Not to help catch a stray/escaped dog! Now it’s my fault it’s been injured apparently!

[notmyproblems]

Someone’s dog keeps escaping and for some reason it kept making its way into my garden. It had been dodging cars apparently and being a nuisance. Regularly have people knocking asking is it mine.

Two weeks ago someone saw it run into my garden and they were banging on the door . I answered (I was WFH and busy) and they were demanding to be allowed into the garden to keep hold of the dog till the warden could get there. I said no. Wait till it goes back out again (I didn’t want someone I don’t know in my house / garden) then catch it and secure it .

Ive since got the gap fixed and the dog can’t get in anymore. Haven’t seen it

Had a knock on the door today (same person) saying the dog had been hit by a car and they’d had to take it to a vet and how it all could have been avoided had I allowed them access and they hoped I was happy with having it on my conscience. So i just closed the door as they were still talking which made them shout and bang on the door???

Im not the irresponsible dog owner so it’s not my fault !

@Petitchat

that really makes no difference to my point.

something doesn't have to be someone's 'responsibility' to make helping the right thing to do.

Makes a lot of difference.

Doing the right thing outside in public is no comparison to letting a strange man into your home and garden, stopping work and trying to catch a dog that may bite out of fear.

Absolutely nothing like helping someone outdoors in public.

Any robbers reading this, simply lob a dog over the fence and gain instant access.

Yes, and get a cuppa while you're there...

Yes, because it is absolutely smart to allow a stranger in your home to seemingly wait for the dog warden they called and to approach a dog that comes and goes out of your yard as it pleases because all dogs are perfectly safe to approach and everyone feels comfortable approaching one with nothing but their bare hands. 🙄

Where is your ire towards the man who couldn’t be bothered to wait on the other side of the gate after he was told no about entering OP’s home? He was so worried about this dog, yet he didn’t come back to ask OP about it later in the day or the next day. He called the dog warden, yet nowhere does OP say that the dog warden actually came to her house that day.

He waited two weeks to come to her door to blame her for it being hit and him having to take it to the vet then when she closed the door because he was shouting, he continued to shout and bang on her door.

I'm confused, how is this event in any way connected with the dog being injured 2 weeks later? Has the dog been roaming all this time? I'm thinking what I would do re letting the man in, honestly think I'd be hesitant given his door banging and aggressive manner. Fact he didn't wait by fence makes him seem more suspicious. If OP is online working then there is an unsupervised strange man in her garden with access to her whole house.

If you didn't want a random man staying in your garden for hours waiting for the wardon, he could have just caught the dog and lead it out of your garden to wait for the warden. Is there no gate to your garden? I wouldn't put a dog at risk even though it is the owners responsibility to keep it safe. It's a living creature. Or couldn't you have gone in the garden and put something to block the gap so that the dog would be secure and safe in your garden?
Unless you are in the middle of surgery I can't really see a job that would mind you briefly stopping to help a dog in danger. YABU

There is not much point the op keeping the dog secure and safe, when its owners cannot be bothered to do the same thing. If you read the first line of her op, you will see this was not a one off occurrence. The dog would have been loose again in a short space of time and accidents will happen. None of which is the op’s fault.

Does the OP k ow the owner? Getting the dog safe was the immediate problem that she could have helped with. She said no and didn't offer an alternative method of helping. She could have helped secure the dog then reported the issue if it is true that the dog keeps escaping. The owner may need help, maybe they are ill or elderly. Who knows, but to ignore the immediate danger to a living creature seems unbelievably cold. I am not saying that she should have let the man in but there were other options.

@Petitchat

you're conflating two different issues. what I'm talking about here is the people saying it's not her responsibility, and it's not, but what I am saying is just because it's not someone's responsibility doesn't mean they can't still do the right thing/help.

Say friends and their kids are visiting, a child starts choking, do you do nothing because it's 'not your responsibility' or do you help them??

It also makes a difference if OP knows the owners and the dog itself. For example, not a good idea for her (or the man) to try and grab a strange dog if the dog is scared or seems vicious.

But what about putting a makeshift block on the hole in the fence to secure the dog in her garden? There are many alternatives than just saying no and shutting the door.

I cannot believe the amount of people that wouldn't help.

Most estates have a dog lost group that could help if the dog was secured.

There have been some ridiculous replies on this thread and it also serves as a great example for a number of people have shit reading comprehension skills.

The OP explained people have been regularly knocking the door asking if this dog is hers. The dog has been escaping as regularly and was described as causing a nuisance. Likewise the OP getting her door knocked by random people asking if the dog is hers when it escaped is a nuisance. If I’d have been in the OP’s position, this bloke and anyone else who banged the door would have been on the receiving end of one of my, “oh for feck’s sake,” replies, especially if they’d been demanding to be let in to the garden too.

