Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Christmas time off

162 replies

Girlinblue · 08/10/2024 14:40

This will be my second Christmas in this job. I work in a team of 5 and we are closed for the bank holidays but other than that there has to be at least 2 people in. Last year I worked Christmas Eve and the days between Xmas and new year. so was hoping that I would have it off this year because surely the fairest way to do this is to take it in turns each year?

Christmas time off has been talked about a few times because we just have to decide between us who is working when. It doesn’t get allocated for us. A couple of the women that I work with have talked about having Xmas off again because they have kids and have things to sort out. I said yes but I don’t really want to work it again because I did it last year and you both were off, so it’s not very fair if the same people are getting it off every time. They are saying that the people with kids should take priority. But just because I don’t have kids doesn’t mean I don’t also have things to prepare and things/traditions of my own. I want to spend time with my family and make plans etc just as much as they do.

I was thinking of bringing it up in a meeting to my manager to say how it needs to be split fairly. Myself and my other child free colleague also deserve to have the time off and our Christmas isn’t any less valuable to those with kids. i know some people don’t care about Christmas and some people do think it’s just for kids. But for me it’s not, I have a big family that I rarely get to see throughout the year and Christmas is the time that I get to see them and spend time with them.

Would I be unreasonable to bring this up further and insist that this should be split fairly each year? How is the best way to do it without causing unnecessary drama?

OP posts:
daliesque · 10/10/2024 20:40

@YellowAsteroid oh yes. That wedding has been ten years in the planning for my partner as it took me that long to agree to marry again. No way is it being moved.

YellowAsteroid · 10/10/2024 20:48

I hope you have a wonderful day @daliesque - getting married on Christmas Eve is the height of romantic in my book! Flowers

daliesque · 10/10/2024 20:55

To be honest that was one of the main reasons I finally said yes! He suggested it along with hiring a castle in Scotland for the Christmas period for our wedding and ma-hoo-sive party! He knows me well.

MarkWithaC · 11/10/2024 10:58

daliesque · 10/10/2024 20:28

I've got a great one this year.....we've finally managed to recruit a third consultant. Before it was me and one other. He's a Muslim so doesn't celebrate Christmas but does like to occasionally take the opportunity to visit family or non Muslim friends over Christmas. We've sorted it out between ourselves for 5 years now.

This year as we both ended up working last year due to lots of junior staff illness, the new consultant is on the rota for over Christmas. However, because I don't have children I should do it for the third year running because she needs to be there for young kids etc. her husband is a sahd btw so no childcare issues. Our other colleague will be on a sabbatical so she was ok with him not covering as he'll be in Australia from end November until feb. So it's me who should step up so she can have Christmas morning with her (teenage) children. My plans can be moved, apparently, and done at another time of year.

I'm getting married in Christmas Eve.

You mean she claims that she needs to be there for her 'young kids' BUT in fact her children are teenagers?
I mean, either way she can get to fuck.

Have a fabulous wedding! can I come, I love a castle in a cold place

menopause59 · 11/10/2024 11:02

Girlinblue · 08/10/2024 14:40

This will be my second Christmas in this job. I work in a team of 5 and we are closed for the bank holidays but other than that there has to be at least 2 people in. Last year I worked Christmas Eve and the days between Xmas and new year. so was hoping that I would have it off this year because surely the fairest way to do this is to take it in turns each year?

Christmas time off has been talked about a few times because we just have to decide between us who is working when. It doesn’t get allocated for us. A couple of the women that I work with have talked about having Xmas off again because they have kids and have things to sort out. I said yes but I don’t really want to work it again because I did it last year and you both were off, so it’s not very fair if the same people are getting it off every time. They are saying that the people with kids should take priority. But just because I don’t have kids doesn’t mean I don’t also have things to prepare and things/traditions of my own. I want to spend time with my family and make plans etc just as much as they do.

I was thinking of bringing it up in a meeting to my manager to say how it needs to be split fairly. Myself and my other child free colleague also deserve to have the time off and our Christmas isn’t any less valuable to those with kids. i know some people don’t care about Christmas and some people do think it’s just for kids. But for me it’s not, I have a big family that I rarely get to see throughout the year and Christmas is the time that I get to see them and spend time with them.

Would I be unreasonable to bring this up further and insist that this should be split fairly each year? How is the best way to do it without causing unnecessary drama?

