Pre-wedding email. Bit weird?

[bookworm8500]

Invited to a colleague's wedding evening do and had an email come through to all guests (unless it has just come to me 🤣). Maybe I've just hit the nail on the head 🤣

It states, amongst loads of other instructions, that,

'A small buffet will be provided. This is for all guests to enjoy, so please be considerate with your portion sizes'.

I've never seen anything like that before! AIBU to find that very weird to be on a pre-wedding email?!

Haha very weird. Obviously on a strict budget which is totally understandable! Make sure you have dinner at home before you go.

Pack a sandwich I think…

Hahaha. I'd imagine it's to stop everyone who normally goes 'oh I won't eat all day, save space for tonight!' ~ they've probably provided a normal amount of food and now worried they'll run out!

I’ve never seen it stated beforehand but I have been to various weddings/christenings where this really would have been beneficial as there are a handful of people who always go straight to the buffet when it opens and fill one or even sometimes multiple plates (one for savoury & one for sweet it seems usually, same culprits every time!) with more food than one person could reasonably eat, and you can always see half of it still sat on the plates on the table hours later not eaten or just picked at, meanwhile other people manage to get a handful of crisps and a cocktail sausage😂

I think they are warning you that the amount of food won’t be enough to count as a dinner it’s more a snack type.
I would have meal at home and pack something with me if you are not good with tolerating hunger.
Do they provide drinks or is it a bar type?

Think this is great idea! I’ve worked tons of functions where there is a light buffet provided,ie a few sandwiches each, small amount of salad etc. just a light bite, but the first people heap their plates up so there’s barely any left for anyone else!

That is a good heads up!

The phrase "light buffet" wouldn't register with most of my extended family, it would need spelling out!

Yes, it's a bar for the evening (pay for your own drinks).

Maybe there is a particular person they know who takes advantage of buffets and rather than single them out have taken the approach of emailing everyone. Wouldn't expect that to work though.

The people it is aimed at probably won't care and will load up their plates anyway

I've got images of everyone else being stingy and greedy bugger carrying on as he usually does.

I’m clearly cynical- this screamed ‘we haven’t told our venue about our evening guests so the buffet for 50 needs to stretch to 90’ to me.

Eat tea before you go 🤣 it’s actually better to have a warning. I used to work at pubs with wedding buffets. This sort mean if you are lucky a sandwich and then peanuts/ crisps you can buy from the bar.

Better than one wedding of very close family I attended. The food paid for by parents (my parents) was altered and different food came out. I got a sandwich and that was supposedly the sit down wedding breakfast I was so hungry 😂😂😂

I don’t know the couple but my assumption is that they didn’t want to pay out for a buffet that would cater for the correct amount of guests, to save money they’ve halved the costs and the food and made themselves look stingy by sending that email out.

Which in turn will make people have anxiety about how much they put on their plate

Better wording would be “we are providing nibbles in the evening” so people know it’s not a full meal

Adding to my comment, saying they would provide nibbles would make most people assume to eat dinner before attending

It’s normal to have an evening buffet, people know it’s not the same as the wedding meal. This to me reads like they don’t really have the money to cater for evening guests… which is fine, but in that case you should probably make sure the guest list is smaller.

I’ve not seen it before but I don’t think it’s that odd. That said, most weddings I’ve attended have been massively over-catered, including my own.

That says to me they haven’t catered for everyone. Make sure you eat.

hungry weddings are awful!

Great idea, went to a wedding once and photos etc took so long we were thinking of nipping to a very close by shop to get a bread roll or something but didn’t- nearly cried when we saw how little food there was!!!!

There won't be enough buffet. Have your tea before you go.

Lol they sound stingy and rude!

I remember when we were planning our wedding, the caterers said you could choose four or six canapés per person. Maybe they have gone for the smaller option.

I also got told off once at a wedding by the caterer for taking too many canapés. I was in my early 20s and probably looked younger than I was so maybe she thought I was a teenager. I’m by no means a big eater!

What terrible etiquette. If you can't be confident there will be enough food you either need fewer guests or a bigger buffet. I mean, there are some people who eat a lot of buffet, but they're usually off set by those who don't. I've never known a host ration people in advance before.

This is exactly what I was going to say!
Rude and stingy indeed.

The best way 👍

Fascinating what couples do for their weddings nowadays.
Worrying about some of the guests stuffing themselves may be legitimate, but it's a risk the hosts take if they decide to have a buffet. Best not to draw attention to it by sending out advance accusations. On the day, Caveat Eater is the best advice.