Page 2 | Husband farting is giving me the ick

Marriedtoafarter · 2024-10-10T07:04:36+00:00

What can I do / say to stop my husband farting so much. He claims he can’t help it but I can hear he forces them out and they stink. I’ve said it isn’t fair for me to breathe in that air, said it gives me the ick, asked politely, asked sharply, asked so many times for it to stop and it does maybe for an hour or two but then he will fart again when we go to bed for example and it makes me shudder. I love him so much but it makes me not want to cuddle or kiss him let alone anything else!!! Any advice??? 😷

ThisHangryPinkBalonz · 10/10/2024 08:50

RampantIvy · 10/10/2024 08:11

Of course he can't help it. There will be a reason why he produces so much wind. Look at his diet.

Seriously, most people are capable of knowing when they are going to break wind. OP even said he's forcing them out.

BettyBardMacDonald · 10/10/2024 08:51

ChairmanMeowww · 10/10/2024 08:43

Urgh I’d get the ick as well. DH never farts in front of me, just like I don’t to him, because we’re adults that respect one another. Keeping the spark alive can be hard as it is, you don’t need farts thrown into the mix.

His diet is his responsibility, you’re not his mother. The amount of posts on here where if there’s something wrong with the husband, not just farts, but other things he should take responsibility for. People start suggesting ‘book him this, do this’. How about men take responsibility for a change?

This.

I'm 61 and have never experienced a single incident of this from any man in my life, nor would I tolerate it.

Could not be physically attracted.

OP if he loved you he wouldn't inflict this obnoxious, disrespectful, rude and juvenile bullying on you. Because that's what it is: deliberately causing you unhappiness and discomfort.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 10/10/2024 08:51

RampantIvy · 10/10/2024 08:11

Of course he can't help it. There will be a reason why he produces so much wind. Look at his diet.

He can help it, no one goes round the office farting willy nilly.

aurynne · 10/10/2024 08:52

This was one of the many reasons I ended up losing any sexual attraction to my ExH. He also said "he couldn't help it", but coincidentally he never, ever farteds at work, in front of friends, or even in front of his family. It's like his sphincter only failed in my presence. I could never understand it, in other areas of his life he was very clean and proper. But for me, the constant loud farting was a turn-off. I don't miss it. My current DP does not fart in front of me, and I love it.

BettyBardMacDonald · 10/10/2024 08:52

CherryogDog · 10/10/2024 08:49

My DP farts loads, the smell makes me heave. His diet is terrible and he drinks a lot, but won't do anything to change it.
He once farted in the car, and I had to hang my head out of the window retching, while he was laughing hysterically.
Another time he farted in bed, and woke himself up with the smell, and then moaned "what is that stink ffs" .
If I say anything he just says I fart too. Yes, correct. In the toilet, or another room.

How can you tolerate this?

TrumpIsACuntWaffle · 10/10/2024 08:53

Skirtandshirt · 10/10/2024 08:08

Have you tried telling him absolutely no cuddling, kissing or sex until he stops, and sticking to it?

Fucking hell. We'd be celibate

Catza · 10/10/2024 08:54

GreatNorthBun · 10/10/2024 08:44

This just... isn't true. I make no comment about this OPs husband, but what you've just said is so obviously untrue! Why would it be this terribly embarassing thing that happens to people if it was also something they did on purpose? It doesn't make sense for you to believe this, really.

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It is not embarrassing for a lot of people, which is my point. Farting in public is seen as normal in Britain (and, I am guessing, in the US seeing how many slapsticks comedies include burping and farting jokes). Somehow, I went through 25 years of living in continental Europe never smelling any of my family members' farts or experiencing it on public transport. Yet, in the UK, I am routinely subjected to smelling someone's arse fumes.
Also my postgraduate knowledge of anatomy and physiology informs my opinion that a person with normal sphincter control can very much hold their farts for a few minutes until they are able to go to the toilet and release them there. Circumstances under which it is not possible may include severe digestive issues where the person is at high risk of pooping their pants as well as farting unexpectedly. Even then, there is usually a time delay between them feeling like they need to go and actually going.
If you can give me a scientifically-sound reason for why my comment is untrue, I will happily reconsider.

ExtraOnions · 10/10/2024 08:54

He needs to go out of the room ..it’s not funny, it’s disgusting.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 10/10/2024 08:57

Catza · 10/10/2024 08:54

It is not embarrassing for a lot of people, which is my point. Farting in public is seen as normal in Britain (and, I am guessing, in the US seeing how many slapsticks comedies include burping and farting jokes). Somehow, I went through 25 years of living in continental Europe never smelling any of my family members' farts or experiencing it on public transport. Yet, in the UK, I am routinely subjected to smelling someone's arse fumes.
Also my postgraduate knowledge of anatomy and physiology informs my opinion that a person with normal sphincter control can very much hold their farts for a few minutes until they are able to go to the toilet and release them there. Circumstances under which it is not possible may include severe digestive issues where the person is at high risk of pooping their pants as well as farting unexpectedly. Even then, there is usually a time delay between them feeling like they need to go and actually going.
If you can give me a scientifically-sound reason for why my comment is untrue, I will happily reconsider.

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Farting in public isn't seen as normal in the UK, people might do it but it's seen by the majority as disgusting.

Catza · 10/10/2024 08:59

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 10/10/2024 08:57

Farting in public isn't seen as normal in the UK, people might do it but it's seen by the majority as disgusting.