Have you spoken to your manager OP we need an update

Original poster
Girlinblue · 11/10/2024 11:17

menopause59 · 11/10/2024 11:02

Have you spoken to your manager OP we need an update

Edited
Show quote history

Yes I did. So because there’s 5 of us he said there will always be someone that gets two off in a row. So one of the women i have spoken about can have it off again but will need to work next year but the other will have to work. He told them to work it out between them. I can have it off but my colleague who also worked last year wants to work it again this year because he doesn’t celebrate Christmas. So I guess he might always work and then only one of us will need to join him. But it’s been decided by my manager that it won’t be me, and one of the others who worked last year will need to step up and do it

OP posts:
LlynTegid · 11/10/2024 11:31

Good to read of the conversation ending with the outcome you wanted.

Hope you have a lovely time over Christmas.

Notasunnydayhere · 11/10/2024 11:36

Nogaxeh · 08/10/2024 15:29

Did you not see the other thread from the parent who can't find childcare and is being asked to work over Christmas?

I do think that people who don't have childcare responsibilities should do the decent thing and volunteer to work over Christmas.

Why? When did someone's childcare become other people's responsibility?

MarkWithaC · 11/10/2024 11:38

Girlinblue · 11/10/2024 11:17

Yes I did. So because there’s 5 of us he said there will always be someone that gets two off in a row. So one of the women i have spoken about can have it off again but will need to work next year but the other will have to work. He told them to work it out between them. I can have it off but my colleague who also worked last year wants to work it again this year because he doesn’t celebrate Christmas. So I guess he might always work and then only one of us will need to join him. But it’s been decided by my manager that it won’t be me, and one of the others who worked last year will need to step up and do it

Show quote history

Good outcome! I hope your colleagues don't blame you or sulk.
But if they do, fuck em Grin

DragonGypsyDoris · 11/10/2024 12:20

Girlinblue · 08/10/2024 14:40

This will be my second Christmas in this job. I work in a team of 5 and we are closed for the bank holidays but other than that there has to be at least 2 people in. Last year I worked Christmas Eve and the days between Xmas and new year. so was hoping that I would have it off this year because surely the fairest way to do this is to take it in turns each year?

Christmas time off has been talked about a few times because we just have to decide between us who is working when. It doesn’t get allocated for us. A couple of the women that I work with have talked about having Xmas off again because they have kids and have things to sort out. I said yes but I don’t really want to work it again because I did it last year and you both were off, so it’s not very fair if the same people are getting it off every time. They are saying that the people with kids should take priority. But just because I don’t have kids doesn’t mean I don’t also have things to prepare and things/traditions of my own. I want to spend time with my family and make plans etc just as much as they do.

I was thinking of bringing it up in a meeting to my manager to say how it needs to be split fairly. Myself and my other child free colleague also deserve to have the time off and our Christmas isn’t any less valuable to those with kids. i know some people don’t care about Christmas and some people do think it’s just for kids. But for me it’s not, I have a big family that I rarely get to see throughout the year and Christmas is the time that I get to see them and spend time with them.

Would I be unreasonable to bring this up further and insist that this should be split fairly each year? How is the best way to do it without causing unnecessary drama?

This is a symptom of weak management. It needs a fair decision from your manager.

CrazyGoatLady · 13/10/2024 08:32

Girlinblue · 11/10/2024 11:17

Yes I did. So because there’s 5 of us he said there will always be someone that gets two off in a row. So one of the women i have spoken about can have it off again but will need to work next year but the other will have to work. He told them to work it out between them. I can have it off but my colleague who also worked last year wants to work it again this year because he doesn’t celebrate Christmas. So I guess he might always work and then only one of us will need to join him. But it’s been decided by my manager that it won’t be me, and one of the others who worked last year will need to step up and do it

Show quote history

Seems like a fair outcome OP. I hope your colleagues don't pressure you or guilt trip you because they think it's not fair he's allowed you the time off.

NefertitHR · 08/11/2024 17:44

Startingagainandagain · 08/10/2024 15:00

Completely agree with you.

Management should have taken the initiative of making it clear there is a yearly rota for Christmas where everyone will be expected to cover the Christmas period one year and then be off the following year.

No exception.

Anything else is discriminating against child free and single people.

If your manager is too weak then refer the issue to HR.

Completely agree it's unfair but it's not a factor for discrimination being childless.
I would say it's being treated less favourably and certainly raise it. Hopefully your HR department is decent and collars your management on this, I have spent most of this week having this type of conversation with management on colleagues' behalf....as they are too spineless to do so.

Not made me popular but as HR you HAVE to stand up where people aren't being treated fairly.

If you don't, well, get out of the industry because you're not doing your job.

For the record I have kids and am working Xmas eve and in-between Xmas and New Year.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread