Neighbour is a convicted paedophile

[Abitlosttoday]

I have just found out that our close (proximity-wise) neighbour has been given a suspended sentence for looking at peadophilia online. His address, in the news report of court proceedings, is not our street but an address in a different town. However, it is him (there's a clear photo) and he has been living on our street with his partner for at least a year. I saw him a few days ago when he pulled his two dogs out of the way so I could pass with my kids. They're 4 and 7. (The kids, not the dogs!) I don't know what to think. It's a small street. I can see into his living room from mine. It's a small town too. His partner is my SIL's sister's boss. I don't know their names though - that's the level of familiarity. Just because my head is battered with half-term and I am exhausted, aibu to ask what your thoughts would be about this situation. All his crimes were online but some of the images were the worst sort.
We only know because another neighbour has a distant work connection to the guy. He may believe he has some anonymity here. I cried when I heard. I'm angry too. My head hurts, but that may also be because of this endless school break!

Tbh if you agree to meet up with a child for sex then I actually really don’t care what happens to you.

In my experience this meant helping him and his parents hide his conviction from me by only having his parole officer visit when I was at work, even after I moved in with them. Despite the fact that I have two younger siblings in his preferred age range who regularly visited us.

Oh and then when he reoffended and I found out suggested I should have been suspicious because I was younger than him (by 2years!) and looked young for my age

Same with a house near us. I’m glad it was in the news so we are aware. I’ve told the kids to keep away from that house, but it’s hard trying to tell them why.

Worst thing was his girlfriend stood by him, she repulses me more than him.

Wow! I’d be really upset too. I’d be warning my kids and letting him know if he so much as looks at them he’s got me to answer to. I’d tell the police where he’s living asap in case they need to know.

@TwoNinetyNine

I see the nonce lynch mob are out in force as expected

Well there's quite a few on here saying he should be left in peace & that OP is being overly dramatic.

If he's served his time and is a free man then as unpleasant as his past is you have to deal with it.

I don't see any mention of doing time. It seems he is on a register. So he's still free to do as he wishes & just has to hand in his devices from time to time.

Absolutely tell your neighbours, and make sure all of the children know to stay away from him and his partner. The more people who know, the more likely he’ll be uncomfortable and have to move? I’d absolutely be telling everyone.

Im not sure but maybe you could go to the police for advice. Sorry your in this situation.

Would you want one of these beasts living next to you and your children.

I hope this is not a relative who looks like the man in the paper. It is not impossible.

We had one right next door to us when I was 16. I had very young children in my family also. The neighbour's son got convicted and sent down. He was gone something like three months before he was back. He'd abused little kids in his own family when they let him babysit them. His parents weren't even bothered about keeping him away from kids when he got out. Many excuses made. We had to watch the little ones went nowhere near him. My niece beat the shit out of him this one time when she caught him looking at her little sister but I don't recommend it these days as you're more likely to get done than he is.

Why would I?

And thinking of them as beasts, animals, monsters etc. doesn't actually do anything to protect children what protects children is intelligence and people actually using their brains which seems lacking these days

OP - please ignore the many deranged posters downplaying this man's crimes and suggesting your natural concern for your own and other children is problematic. I used to work in this field and you would not believe the amount of people who secretly don't think child abuse is actually that bad. They genuinely seem to think that defending pedophiles from an imagined 'hysterical' low IQ mob is somehow the more enlightened, kind position. I've seen these apologists in positions of power (incl in the cjs) and they are extremely dangerous.

Can you make your children aware, in an age appropriate way and non-alarming way, to keep away from him at all costs. I would also inform all parents you know locally too, especially his next door neighbours - I would want to know. Do it anonymously if you like.

This. I see this as positive. You know who he is and what he is and can ensure that your children avoid him. Neither you nor your children can be groomed by this man. Paedophiles can live anywhere and you usually have no idea who they are.

I always take the attitude OP that we have a paedophile living on our street as we probably do! I'm sure you have raised your children the right way with clear instructions never to go into anyone's house or car and how to respond to such suggestions.

I sympathise with your reaction. My sibling had similar and actually caught the man watching the house.

Personally I would share the article with your neighbour who has children. I would pop down to the local police station to ask their advice and also share that the address seems to be different.

Then i would get on with my life.

I am sure this has already been said but this is a good thing. You know now. I think that probably lots of us live within walking distance of a paedophile but don’t know it. This means you are in a much better position to protect your children and those around you. Knowledge is power.

They might "have to live somewhere' but you have a right to be aware and make others aware, a moral duty to do so when children are involved.
Paedophiles do not 'serve their time' because the sentences are far too lenient and I don't think they deserve to go about a nice quiet life and have those around them be polite and act normally with them. I would make very clear that I want nothing to do with him and his partner and that I wish they would remove themselves from anywhere in my vicinity.
These disgusting perverts are however more common than anyone thinks, but I think being vocal about what we think of child abusers, including online crimes which feed the abuse, zero tolerance or acceptance at any level (talk of how they need to live somewhere, or they have served their time) can stop. I would rather they didn't live anywhere. Removing one word from that last sentence.

So you are only assuming it is him , you do not have positive proof - you know, information from the police?
Also you've only just 'found out' yet your kids have had no problem with him so far, nor have you.
This is how lynch mobs start

Another questionably weird response!
Ahhh ignorance is bliss eh!
You’re either a do gooder that would rather be polite at the cost of a child’s lifetime mental health, a peado protector/apologist or…….

Orrrrrr…… we protect our children at all costs by letting people know who they are, what they did.

As for your comment on the vigilante videos, how can anyone enjoy watching fully grown adults genuinely believe they are interacting sexually with children and off to get their disgusting needs met by a child they’ve manipulated online. Only this time it wasn’t a child.

You seriously need a moral shake up.

He will have to report to police station every week, and provide proof of address. You could do a report online to your local police if you believe he has not notified change of address. These type of offenders are strictly monitored and have an individual officer and department within the police allocated to them. (Management of sexual and violent offenders team) He will want to stay under the radar and perfectly safe to live nearby, so don’t worry.

Exploited? Yes these poor, poor men. Such victims they are. Let’s all remember to place our sympathy with the correct party - paedophiles.

As for PPs saying these men served their time? Uhh no, they get a slap on the wrist.

It would make me feel very uncomfortable too. But the fact is that most of us live near or work with paedophiles and know nothing about it. Knowing your enemy is a huge advantage when trying to keep your children safe. Focus on equipping your children with the knowledge that will keep them safe (when they're old enough, explaining what grooming looks like, for example. Talk openly). As a parent that's all you can really do.

We are all living near, working with, or otherwise in daily contact with men accessing child pornography online. Only a few are convicted. Not all men of course but too many men. So it is an advantage to know who one of these men is. Be more worried about men who have access to your children rather than this one who you can ensure does not have access.

Are you in the UK? We don’t have parole officers here.

You're quite correct it was something to do with probation not parole. I've clearly watched too many American crime shows recently.

That said I only met her once so maybe she was attached to the probation service but not an officer? We're going back 16yrs now but it was rough

"He will have to report to police station every week..."

This is incorrect. That only applies when the offender is homeless.