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That's not been my experience with some of my friends whose older kids fart in a car and they all have a giggle about it. If I did that, my parents would go ballistic and I would be shamed for doing it outside of the toilet. Not saying that it is a right approach either but, at least, I learned that doing it anywhere else is inappropriate.

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 10/10/2024 09:01

A garden hose discretely inserted into his rear end and run down the trouser leg. The other end can be put out through the letter box.

You can get a hose spray head with different patterns e.g. jet, mist, soaker etc. You will need to experiment to establish which is best at diffusing the offending odour.

NB: this may encourage foxes/badgers to compete, as they are likely to interpret it as an invasion of their territory.

CoffeeGood · 10/10/2024 09:04

The occasional, accidental squeak can be hilarious in the right circumstances. What you are describing is not remotely funny and is downright gross and more importantly disrespectful. If you were belly laughing along with him, I could see why he might force one to make you laugh. However, he knows you find it gross so he is being incredibly disrespectful and I would have to sit him down and have a serious talk about it. Ask him if he forces farts out in front of his colleagues at work? Does he do it when he's at friends' houses? In the supermarket? If not, why not and why does he disrespect you so much that he thinks it is acceptable to do it in front of you when you have clearly told him you don't like it.

SimpleThings101 · 10/10/2024 09:05

This calls for desperate, shock measures.

Leave any room you are in immediately each time he does it, even if cooking etc.

Sleep in another room.

Every. Time.

Itsbaloney · 10/10/2024 09:07

loveydoveyloon · 10/10/2024 08:46

laxatives - he will only force 1 out again 😂

This 😃

Conniebygaslight · 10/10/2024 09:07

ChairmanMeowww · 10/10/2024 08:43

Urgh I’d get the ick as well. DH never farts in front of me, just like I don’t to him, because we’re adults that respect one another. Keeping the spark alive can be hard as it is, you don’t need farts thrown into the mix.

His diet is his responsibility, you’re not his mother. The amount of posts on here where if there’s something wrong with the husband, not just farts, but other things he should take responsibility for. People start suggesting ‘book him this, do this’. How about men take responsibility for a change?

Me too and my DH wouldn't dream of being so disrespectful to me.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 10/10/2024 09:08

Catza · 10/10/2024 08:59

That's not been my experience with some of my friends whose older kids fart in a car and they all have a giggle about it. If I did that, my parents would go ballistic and I would be shamed for doing it outside of the toilet. Not saying that it is a right approach either but, at least, I learned that doing it anywhere else is inappropriate.

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Omg that's revolting,my ds would never have done that!

RampantIvy · 10/10/2024 09:18

Catza · 10/10/2024 08:37

Do you imply he has no sphincter control? He can't control gas production but every adult (and child from about the age of 2) can hold a fart until they get to the toilet. Farting in public is a choice.

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I meant that he can't help the need to do it. He can help where he does it of course.

Threelittleduck · 10/10/2024 09:25

My husband also farts a lot. I'm pretty sure it's something medical because he does it everywhere, not just round me, but he refuses to go to the doctor "because it's natural".
So no advice but huge sympathy.
I'm going to get some charcoal tablets but if your husband is doing it on purpose I'm not sure what to suggest

Teeshs · 10/10/2024 09:25

spicysugar · 10/10/2024 08:12

I bet he doesn't just do that at work or with friends. You're right,it's disgusting and shows he doesn't respect you. Obviously it can happen very occasionally or if someone is unwell. But there's no reason to do it so casually and thoughtlessly.

This.
He has a fundamental lack of respect for you.
I would move to a spare bedroom.
Don't have children with someone who cares so little for you.
You will bitterly regret it.
He certainly wouldn't do it in front of a woman whose opinion mattered to him.
Yours no longer does and denying that reality will cost you.
He has checked out of your marriage.

BruceAndNosh · 10/10/2024 09:28

I'm incredibly farty but I can chose when and where I let go. In private.

BettyBardMacDonald · 10/10/2024 09:28

"He certainly wouldn't do it in front of a woman whose opinion mattered to him."

Well said. This is the key point OP needs to ponder.

Locutus2000 · 10/10/2024 09:30

ExtraOnions · 10/10/2024 08:54

He needs to go out of the room ..it’s not funny, it’s disgusting.

Ironic username alert 😀

MellowMallow · 10/10/2024 09:30

BettyBardMacDonald · 10/10/2024 09:28

"He certainly wouldn't do it in front of a woman whose opinion mattered to him."

Well said. This is the key point OP needs to ponder.

Or a woman he found attractive

PaperLampshade · 10/10/2024 09:30

BettyBardMacDonald · 10/10/2024 09:28

"He certainly wouldn't do it in front of a woman whose opinion mattered to him."

Well said. This is the key point OP needs to ponder.

Yup.

The13thFairy · 10/10/2024 09:47

You don't like it and you've asked him not to do it around you. Nevertheless, he delights in doing it, forcing them out in your presence. Not at work, not at social gatherings ~ he reserves the smell from his bowels just for you. I'm guessing he didn't do it on the first date, either. He waited until marriage, because you're trapped, and now he can show his contempt for you. Would you divorce him because of this? He thinks not, and perhaps he's right. And if he is right, then there is absolutely nothing you can do about this. Just put up with it. You are agreeing never to be sure you can draw a clean breath around him. Think about if you can welcome this for the rest of your natural.