Is this signs of grooming creepy uncle

[Ladybug85789]

Children’s uncle from their dads side. He is in 40s never had a girlfriend addicted to porn, unemployed for the last few years. Whenever uncle sees nephews (age 8 and 4) is constantly asking for hugs, for them
to sit next to him and on his lap. Pouts when they don’t, contstantly asks them to sit close to him even when they say no. play fights with them asks if they want to sleep in the bed with him. Stares at the children when they are sat in the room. When he was employed he spoilt them with lots of gifts randomly and constantly buying sweets etc. once was playing with 4 year old and uncle bit him on his cheek very hard left a mark child cried alot. Always messages to ask to see the children on FaceTime lives 2 hour drive away.
the Children have never shared a bed with him or been left alone with him as I find his behaviour odd and disturbing and I am uncomfortable around him. He is close to his niece his others brother child she is a teenager now she gets gifts from him and he private messages and calls her quite often.

I want to confront creepy uncle and say keep a distance from my children. (We see around 10 times a year and as he lives with children’s grandma the children stay over sometimes always with me)

Thoughts

I would be reporting him to the police for showing porn to children, and after the biting incident he would never have seen me or my children again. Trust your instincts on this one.

It's a plain as the nose on your face the cunts a pervert and should not have him visiting him at all.
Apart from all the other weird things he bit your kid and he is still allowed near them, if he'd bit my kid I'd have beat him with an inch of his life.
I'd also go to the police and report my concerns I bet if they checked his computer he's got weird stuff on in the pedophile
Please please please report to the police I have a terrible feeling there is a lot more to his behaviour.
I know you don't like confrontation but you may save another child from a life of misery down to him.

Jesus, there is NO WAY I would have ever allowed a 'person' like this to be around my children. TRUST YOUR GUT.

He bit your 4yr old on the face!? There is something really wrong here, absolutely keep him away from your kids.

He bit one of your DC and made them cry!

What the hell?if someone did that to one of my children I'd have smacked them one,got my children away from them and made sure they never saw us again.

God, don’t talk to him! Talk to the police and tell them about your niece too! I think they would be very interested in his Internet activity and you may very well protect her as well as your kids (and potentially others)!

I would have reported this to the police. If he bit him it was surely because he was sexually aroused. OP you have to protect your children : they are under no circumstances to even be around him. Explain to grandma that this is a non negotiable. Stop being so friggin polite and get angry. I would be livid and the mama bear in me would have no problem to tell the uncle exactly what I thought of him and to stay the hell away from my kids or else! Find your anger OP and protect your children from this predator. Also reach out to niece and ask if she's OK. She could have been molested but groomed with money, gifts / scared into silence. Talk to her parents as well and voice your concerns about his behaviour. Atleast you would have done what you can for her. Adults need to step up and stop being polite when all the indicators are screaming abuse!!!

Your mum is right. KEEP YOUR KIDS AWAY FROM HIM.
This man is dangerous. There are multiple red flags but the biting was enough reason to never let your kids be around him again.
You don’t need to explain yourself. Just tell your ex’s family that you will not be allowing your kids near him, ever.

OP please don't go into defensive mode, we are all very concerned about your children. And as pp said you have probably been groomed in a way as well and pushed by family to accept his predatory behaviour. Most people on here do not want you to feel bad, we just want you to protect your children. So find the strength to put firm boundaries in place for your children but for you as well. I sincerely wish you all the best in the future and I'm so sorry you and your children had to be exposed to this creep.💐

He bit one of the kids?

That alone is a big reason to say you're not seeing the kids again.

So tell her she can't bring him. Seems pretty simple to me. He assaulted your child and he harasses kids for physical contact they don't want. That's more than enough reason to cut him out of your life. Tell ex all this and that he cannot have this creep around the kids unless they are supervised every minute.
These are your precious children. You need to get tough to protect them.

Trust your gut!

Even if he wasn't a porn fiend he is inviting children into his bed - surely that's the biggest red flag. I don't understand what I'm reading and how there can be a question

I think the police might be interested in the content of his devices.
In and out the bathroom when kids are bathing/naked is not normal,in fact neither is the rest of his behaviours.
I'd be getting gran to visit you and no more contact with the uncle.

I would never see this man again I can't believe you even need to ask, he is a total creep

You are doing the right thing by barring him from being near your kids. I suppose your exh family might feel insulted but you are doing the right things by protecting your kids.

His family might be blind to his strange behaviour because they are family. Byt even then, no-one in their right mind would think leaving bite mark is an accident.

I think coming on and out of the bathroom is a huge red flag and also getting them to sit on his lap. I would have openly told him "we don't do that as it's inappropriate for a male relative.". It's pretty clear that he doesn't respect their boundaries. I'd be interested to ask the children cautiously what they think of him.

Christ, I forgot the bed bit. Thats a definite line crosser.

@Ladybug85789 Hope you are staying strong. Well done protecting your kids by never leaving them alone with him. Trust your gut and get firm boundaries in place. Please report him to the police as he sounds like he has P interests and therefore may have abuse on his phone. If the police do find things this may take the problem away completely and also protect other children. Only advice on this is to stagger it, so don’t speak to the family and report at the same time so they realize it was you. Also ask the police how your anonymity can be protected. Good luck and it is a horrible, difficult situation with the family that seems borderline complicit in ignoring it. Your mother is right. Also your instincts. Your poor niece not being protected by her family.

Being a pushover - what a pathetic excuse. PROTECT your children now.

He bit your child on the face??? That would have been the last time he was ever in their presence, even without all the other creepy shit you’ve described.

It's not always as easy as that. This man is a family member who lives with the children's paternal grandmother and the OP is separated from the father of the children. It probably isn't possible to prevent any contact unless her ex agrees. If OP "goes ballistic" likely everyone will side with creepy uncle. OP is already supervising closely and calling out creepy behaviour. She should definitely carry on with that. Anything further needs to be carefully considered. One thing I would say is if you aren't comfortable with his behaviour, make sure your children know that. And make sure other adults know too.