To do our own Christmas dinner?

[Chrissstmasdinn]

So me and DH, married this year but have 3yo and 1yo. We’ve always went to either family for Christmas dinners - my mum has had more of us tbh as she’s quite pushy

We’re getting a dining table after we got rid of our island during new kitchen fitting so DH suggested why don’t we host our own dinner? Us and the kids

I liked this idea and still do! I mentioned to my family who’ve been mentioning Christmas dinners a bit and they’re fuming with me and DH

said it’s all him? That its mean of me that he should go to his mums and I should go to them with the kids?

AIBU to want to do my own dinner with my little family? We’d be going to see family before and after it

@Chrissstmasdinn OP, I totally get having Christmas in your own home with your children. But why can't you invite the grandparents to join you at home? I'm guessing part of their upset is that they live so close but are not invited for Christmas dinner, the highlight of the day.

I mentioned them coming. They ignored me and carried on belittling me for having dinner in my house

I mentioned it again last night. They said no :/ so I’ve offered

its just that they want it their own way it looks

Oh, that IS unreasonable then. 😢

So your husband is supportive, works hard for his family and wants to have dinner with his kids at home.

Your sister and mum are sending you spiteful texts and telling you how awful you are.

I know whose feelings I’d rather prioritise on Christmas…

Sorry but your family sound overbearing, overdramatic and quite frankly mean.

Maybe you’ve allowed your mum to be to involved and need to take a step back and put some boundaries in place. The fact she wants to split a family up on Christmas Day so she can have her daughter and grandkids round and send the husband back to his parents is absolutely ridiculous and very selfish. How can she even think it’s ok? I wouldn’t even keep going round in circles with her, tell her one last time your having dinner at home and if they would like you to, you will all call in during the afternoon, if that’s not good enough ok I’ll see you after Christmas!

This is your mum's issue. It's not one for you to resolve.

In fact, every time she started, you could say "mum, why is everything a competition with you? Just be happy that I am happy"

What does it matter if it's a week earlier or later? She still gets the Christmas visit. She gets a visit around Christmas time. She may produce a full Christmas dinner but it won't feel the same as on the day. She won't get the excitement of everyone opening piles of presents. It's not the same.

The question is, did she travel to in laws for Christmas? Or did she stay in her own home?