Would you let your 4yo choose whether to be vaccinated?

[Dramatic]

I'm talking about the flu vaccine not the infant vaccines.

Talking to a mum outside school this morning, our kids are both in reception and we were talking about them getting the flu vaccine at school in a couple of days. She then said her daughter won't be getting it because she asked her if she wanted it and her daughter said no. Is this a normal thing to do? I hadn't even thought to ask my daughter, surely they're far too young to understand the decision they're making? Would you put that choice on a child this young?

Sooner we have intelligence means testing for breeding the better.

I had a easy going 4 year old who responded well to that sort of thing. My nephew on that other hand would need to be told!

I didn't say she was dead-set against it or that anyone would strap her down.

I said she doesn't want to, but she still has to. If I didn't make her get it, she wouldn't. When I tell her I've made the appointment, she says she doesn't want to get it, and I say I know but you have to. Then we go get it. 🤷‍♀️

My point, which apparently was unclear, is that I don't let a child much older than 4 decide that for herself, so I wouldn't let a 4-year-old. I didn't let her refuse vaccines when she was 4. Or 5. Or 6, etc. It's never been her choice.

This.

At age 4 choices should be things like either a banana or an apple after dinner. Other than that adults need to take responsibility.

No! How could a four year old decide something like that? They need to start with questions such as Do you want a biscuit or a packet of crisps, or Do you want to wear your blue shoes or the red ones.

i didnt offer it as optional- but when school called and demanded i go down to assist in my son taking it-when he was absolutely refusing to it caused an issue. I went down. i couldnt help feel proud that age 7 he was on soap box arguing it was his body and he had the right to refuse.They werent quite as impressed. I explained the basis for why it was being promoted-and once accepted it was indeed his choice, he consented.

She can go in and say I don't want it and the doctor can't tell you either way.

4 year olds make decisions like "biscuit or apple", or "red or green".

They do NOT make decisions for something that they would not have the mental capacity to understand.

It would appear the mother probably hasn't got much mental capacity either...

No because a 4 year old doesn't have the ability to understand the science! A teenager would, but not a 4 year old.

No.

Lazy parenting. 4 is FAR too young to be deciding that kid of thing. She sounds a bit stoopid.

Maybe. But she wouldn't. I've raised two children to adulthood. None of them has ever done that, regardless of how much they've not wanted the vaccine. I don't expect she will either. Their annual checkups, dentist visits, orthodontist visits, etc., are not optional. They know that.

i despair. She is a fuckwit of the highest order

I'm just a tad worried you're even asking tbh, of course you don't. Consent, and refusal, have to be inforned, fully voluntary, and given by a person who has the mental capacity to make that decision.

Some people really are every kind of stupid, aren't they? How can a child of 4 possibly be able to make any kind of decision like that?

I wonder what that parent will do when her dd decides she doesn't want to go to school, go to bed on time, do her homework, eat any vegetables, or sit in a car seat with the straps done up?

Absolutely not

They don't have to have a needle at 4 if they are school age.

If they aren't at school it's a needle.

I had to take my DD for her vaccination at the GP due to when her birthday is. It was kind of confusing as they expected 4 year olds to be done at school but the oldest in the year don't attend school.

Fuck no!!! She's batshit!

Well of course if a four year old fully understands the possible consequences of , for example , getting measles and the possibility of the worst consequences, like blindness, or brain damage or death then of course they can choose.

Otherwise ………….

No. They don't understand the pros and cons.

Not good parenting at all.

Up until 18, surely you'd be with them, other than when they get vaccinations in school?

I don't think it was ever presented to any of mine as being optional!

I agree this is fundamentally lazy parenting. Or Mum protecting her own feelings. One is as bad as the other

Of course not! I've given the school permission to give my 4 year old the flu nasal spray because I believe it's in her best interests. It will be the first time she will be having a vaccination without me alongside her, so I'm not sure how she will respond. I'll explain to her the day before, and the morning of, something along the lines of what @Justwondering36 said, but with the emphasis on "this is what is happening" rather than it being a choice. However, I don't think the school can actually force the child to have it if they kick up a huge fuss on the day. If that happens, I think they might call the parents to ask them to come to the school, or perhaps the parents can take them to the GP instead if that happens. But no, it's not a choice at that age.