To be annoyed by hearing my DH saycomplishment today is making you laugh - to his work colleague

[Yuai]

My DH has a female work colleague with whom he has become increasingly friendly. They often chat when he’s WFH. I overheard a few interesting comments from him to her over time, but today, I overheard him saying to her: “I achieved something today, and that’s “her name” to make you laugh and put a smile on your face”. WTAF. They are both in highly professional-level roles. I personally wouldn’t dare make these kinds of comments to my colleagues. I asked them about his comment, and he said she’s a very close and supportive colleague. Frankly, he’s been very moody before becoming friends with her, so in a way, having her makes his highly stressful job manageable and improves his mood. But is this too much? He said some other questionable things to her too..

He's being flirtatious and has "mentionitis" about her. You need to have a serious talk.

I mean that does feel a bit different.

Would he be doing it front of you if it was dodgy.

You are doubting him. And you are seeing this happen in real life. We are just giving opinions based on a couple of things. It’s really hard to judge.

Highly doubt he would have said this flirty comment to a male colleague though, that's the point

When he's in the garden laughing on the phone and you look at him, does it look the same as when he's chatting to a male colleague/friend? When you hear him, is his tone the same as he uses with men?

Jesus Christ, can't men and women be friends without Mumsnet going into overdrive?

I saw him from the kitchen window as he has a garden office. He looked happy chatting to her…He’s always down but very happy when talking to her.

I think it a massive overreaction.

A colleague told me today that "he wouldn't know what he would do without me". I found the error is his spreadsheet that he spend hours trying to sort out.

If you are his wife, you would be filing divorce papers right now.

Colleagues can get on well without having affairs.

I think you need a chat with him - I wouldn’t be happy and you obviously have concerns.
Having said that I doubt my husband would be happy if I was so friendly with a male colleague and looking for things that would put a smile on my colleagues face.

Completely not ok.

I met my partner at work. It started like this - minus the married.

@onwardsup4 as I said, I've said similar and had it said to me, nothing flirty about it, just a friendly comment

This ^

He's flirting with her. Walking around the garden, chatting to her and wheeling out these lines? I'd have told him to get the fuck inside and stop giving the neighbours the cringe.

Seriously though, sounds like he's getting a bit too familiar with her. I would watch and wait but be preparing for some serious words.

I have a few close colleagues at work that would say stuff like this to all the time. Some female and one male. It’s not flurting it’s getting through some shit times in the office. We often send memes to each other on what’s app too whilst in meetings because it’s funny and you just know the other person will get it.

This is MN, where every friendly work interaction is an “emotional affair”, where predatory women are waiting in every stationary cupboard to pounce….. yet at the same time, on another thread a women who’s partner doesn’t like her talking / laughing with a single dad on the school run, is being told she’s doing nothing wrong.

Heaven forbid someone should actual mention a work colleague .. or then again it’s suspicious when they don’t, as why would they keep it secret - another MN bit of nonsense

I’ve said similar to male colleagues (and female ones), normally when they are having a tough time at work.. “see, made you smile, it can’t be that bad”

At the end of the day, you trust them, or you don’t.

It's the beginning of an emotional affair (at least). Anyone who can't see that is delusional...

This!

Yes well if he isn't usually like this with other colleagues and isn't having the same "banter" with John from Finance, then yes chances are that this is heading towards that...

He clearly likes her. As a woman, not as a colleague.

Eww that gave me the ick. It's a hard NO from me.

A bit David Brent for my liking!!

Context is everything. If it was my DP I overheard I wouldn’t be worried because I could and have heard him say similar to male colleagues as well. There’s camaraderie in his job the team are friends and friendly, he works with a number of women and he mention everyone, male and female, equally.

But in your context that it sounds out of place to you, he’s been a grump but suddenly is all smiles when speaking to her and has a case of mentionitis, yeah it would certainly make me a b it suspicious I’m afraid.

Listen to your gout on this one

A few months back, I overheard him saying - “You made my day, and I know you feel the same”. I am happy to be told I am being unreasonable.

Nah, this is emotional affair. How many women really think its appropriate for their husbands to tell other women that making them laugh and smile is their achievement for the day? Some people are so oblivious a plank to the face wouldn't register. Can count on no hands the instances my achievement for the day has been to make a male colleague laugh/smile, and about the same amount of times I've told them as such.

Sorry OP, its not good.

It's MN
Men are only ever flirting and you should never be friends with anyone at work or even be slightly friendly...