I’d have said no as well. I’m afraid people who are criticising the OP are failing to recognise this dog getting injured was on the cards. It had been escaping regularly, getting into trouble on roads and thus it was only a matter of time before it got hit.

The stupidity of the unhinged bloke banging on the door is let’s just say the dog had been hit after the OP fixed the gap the dog came through, the bloke would have probably blamed the OP for daring to get the gap fixed!

The unhinged bloke banging the door, choosing to come back to guilt trip the OP, shouting and banging the door again deserves some sense being knocked into him, preferably with a saucepan just like Pauline did to Arthur in an episode of EastEnders many moons ago.

You are right, but bear in mind that on Mumsnet women who work at home are the lowest form of life and dogs trump human beings at all times.

Letting the man in wasn't the only option.

The dog was in immediate danger. Yes, more needed to have been done once the dog was secure to try and prevent a reoccurrence but in that moment there were many options to help an innocent creature rather than saying no.

I don't see it relevant at all that the OP is a female wfh.

Of course not, because they're friends and you know them. That's the right thing to do.

The wrong thing is to stop your work, invite a strange man into your home and garden and try to catch a frightened dog.

Explain the other options please.
Remembering that one option was to continue working and not let a stranger in.

Dogs that are well-trained will come on command even from a stranger. I rescued an escaped dog on a busy road and she listened to me carefully. It was a joy to rescue her.

I think OP’s case is different. A man she didn’t know requested access to her place and then he comes back to shout and bang on her door two weeks later.

I would get a camera. If the man comes back, it may be time to speak to the local police. His behaviour is alarming.

OP is entitled to fix her fence. If anyone is irresponsible, it is the dog’s owner (who may be this man), and they need to secure their dog.

I would never open the door to a random anyone with my toddler DD at home.

You not understanding why that's relevant is probably why your takes on this have been so bad. That and all the assumptions.

You don't even know whether the dog was there on this occasion. OP has only said the bloke claimed it was. If it was, you don't know whether OP would've been capable of safely securing the dog- if you can speculate that the owner had a disability you can do the same for OP. You don't know if it might've attacked her, the size of it compared to her, whether it would've needed a lead that she doesn't mention having available. Its all ridiculous.

I'm confused, how is this event in any way connected with the dog being injured 2 weeks later?

I'm guessing that was the only chance to catch the dog in that time & it was running around ever since.

Obviously the fact that the bloke could have waited where the dog would have exited Op's garden but didn't is Op's fault.

I can't imagine not doing whatever I could to try and secure a loose dog that was running through traffic.

Of course you have no legal obligation to help but I don't understand people who just say "not my problem" and ignore it.

You must have a very understanding boss then. I can't imagine many would be happy for their staff to spend an unspecified amount of time of their work day catching a stray dog...

This thread looks bad on women, going by some posters.

Their working from home is unimportant, they can just leave at any time even when busy.

They will put themselves at risk with a random stranger and an unknown dog.

Job unimportant
Safeguarding nil

Some of the replies on this thread are wild.

When this happened to me, the dog wardens refused to come. Apparently it was up to me to catch the dogs and somehow find their owner, or let them keep terrorising my pet and breaking my DCs toys on my own property. OP doesn't mention the dog warden ever came, and the dog was still running around 2 weeks later so either it was loose that whole time, or the owner did nothing about stopping it getting out again. OP could still have a strange man in her garden now if she'd done what some are suggesting and let the man in.

Women are not the world's mum. It is not OPs fault the dog got in her garden,and it is not for the OP to risk her personal safety letting an unknown man (who later turned out to be aggressive) into her home. Women matter, OPs safety (and job) matter. We're not service humans here to make everything better and fix all problems.

Plenty of people have knocked on OP’s door about the dog yet none including the man were that concerned to wait on the other side where the dog would eventually escape from. The dog warden that he called didn’t show up and none of these concerned people checked about the dog afterwards in the two weeks including this man who decided to come and blame OP over it. My bet is this man was hoping OP would be guilted enough to offer to pay the vet fees he supposedly did which OP didn’t say he showed proof of this and then he continued to be aggressive towards her after she shut the door.

There’s also no guarantee that this dog would have allowed strangers to get ahold of him nor should OP have risked her safety, home, and livelihood over it when again concerned people could have waited on the other side of the gap. The dog bites them, OP could be liable since it happened on her property and neither them or her know who the owners are and the dog could probably be put down if it did more than just a bite.

Some of you may be happy to risk it, but others aren’t and shouldn’t be expected to.