ExH brought his dog in my house without permission

[CfCfCftooMuch]

ExH just dropped off his dog in my house. For me to look after, even though i had said no to looking after him. The dc let Exh and dog in when i was out. They love that dog and of course had no knowledge of anything.

ExH is gone now for two weeks. Abroad. He just walked out and took off to the airport, leaving dog behind.

I've got two dc and two cats and work long hours. The cats have never spent a night/day alone in the house with this dog. He is kind and mellow, but a large breed. Size of a wolf.
I've contacted a dog shelter and might have to go to go through rspca.

Posting to tell someone. This is just one of many many ways he always finds a way to use me or control my life. I didn't want any of this. And now im left here calling shelters (which im asked to pay for), calling womens aid, calling rspca, figuring out how to do this without upsetting the dc, texting exH to sort out care if he doesn't want me to take this further, posting here for support, trying to figure out tomorrow with sorting out the kids, my work, other stuff, business meeting and my actual day job. Honestly?! Wtf!!!

Lie to ex, say he's bitten the cat and the shelters have said due to this dog is aggressive and needs putting to sleep and dog is now sat in the kennels on death row. Ask him if he wants his body to back to bury or ashes from the communal incinerator.

Really fuck up his holiday the absolute fucker doing this to you and your cats.

I'm not sure what you can really do besides struggle for 2 weeks if no shelters will take him in etc, but I'd put the fear of all dogs going to heaven in your ex ASAP.

God I am sorry OP but what a horrible manipulative cunt he sounds.

The dog may be destroyed after 7 days if you dump it in a shelter.

Is that fair on the dog ? it's not the dog's fault nor responsibility that your x h is a careless bastard.

will your children forgive you if dad's dog is dead as a result ?

Think about the welfare of the dog don't sell it or send it to a bloody randomer. He is a dick but the dog isn't. Have a word with our kids about letting him in so it doesn't happen again.

How infuriating that you have to deal with this.

Has he been abusive to you in the past ?

Firstly you need to think of your own safety first before doing anything rash that he can hold against you.

Can any of your friends or family take the dog ? Are your kids able to walk it ?

Kennels an option but they can be expensive and what is he doesn’t pay you back
A shelter will mean making the dog suffer

Awful he’s done this , what an absolute arsehole

Is he replying to any of your messages?

OP just as an aside - you shouldn't be asking a man you know is abusive and manipulative any favours at all - for eg looking after your cats.

He will just turn it into currency or a weapon.

You must grey rock him.

How is he getting away with not paying for the kids shoes?

Find the local shelter, WA your ex and say if he isn't back by the end of the day tomorrow, that's where the dog is going. Then follow through on it.

OP, do you have the dog's vaccination record? With it kennels are an option, without it no reputable kennels will accept the dog. Its a bit of 'decision tree' if you see what I mean

This is so abusive - like someone said to every human and to every animal involved. He is an absolute fucker.

Hope you are ok OP. You sound like you are trying hard in terrible circumstances. Like a pp said, if he has any social media presence I would absolutely use it to shame him publicly. "Is there anyone who can help foster this dog who was abandoned by Mr XY his owner"

This is a thread I'd like the daily mail to pick up.

Vets won't take it, it's not an ill animal.

If it's in a house without food and water the RSPCA WILL intervene, but ti leave an animal without food and water is criminally cruel and they would rightly prosecute.

If the dog has food and water, they deem that to be 'sufficient' {Only know this as many people including me tried to report a yard chained dog that was never ever allowed off his chain, year after year.

If the dog has food and water, and rudimentary shelter, that's all that{ legally }matters, according to RSPCA.

They cannot seize the animal.

If the dog was just dumped at a kennels or a dog sitter, they would need to inform the dog warden, who would probably come and collect it from them and take it to a contracted pound kennels. The difference would be the kennels / dog sitter in this scenario would not know where the dog came from so it would be legitimately a stray and therefore the dog warden's problem. The problem OP has is while her ex has done a shitty thing, the dog warden may not see it as abandoned per se since it is currently in a house with someone who knows it and could - albeit reluctantly and with difficulty - care for it, and the owner is known and intends to come back for it.

I think we may have the same ex just does what he likes regardless of what I say. Definitely not your responsibility. Why didn’t he just pay a dog sitter?!

I'm actually aghast at the horrible suggestions here, lie that the dog has bitten, dump it outside, put to sleep, leave locked in his house.
What so wrong with people? this is a living sentient being, why has the dog to suffer because his owner is a dick.
Vile vile people posting here.

Seriously? What's the dog done wrong?
Don't go to a shelter op. They might put the poor thing to sleep if you say it has been abandoned.

A post in the dog house section of MN will find Mumsnetters from your area or with connections to it, even if not in the UK, I'm sure! If you don't mind giving a general area.

Agree with Facebook request for help, and gofundme options.

Don't take it out on the dog please, appreciate it's annoying but not fair to abandon the dog

Tell him the dog is back in his house, you will take kids round to put food & water in. If he has a secure back garden, let it out to do its business, otherwise it will be home alone until he sorts something more suitable out. You would be providing the basics to keep it alive (food, water, shelter). When it wrecks his house & shits everywhere, that’s on him, you’ve warned him 🤷🏼‍♀️
Dont enter into any discussions or bartering, just repeat what you’ve done & it’s his problem to solve.

Dont risk keeping it at your house, the cats are likely to leave home & find somewhere else.

Get dog to his place, put water and food and leave ot to trash a place without walks.
Just pop every second day and refill food and water.
Yes, tje dog won't have the best time of his life but your ex needs a lesson.

Exactly this. What have the fireworks done to people. Some of you have a swinging brick instead of a heart. Preferable to get someone to stay at his house with it or kennels then bil him, yes he's a selfish prick but it isn't the dog's fault! Some people are so so awful to animals who've done nothing wrong. I think we're devolving as a species.

Do you really think that someone with so little care for his animal would bother with vaccinations? - Bet that poor dog hasn't been wormed or vaccinated in its life.

Most loving dog owners can't bear to leave their dog behind when they go on holiday.

Or, if they do, they pay for a good service, not dump it with an ex wife without food when she works all day long and has cats.

Right and what's your suggestion for thr OP? Should the cats suffer being locked in a room all day because of the dog? What should the dog do all day for 9 hours when OP is at work? Should IP run the risk of her house being trashed because the dog understandably gets bored? What about food .. Should OP feed the dog instead of her kids (she said she's got no money left at the moment)? Or should OP go into debt to feed the dog?
This is a shit show and OP is not at fault. No the poor dog is not either. But she's not obliged to care for it

You’re going to leave a dog for 2 weeks alone ?

I absolutely hate to say this but I think he has your over a barrel.

Your best option is to hope that a kennels will take him without payment up front or a card on file - but I don't know if that's how they operate.

Which country are you in ?