Pre-wedding email. Bit weird?

[bookworm8500]

Invited to a colleague's wedding evening do and had an email come through to all guests (unless it has just come to me 🤣). Maybe I've just hit the nail on the head 🤣

It states, amongst loads of other instructions, that,

'A small buffet will be provided. This is for all guests to enjoy, so please be considerate with your portion sizes'.

I've never seen anything like that before! AIBU to find that very weird to be on a pre-wedding email?!

I'd assume they've catered for fewer guests than are actually going.

A lot of people do it with buffets. Catering for 50 when you have 75, assuming people won't eat a lot.

It's just a stingy cost cutting thing and often doesn't turn out all that well, especially if they are average size portions to begin with. They will end up with hungry guests.

Make sure you pack a snack!

This seems fair that they have pre warned guests although I don't agree with under catering because everyone wants food after a drink I would just in this case eat before I go my wedding was not prepaid drinks either I was on a budget however I did put on buffet so much so that it was wasted but I know over catered

maybe they've got some greedy bastards in the family who go batcrap crazy near free food? :D

What a crappy thing to email their guests. Either have enough food or reduce your guest list. I'd email back and ask them if you need to bring some picky bits to help out 😁

Better to over cater than under cater.

I don't think it's OK to under cater an event, even if you have warned your guests. It's stingy and rude.

I wouldn't go, it sounds like the food will be budget and sparse and that's the main reason to bother to go to a wedding.

Omg that sounds awful tbh. Like implying that people are uncouth and greedy. Like little kids. 'its for everyone to enjoy'. Lol.
The reality is they have probably cheaped out big time so there's barely a crumb of grub per person. They've obviously invited plenty of people to make sure they get lots of gifts though. But fuck you if you eat more than two cocktail sausages?! 🤣🤣

😂

This is such a weird take?
I would rather have all my friends and family there and only have nibbles for evening guests than not invite people so everyone can have a sit down meal.
Going to a wedding isn’t about food it’s about celebrating a marriage and giving people a chance to catch up and have fun.

You are right, but when you invite people to a wedding, it is customary to provide a meal, (of sorts) as part of that celebration.
If you can't afford to, then have a smaller event.

I think what they mean is this is intended to be a light "picky" buffet, not your evening meal. And that's OK, but I can't think of a good way to actually say it in advance.

It’s about how you do it. An invite stating ‘please join us for drinks and dancing to celebrate…’ tells you there won’t be food or only nibbles but doesn’t have the rude tone of this email.

What is it with under-catering at weddings in this country? How are people not ashamed of underfeeding their guests when they have come to celebrate you. Evening guest or not, if you can't afford to make sure there is more than enough food then reduce your guestlist.

It is a bit weird but then I've heard horror stories of people taking massive platefuls at wedding buffets and the people at the end of the queue having nothing- maybe they're just trying to avoid that

We were invited to the evening part of a wedding....when we got there the buffet had been pretty much demolished....what remained looked hideously beige. It was dreadful and I was starving. The couple divorced in the end

@LittleRedRidingHoody I have a family member who announces they haven't eaten all day every time they come over to ours for a gathering. They seem to see it as some kind of challenge to eat every last scrap they can get their hands on before anyone else, and possibly also saving themselves some money 🤣🤣🤣

OP agree with PPs who say to eat dinner before you go!

I would take this to mean "have dinner before you come"

The catering company DD works for has started advising people hosting events to mention appropriate portions for people having buffets. For hot buffets they also now only do it if they have a staff member serving because they were getting complaints about food running out despite their offerings being very generous.

People have become ridiculously rude.

At a wedding I was at recently several people had two plates piled ridiculously high each. It's ridiculously rude. So much food was wasted as well.

I think what they mean is they're providing "nibbles" rather than an evening meal, which I think is Ok at an evening do, but they needed to find a better way to say it.

Probably aimed at someone like my dad who would eat twice as much as anyone else in half the time and (pretend to) be oblivious that it’s not ok to eat more than one normal portion.

A bite like that wouldn't stop greedy fuckers though! They don't care

That's a good point, actually.

That's a very sweet take, but meanwhile in the real world - for a lot of guests, going to a wedding is absolutely about food and drink 😅 (As WELL as everything you say, of course).

Hungry guests are grumpy guests.

You need to cater for those you invite. A buffet is fine but there needs to be enough. And if you're having to email your guests to tell them to go easy on the food, that means there's not enough.

This was my first thought as well. When I first got on MN in 2018 or so, there was a series of posts about under-catering at weddings. It was tale after tale of people getting a small spoonful of shepherd's pie if they were lucky and leaving the reception hangry. I had to wonder if this was honestly the norm in the UK.

Also if it was send to work colleagues invited it was likely specifically aimed at Brian from accounts or Mary from IT. Every workplace has one of those people