Tmi but left sanitary towel in bathroom

[Embarrassed3]

This morning I accidentally left a sanitary towel on the bathroom side. I did roll it up as usual but it must have come undone. This has never happened before and it was a genuine accident. I normally always put it in the bin straight away. Next thing I know DP comes storming in the room shouting “are you having a laugh you fucking scruffy cunt”

I get that nobody would want to see that but it was a genuine accident that has never happened before and I feel so ashamed and embarrassed. I wouldn’t have a problem at all if he’d have come in the room and reminded me not to leave it on the side but what he did actually scared me a bit

Sorry I know tmi

I’m so glad you told him off! Why would you feel bad? You need to keep sticking up for yourself like this! Tbh I would think about leaving him for speaking to me in this way - it’s a complete lack of respect.

Oh my goodness. I have not read the full thread but PLEASE normalise periods for your kiddos and chuck this douche bag out.

I'm absolutely fuming on your behalf.

This

End this 'relationship' immediately OP, you deserve so much better.

OP, you clean up his pee and skid marks but he isn't able pop an ST in the bin without 'drama' ?

I hope he has somewhere to go to tonight when he gets back from football and finds his belongings in bin liners on the drive. Actually, I don’t care if he has anywhere to go.

PPs have said this one rant shouldn’t be a deal breaker but it sounds as if he’s been conditioning you for a while now (leaving pee and skid marks in your house make you his skivvy and you leaving an ST makes you a ‘fucking scruffy cunt’ ?).

I’m not usually in the MN LTB brigade but children or not, I’d be kicking him out. Your children need a better role model and you deserve a better 'partner'.

Kicking him out today doesn’t mean he can’t come back but his attitude would have to change a lot for me to let him over the threshold again.

Even without the wider context the OP’s given (he bullies and gaslights her and gives zero fucks about her feelings or happiness - all whilst living in her house), do you really think that calling your partner a cunt, shaming her and making her feel physically afraid in her own home constitutes ‘one angry remark’?

I find it astonishing what some people consider normal.

Do it, I would not want this man around me, never mind any children. You don’t want your children picking up this behaviour and thinking it’s acceptable. Get rid of him!

Disgusting - him, I mean, just in case it needed clarifying in your mind as you seem pretty ashamed, which I assume is because of him and that makes me feel so angry. He also sounds about twelve having such a reaction to something that will affect all women with regularity for many years of their life.

How on Earth did he deal with childbirth and the aftermath and the bodily fluids there? He sounds like someone who would also shame a teenage girl for having a typically teenage appetite and it'd stay with her for many years.

Leave him.

Switch it around in your head for a minute.
You’ve visited me ( I’m your sister, cousin or maybe best friend) and when you use the bathroom you see I’ve accidentally left a used pad out. What would you do? a) call me a scruffy cunt or b) wrap it in a bit of loo roll and pop it in the bin?

I’m betting no one would say a. And most caring partners would either do b or go find you and say love, you’ve left something in the bathroom. If they’re really squeamish and cannot touch or even say sanitary towel.

He's a vile man who hates all women
His OTT outburst was so nasty and unnecessary.
A kind respectful partner would have quietly rolled it up and binned it.
Your house and finances are secure, that's great.
Dump the disrespectful bully ASAP

It’s still a single occurrence.

I didn’t see the drip feed because I was frankly sick
of reading the thread by that time.

And yet, you're still reading now.

I did the same as you this morning, my husband rolled it up in tissue and put it in the bin. Your husband sounds like a nasty bully who you'd be better off without.

I doubt these type of men behave like this one single time. People don't just act like this completely out the blue because they're having a personality lapse.

So even though the house is yours, he's still entitled and arrogant enough to have a go at you!

Is he dependent on you for housing or could he afford to house himself?

I'm surprised a man that you share children with could have a reaction like that. I presume he's seen you give birth? A pad accidentally left on the side is nothing compared to that! Not a big deal at all unless you have a habit of leaving them there all the time.

No-one goes from being a kind, loving supportive partner………. To having a single occurrence shouting at their partner that they are a fucking scruffy cunt. Nope. Doesn’t happen. It’s such an extreme disgraceful thing to say.

If my lovely husband suddenly called me a cunt, or especially a fucking scruffy cunt, then I would be absolutely flabbergasted. And would absolutely reconsider our whole marriage. Anyone called me a cunt then I would never want to see/speak to them again.

Your partner sounds really horrible, I feel really sorry for you and your children. He'd be out the door.

This is not nice he said this. He’s showing contempt. You need to seriously get some advice from someone you feel comfortable with
Good luck … I hope you’re ok

Eughhh…. He sounds absolutely vile … sorry OP but like others have said , what a nasty thing to say . He’s the C* here, tbh

Has he spoken to you like that before? Anyone speaking to their partner so disrespectfully is unforgivable. You need to tell him how he made you feel.

A normal man would not have said anything and just thrown it away.
Once my husband found adult nappy that his mother who has dementia had put in the bath with faeces in.
He simply got rid of it and didn't say anything.
I don't think your husband would be a good father to a daughter , certainly should not use language like that when talking to someone he loves.

I once found a used pad in the changing room at the swimming pool, I went to the lifeguard and asked for a glove so I could dispose of it. I’m guessing it was a genuine mistake as nobody would do it knowingly surely. If I had seen who did it no way would I have spoken to a stranger the way your husband spoke to you, there is no need

He’s a twat. Next time leave a used one on his side of bed as you leave!

This type of behaviour is a huge 🚩 get rid. If the house is you’re tell him to go. You don’t need to be made to feel ashamed over a genuine mistake you say things have been rough lately, It sounds like he’s already checked out of the relationship if that’s the way he talks to you

He called you a what?

What a pig

If I did that, and I know I must have done due to tiredness, especially after the DCs were born, he would've put it in the bin without a word

If he's grossed out by that then god help him.

Seriously OP, LTB.