To think that non-binary candidates are more unlikely to be offered a job?

[GinnyPiggie]

I have a non-binary child in their twenties and they are really struggling to secure work.

It might be unfair of me, but I really think that in presenting themselves as non-binary, they are going to struggle to be offered a job with the vast majority of employers. Yes this might be pure discrimination but personally I'd be worried about HR issues and getting sued for saying the wrong thing.

AIBU to think that if you have a range of good candidates, you are going to be reluctant to hire a non-binary candidate because of the potential for issues in the office?

Thank you for your straightforward explanation

Feel free to knock yourself out laughing then.

I manage a team and conduct interviews. I don’t care how someone identifies. All I am interested in is their suitability for the job, whether the answer the questions and provide examples. I look at work history and want to understand gaps in employment. If they are the best candidate then they get the job regardless.

If they are not invited to interview perhaps there are stronger candidates with more experience on paper. Tell them to look at ways to stand out more. Perhaps look at them contacting a recruiter who can help?

If failing at interview, ask for feedback and work on that.

What you don't seem to get is that it is risky to hire people who make a big deal out of their gender identity in this way.

If they don't hire the person, chances are there will be absolutely no consequences. At worst the candidate asks for feedback and you just fob they/them off with some bland platitudes like, "Thank you for your interest in this role. We thought you were a good candidate but there was someone else who had more relevant experience."

If they do hire the person, there's a very high chance of the shit hitting the fan and everyone ending up down the employment tribunal at some point. Because we're talking about a group of people who frequently cause conflict, whose feelings are hurt very easily, and who cry "transphobia" and go running to HR at the smallest perceived slight.

An excellent reminder 👏

I wonder if you might have something there. Employers might well be avoiding any potential agro. Especially when you consider that it’s such a high profile issue and still sadly so open to prejudice and misunderstanding. Also there’s the whole huge issue of single sex bathrooms and the possibility of complaints from existing (perhaps highly valued) members of staff. I’m so sorry Op. It’s a very un-ideal world still. Employers arent interested in doing the right thing if they suspect it could be more trouble than it’s worth. They’re chiefly concerned with the well-being of the business after all and that’s going to inform all their decisions. Rightly or wrongly.

Posters can spout for ever on how MN is rife with transphobia; it’s getting tiresome how that old trope is persistently trotted out.
It’s not transphobic to defend women’s rights! If you see transphobia, please alert the moderators.
From where I sit, the insults flow one way; from the TRAs citing ‘hate’ calling posters ‘vile’ as ‘phobic’

Dadjoke really doesn’t like women does he? Or doesn’t like women having opinions maybe??

What rights do transpeople not have?? Yes- absolutely the right not to be bullied or mistreated but nobody has ever answered this.
Transwomen are not women
Otherwise why transition?

To return to OP, it might be something other than the Nb; your daughter should ask for feedback. It can be really helpful.

might depend on the sector. Some recruiters are actually looking for "non typical" candidates to meet their diversity commitments. I think the job market is just hard

I’ll let you know….i have yet to come across anyone bleating on about the other 8 protected characteristics they may or may not have on a CV 🙄

This. I couldn't care less if someone is non binary or whatever. I want a candidate who makes a god impression, answer the interview questions well, is not full of themselves so they are able to focus on the job rather than themselves. They're there to do a job, get paid and that's it.

I was a senior colleagues to a junior non-binary member of staff. Holy moly, they were a PITA. Fresh out of uni and talking over people in meetings, introducing themselves as HI, I'm Fiona, my pronouns are they them. Like who gives a crap.
I mean, I don't introduce myself saying Hi I'm Palm, I have a wart on my foot as it doesn't matter to the project meeting we are all part of. IN fact, it sound rather sexist to me. A paid role is a paid role, no matter if it's a male or female doing the job or indeed anyone's representation of femininity and masculinity. Focus on the task, not on yourself. It's attention seeking and rather obsessive. Let your work speak for itself.

But I guess Op's dd is having trouble because that is the real world. It's Darwin in action.

*a good impression 😂

The only pronoun I use when I interview is you.

If an application asks for pronouns, feel free to complete them. If you aren't asked, take a hint and concentrate on the rest the application.

A god impression might be better, who knows 😂

I think that the cost of my politeness has been grossly underestimated!

I was speaking to the example of a pp's husband declaring they were female to obtain an interview. None of the roles I have ever interviewed for have been restricted in this was. Roles are open to all. Therefore I can say with certainty I have never experienced this. Pronouns probably wouldn't be obvious. They would not hinder an application is used.

Age, gender, or any other characteristics would not be shared during sifting or interview. The only thing that may be shared is a disability under the guaranteed interview if minimum requirements are met. The nature of disability would not be shared or questioned.

Agreed. The mental gymnastics required to be around the oh so specials. They salivate at the prospect of a good misgendering! Victimhood! They get a victimhood cookie!

I wouldn’t be keen on employing someone who introduced themselves with I’m Bill and I’m a born again Christian or anything else irrelevant that makes them sound too self absorbed. NB is just one of any number of off putting intros.

ErrolTheDragon

That we have got to the stage where we have to say female lesbian, is very concerning.
Lesbian should be all the definition required.

I would assume the person was narcissistic to adopt an activist label and I would expect them to create trouble of all kinds.

It personally wouldn't bother me. I don't want to assume someone is going to cause extra drama if I haven't seen actual signs of being dramatic.

Amen to all of this.

But how can you be non-binary and lesbian? If you have had surgery and changed name to not be female but be non-binary how can you be lesbian? I'm sorry but I'm tired and I think people want to make things complicated. I am a woman who has never liked typically female things like fashion, make up etc but I don't need to call myself non-binary just because I don't fit in the stereotypical folder. I think that is the problem: people think that a woman or a man has to be a certain way. Instead of calling yourself non-binary why not expand what a woman can be like. Because we ARE born a certain way and we will biologically stay that way no matter what we call ourselves. Again, I'm tired.

@Maria1979 you can’t be, and when it’s questioned it all falls apart which is where the super handy “transphobe!” insult comes in handy.

It isn’t mental gymnastics to love my family members and children of friend’s who are going through this journey and facing all this hate from ransomed on the internet. To respect and support them with whatever they decide (gay, non binary, trans).

To read pages and pages of bile and stereotypes which bear no resemblance to the people I love and care for, from people who barely know a trans person. I find it deeply offensive and disgusting, and it makes me fearful for people who just want to get along in the world that so many will just hate them for merely existing outside of a narrow box a few people have deemed ‘acceptable’.

Just grim and depressing. And I feel sad for my friends who are parenting people who are transitioning, because all this nasty bigotry just makes them more afraid for their child’s future. Maybe one day it will be your child/grandchild/friend’s child. Let’s see if you can look them in the eye, having known them all their lives and repeat all the nasty things that have been said here, and if you still believe it as you apply it to someone you love.

Do you see the irony in saying that gender critical people are against gender stereotypes, but then saying violence comes from men, you are discounting any violence committed by women which makes you as much someone who gender stereotypes ad those you are complaining about.