To think that non-binary candidates are more unlikely to be offered a job?

[GinnyPiggie]

I have a non-binary child in their twenties and they are really struggling to secure work.

It might be unfair of me, but I really think that in presenting themselves as non-binary, they are going to struggle to be offered a job with the vast majority of employers. Yes this might be pure discrimination but personally I'd be worried about HR issues and getting sued for saying the wrong thing.

AIBU to think that if you have a range of good candidates, you are going to be reluctant to hire a non-binary candidate because of the potential for issues in the office?

I’ll be honest, if a candidate arrived for an interview, was obviously female, their CV said Dave and they immediately felt the need to tell me they use they/them - that would immediately translate to me as ‘I’m special I’m not like other people and expect special treatment and everyone to tip toe round me otherwise I’ll be straight down to HR’

Just gives the immediate impression that they will be grief to manage - rightly or wrongly but it’s the truth.

Does my arse elbow need it's own pronouns?

I just want short, sharp, relevant answers to my interview questions. That’s all. If I don’t ask what the candidate’s pronouns are or what their gender identity is then I don’t need to know it to make a recruitment decision. People need to focus on the job and evidencing their suitability for it rather than telling me a whole lot of superfluous information about themselves, whatever that is.

Isn’t it ‘gender non binary’, not ‘sex non binary’? Ie, not a 3rd or other sex, just an expression of gender which doesn’t fit into the ‘rules’ of male or female?

Therefore one can believe there are only 2 sexes, but still call yourself non binary if you wear a skirt one day and a suit and tie the next?

I agree. The only way I can see non binary existing is by perpetuating sexual stereotypes. How can non binary exist outside of stereotyping. I really wish someone would give a clear, unconvoluted answer to that (and not just say ‘google it’, which is a cop out response).

So if anyone can tell a dummy like me what non binary is that doesn’t rely on biological sex stereotypes, it would make me understand a lot better.

Humour me OP. Is your adult child neurodivergent? Same sex attracted or bisexual? Experienced any kind of sexual assault?

And serious question: do they spend a lot of time online bleating about how discriminated against they are? Does your adult child actually WANT to work or do they quite like living off the Bank of I'm So Hard Done By aka Mum?

Of course!

Quick, make some up and state them as the 'norm' and everyone now has to refer to your arse as 'sir' and your elbow as 'm'lady'

This

It's not rocket science. This is what employers are looking for.

Has the OP answered how the employers / interviewers know her child is non-binary?

Oh, I don't disagree. It's full of wisdom, and the support for women with terrible partners, for example is amazing. There is a wealth of knowledge on obscure subjects People here can be very funny, and kind, too.

There are even plenty of people who fully support transgender rights. But they tend to get hounded off the feminism forum, and keep off threads like this, just using the Thanks button. LGBT Parents threads asking for help get dogpiled by GC people. You can guarantee you'll get attacked if you say anything supportive of trans rights, whereas racists tend to get moderated reasonably quickly.

Where I don't agree is that the Feminism forum is not a representative cross section of people, it is literarlly the nerve centre of the gender critical movement in the UK. It's profoundly influential. If it wasn't such a deeply regressive cause, you could almost admire it.

www.vice.com/en/article/mumsnet-uk-mom-forum-terf-transphobia-feminism/

As with " how do you know someone is vegan?"
Oh don't worry they'll tell you.
It would absolutely put me right off I'm afraid.

Personally, I think it is a bit OTT to announce that you are a "they" in a context where you are going to be talking "I", "you". It might make some people feel as if you're going to be a bit of a nightmare if people slip up. I'd save it for afterwards, but I'd have no issue working with a non binary person and using "them"

What does non binary actually mean?

I thought you were either male or female? There are only 2 options, so a binary choice

As a matter of interest, what sort of work is your DC looking for?

Yet YouGov polls show the opposite.

And whenever people are made aware that 92% of transwomen retain their penis and testicles, so its a male with male genitals in the ladies, they overwhelmingly say no.

non binary work

obvs

I totally agree.

"They" generally refers to the plural, so I'd struggle to call an individual person "they"

I will gladly and happily offer jobs to women of childbearing age, ethnic minorities and people who declare disabilities, and have done in the last couple of years.

I'm extremely hesitant about employing trans or NB people for reasons previously explained.

No one on here seems to be able to say what it actually means.

To be honest they should just focus on the job. Anyone who introduced themselves with some irrelevant aspect of their identity be it gender race religion sexuality etc would mark themselves as a bit self obsessed and attention seeking.

She can just use her name. Her pronouns are of no use to anyone in an interview as they will be saying "you" not "they".

She will look back on this with embarrassment in a few years!

None of the trans stuff exists without gender binary- if you can’t point at something and say thats a girl thing, and something else and say that’s a boy thing, then you can’t swap from one to the other or refuse to say you are either- you have to have a ‘thing’ otherwise you can’t define yourself in opposition to it!

I wouldn't offer an interview as I'd assume they had mental health problems, are unintelligent or lack self awareness. Probably all 3.

I think 'Meeeee so special!' pretty much sums it up.

America (as we can see, as time goes on and more sunlight is shone on the ideology as disinfectant, more people are against it),
and YouGov UK.