have. I'm an honest person who has made a stupid and very expensive mistake that will ultimately change what should have been a happy time dress shopping, to having to make something work. And yes, appreciate there are worse things to happen.

Scummy attitude.

why is it cheeky to want to try a wedding dress on and compare it to other dresses? I don’t find it cheeky at all. And I work in online retail.

Could you go to a wedding dress shop and ask for stain removal advice? My friend got a mark on her dress trying it on the week before her wedding - she had bought the dress. She took it to a local shop who she said were great. They said they had all kinds of things they could try and after looking at it suggested what they thought was the best solution and it removed the stain. They didn't even charge her. She couldn't believe all the possible solutions they had for different things. Might be worth a try. It was a risk I suppose- might have made it worse but it was right on the front on the bodice and not in a place it could be disguised.Her mum had said she would have added some embroidery if it had left a mark.

Just what I was going to write. Some people just want to be horrible for the sake of it. I guarantee every one of us has taken clothes into a changing room and tried them on, possibly buying none of them.

From google. Will makeup come out of a wedding dress?
Take it to the dry cleaners and tell them what the stain is ( was it oil based foundation, water based etc) don't try tricks to remove it yourself. Bridal fabric is delicate and not meant to be cleaned the same way that ready-to-wear is.Sep 13, 2023

That is maddening! Would you be willing to drop a hint as to the name of the nasty retailers? Happy to boycott in solidarity!