Not to help catch a stray/escaped dog! Now it’s my fault it’s been injured apparently!

[notmyproblems]

Someone’s dog keeps escaping and for some reason it kept making its way into my garden. It had been dodging cars apparently and being a nuisance. Regularly have people knocking asking is it mine.

Two weeks ago someone saw it run into my garden and they were banging on the door . I answered (I was WFH and busy) and they were demanding to be allowed into the garden to keep hold of the dog till the warden could get there. I said no. Wait till it goes back out again (I didn’t want someone I don’t know in my house / garden) then catch it and secure it .

Ive since got the gap fixed and the dog can’t get in anymore. Haven’t seen it

Had a knock on the door today (same person) saying the dog had been hit by a car and they’d had to take it to a vet and how it all could have been avoided had I allowed them access and they hoped I was happy with having it on my conscience. So i just closed the door as they were still talking which made them shout and bang on the door???

Im not the irresponsible dog owner so it’s not my fault !

@phoenixrosehere I was speaking more in general - this attitude that because it's not your dog or your family or your problem, that you can just shut the door and ignore it (literally and figuratively).

I just can't imagine behaving that way.

@Procrastinates she didn't need to help catch it, just let the guy into the garden and shut her door behind him? It would take two minutes of her precious time 🙄

And if rather than passing through her house where she was working alone he decided he'd rather beat rape and rob the OP? Suppose it'd be her fault for letting a strange man in her house then.

Women are allowed to put their safety and even their comfort before strange men and strange dogs. She knew nothing about this man and all we know now is that he's aggressive and unreasonable. Yet you think she should blindly let him into her home? Maybe two minutes of your precious time should be spent looking up the number of women assaulted by men every day.

If that were true and it was so easy, wouldn’t someone have caught the dog by now? It runs around enough that people notice yet no one has been able to catch it and no dog warden has come out either.

People saying that OP didn't know if the dog was even there would be easily solved by her looking. 5 seconds.

All estates have local animal rescuers that will rush to collect cats that have been knocked over or escaped dogs. A quick fb post would have got help, especially if the dog is so well known. 5 seconds.

If the dog is so well known for escaping I find it hard to believe that no-one knows where it lives or the situations surrounding the escape.

Someone could have put something against the gap in the fence trap the dog in OP's garden.

I can't imagine any boss not understanding OP having to log out for a few minutes to attend to this issue.

Maybe the dog couldn't be caught but OP wouldn't know as she didn't try to do anything. Not even a sm post or text to friends or to discuss or think of a solution. Just a no.

I'd forgotten MN was endlessly paranoid - mi mistake! 🙄

So your boss would have been happy with you loosing 2+ hours of work to catch a dog?

The man wanted to go in the garden AND WAIT FOR WARDEN, not just catch the dog (which may or may not have been quicker).

And you’d been happy with a random man in your house. One that proved himself to be aggressive later on.

Yep. Sounds do logical to me

Oh who cares? If the person who is responsible for the dog isn't bothered about its safety, why should you be? Dog people are such a pain in the arse, dominating everywhere and everything these days.

The latest event is not OPs fault but the refusal to allow the dog to be contained previously is pretty heartless.
The man wanted to stay in the garden not in her house but as per MN paranoia that's basically inviting a serial
killer in!!
I’d be the same. I wouldn’t want a strange man (or woman) in my garden for 2 hours with a dog that’s not mine, especially being at home and I have young DC.
I'll assume your doors lock? such weird attitudes, I've yet to meet one of these paranoids in RL

Yes, I'm vegan and would much rather save any other animal/wildlife crossing the road. There are far too many dogs now anyway and it's an environmental nightmare.

@ComingBackHome what are you on about - nobody had to miss two hours of work

All OP had to do was let him into the garden, lock the door and carry on with what she was doing.

I'm also not surprised he was a bit aggressive with her, her attitude stinks imo. But then, this is MN, nobody seems to want to help anyone, let alone a man or a loose dog!

the man showed he was aggressive and unpredictable when he showed up at ops door shouting and banging two weeks later, that’s not the actions of a nice normal man.

People saying that OP didn't know if the dog was even there would be easily solved by her looking. 5 seconds.
She did that.

