I know IABU - just lost it over a parent and child space

[General90]

I feel awful because of my eldest child and it was so out of character for me.

we were going to our local supermarket which is always full of people parking in the child bays without children. Anyway, a car had followed us on the motorway and a roads and had driven like a lunatic, tailgating me and cutting people up. She was in front of me when she pulled into the car park and took the last child space and got out and walked into the shop. My DH was driving so I got out and went in where I proceeded to ask her to move her car and she was aggressive to me so I just lost it and we had an argument in the shop.

my DS didn’t witness me shouting at her but I’d tried to get her attention when she’d parked and so he knew there was an issue.

all the way home he was saying he was worried and asked if the police would arrest her. I feel horrendous that it’s by behaviour that influenced this. I know I should have just left her and found another space.

I am pregnant and hormonal, but didn’t excuse my behaviour.

I did a similar thing ages ago. I had my 4 month old twins and 3 year old with me and a man in his 50s on his own pulled into the last parent/child space. Which then meant I had to park the other side of the car park and carry both babies with my toddler holding onto my leg across the carpark to put them in a trolley. (Not easy). Additionally the normal spaces barely open wide enough to open wide enough in order to carry both babies together.

Anyway as I got to the trolleys I noticed this man was only just getting out of his car (looked like he had been finishing off a phone call). So I called him out on it and said "thanks to your selfishness and parking there I've had to struggle with these 3 across the carpark and had to trust my toddler to safely walk with us. Thank you". He completely ignored me, barged past me and walked into the supermarket.

I then proceeded to burst into tears (I had pnd) and hadn't slept for 4 months. A different kind man came up to me and offered to do my shopping for me at this point. (Restoring my faith in human kindness).

BTW I am more than happy to park further away from the door if the parent/child spaces were there. But I need wider spaces in order to get 3 children out the car and a trolley nearby to put them in!

Your child didn’t see the shouting but plenty will have done in the supermarket

Most people have done irrational things like this, have things shoot out of their mouth before they know what it is, acted badly

We are human and flawed

To read many posts on here you wouldnt think it, most peoples shit doesnt stink! And anyone who is flawed or not quite socially able or with the best etiquette or social skills or perhaps they're just a bit stupid are talked about as if they're hitler or something

We're just people, doing our best and sometimes we get it wrong and do something stupid. It hapens.

My preferred method of shaming the lazy fuckers is to loudly say something along the lines of “I know she hasn’t got a child darling but some people are so bad at parking they need the special big spaces”.

@Donimo gosh I’m sorry to hear your experience. As you say, it’s not the closeness to the shop door it’s the space. But I shouldn’t have acted the way I did. It’s not an excuse and I’m not saying it is, but I’ve been referred to PNMH and am struggling. But shouldn’t have taken it out on this lady, regardless of her response to me.

You really should get a buggy or something just in case there are no P&C spaces anyway.

Is a parking spot really so important that you started a shouting match in public with a stranger?

What do you want from this thread? A good kicking?

How old are your children?

Do you have children?

You dont need wider spaces, they are just more convenient. You can do your shopping without them, a lot of car parks dont have them in any case and you'll do like anyone else does and the trolley hovers somewhere near the boot. Hopefullly you are sensible and drive into the space front ways so that you have easy access to the boot and the rear seats, no good complaining about this sort of thing if you park the wrong way round

(I see a lot of people on here and in car parks who reverse into the space, you're not going to get your shopping in very easily or kids in and out very easily if you do that)

why did you need a man to do your shopping for you because you got upset that a man stole a parking space?

I wouldn’t put DS blue badge up in a P and C space. No need to it’s not a disabled space or other space where it is needed.

people really need to calm down about P and C spaces. If one is free use it if not park elsewhere. The world won’t end!

You were unreasonable not to have called the police about the tailgating and general lack of driving standards. Might have been difficult to block the car in so it could not have been moved.

@YellowAsteroid it absolutely isn’t, that is why I feel ashamed of the way I acted over something so trivial.

@MeowCatPleaseMeowBack i don’t know, but I couldn’t exactly call the lady so I was hoping to express how I am feeling to people who may be able to support me. As I said, I’m not looking for any gratification as I was the one in the wrong.

@soupfiend

You dont need wider spaces, they are just more convenient

Don't be ridiculous of course you do to get baby car seats in and out of cars especially with twins as you can hardly then climb over one side to get the seat out of the other

And then you would be in the wrong for blocking a car in deliberately.
No laws are broken , you don't get to police it

@General90

What did she say when you confronted her?

People are being quite nice so far but I'd be surprised if you end up feeling better at the end of the thread. Maybe talk it over with a friend instead.

That is being kinder than what I would say. The polite version would be a reference to Barnard Castle and testing eyesight.

I had a pram (at home). But I can't fit a whole shop in the basket under the pram and I can't fit a whole shop in my car with the pram in the boot (a double pram is large)

@MeowCatPleaseMeowBack why is that, what other responses would I expect to receive?

@amothersinstinct i asked her if she could move and said she’d taken the last space and she told me to fuck off

The poster used the word 'need'.

Its not a need, they are more convenient. And in any case she was able to park somewhere else and get (albeit a somewhat clumsy manner) to the shop

Car park spots are a convenience, they're not a right and if they're full, they're full.

The spaces aren't there so we don't have to walk 🙄They're not even always close to the entrance in every supermarket. They're there so that people have enough space to open their doors fully to get children in and out of car seats, and so there's a safe place to put up a buggy, and a safe walkway for toddlers/young children to walk down.

And blocking the rest of the car park surely

The simplest way to deal with this is to go to customer services, if you can find one manned, and report it. What then happens is nothing to do with you