All estates have local animal rescuers that will rush to collect cats that have been knocked over or escaped dogs. A quick fb post would have got help, especially if the dog is so well known. 5 seconds.
Done that too. Warden said it would take several hours before they came.
(and not all estates have animal rescuers btw. Ours doesn’t)

If the dog is so well known for escaping I find it hard to believe that no-one knows where it lives or the situations surrounding the escape.
Someone could have put something against the gap in the fence trap the dog in OP's garden.
And then what? Look after the dog in the garden. Spend time contacting potential owners, having no response.
There are cases like that around where I live. It always takes a day or more of contacting and reaching out/taking the dog to the vet etc…. And that’s when the dog is friendly enough which we have no idea about.
Or she could have waited for the warden with a dog panicking that they couldn’t go out again. Potential damage to the garden or to the dog if left alone - more time away from her meetings.
And of course you need to have the right materials to close the gap, find them, put them in place. Not a 5 seconds job either.
im really wondering who you think the ‘someone’ is really…,

I can't imagine any boss not understanding OP having to log out for a few minutes to attend to this issue.
So no not a 5 second job at all. So yes the boss would have been upset.
Plus that’s assuming the OP’s job isn’t time sensitive
Lets say working on safeguarding issues with children that would then have to wait (meeting reported until everyone is available etc…)

A 75 yr old woman was recently seriously assaulted by a man who gained access to her house by pretence. It's a common form of distraction burglary.

Soryy I absolutely adore animals but women's safety is paramount. Women are allowed to be 'rude' or 'unkind' or 'uncooperative' towards strange men.
Ted Bundy used to single out murder victims by getting them to 'help him'. The one woman who refused and fought back survived.

Did you read the part where this man, an utter stranger would only be able to get into OPs garden by coming into her house? And he'd refused the alternative suggestion of waiting for the dog he was so very concerned about where it had got into OPs garden instead?

It's not paranoia to not want to let an unknown man into your house with you, it's just sensible. She'd have no way of making him leave if he decided not to. A woman who'd put the safety of a dog over her own safety needs better boundaries.

If posters would genuinely let any unknown man who knocked on their door into their house while they are there alone, they are either very naive or have led a very charmed life.

All I can say is I'm glad I don't live my life in abject fear of every single male person I happen to come across 🤷‍♀️

But being MN, I'm surprised nobody's come along to tell OP off for answering the door to a man in the first place 😬

He didn't turn up shouting and banging, he behaved like that when OP shut the door in his face.

Not nice behaviour but let's not twist it into something it's not.

I don't live in abject fear of men all around me. The ones behaving normally, going about their business. I'm more suspicious of men who pretend there is some moral imperative of coming into my home rather than just stand by a fence.

Turning up two weeks later to berate op is unhinged and aggressive. Banging and shouting on a door when someone has shut it is still equally aggressive.

All estates have local animal rescuers that will rush to collect cats that have been knocked over or escaped dogs. A quick fb post would have got help, especially if the dog is so well known. 5 seconds.

Yet, no dog warden showed up when this man supposedly called.

In my area, there are usually known runaway pets reported on the community page and people have tried to catch them or locate their owners to no avail. Some have contacted the warden and nothing has happened and eventually there is a post about one being hit. There’s also the issue that the owners may not even be on SM or on the community boards. Everyone doesn’t just move to an area, hop on Facebook (if they have it), and join the community boards and if so check it regularly.

It's much safer to try and catch a dog in a garden, away from a busy road and traffic, than it is to try and grab it through a fence where it's likely to panic and put itself in even more danger.

But let's not let logic get in the way of a little Friday morning panic about men.

Exactly this. If he wanted to get this dog so badly, why not wait by the fence? It was clearly an option which is why OP suggested it.

He probably didn't have an ulterior motive but it's right to be suspicious in a situation like this.

If I had a man knock on my door and say he needed to retrieve something from my garden but in order to do that he would have to come through my house and not through the gate I would be saying no. Same principle, there was another option available to him to try and catch this dog but he didn't want to.

He was probably hoping for cups of tea or something rather than trying to rob/rape but that's also not OPs responsibility.

Turning up two weeks later to berate op is unhinged and aggressive. Banging and shouting on a door when someone has shut it is still equally aggressive.

I'm not defending his behaviour but I still can't imagine being in a situation where there was a scared, frightened dog in my garden and I just shut the door and left it there.

I still don't get why the man wasn't unreasonable for being so cold-hearted and uncaring that he wouldn't wait by the hole in the fence? And what any of that has to do with the incident two weeks later?

MN is insane.

Yes dog wardens take ages but local rescuers come much quicker.

She didn't have to let the man in if she didn't want to.

All the ifs and buts are irrelevant as she didn't attempt any of them. She just said no. Which was very cold.