To be frustrated with my friend who’s become a “guru” after a trip to India?

[Silentfriend]

My friend recently went to India and has returned with a completely new attitude. She now acts like she’s a life guru, constantly telling people to quit their jobs, disregard their managers, and dismisses “first-world problems” with a “you just don’t understand” attitude. She even created a separate Instagram page to give out life advice, though it seems more like she’s having a mid-life crisis rather than offering genuine wisdom.

I’m getting really tired of her constant preachiness and the way she’s acting superior. AIBU to feel frustrated with her attitude and the way she’s using her trip as a platform to push her new “enlightened” persona?

Jumping in on this thread. As an Indian this is really quite funny to me! Spiritual materialism is really a thing, where you think you are more spiritual because you've collected more of something--life experience from a trip, in this case!

I would just take a back seat in the next few interactions and try and observe what she says and does. Maybe she really found her spiritual self? Find out what she is selling, and perhaps encourage her to do the same for herself (e.g., quit her job)!

I also think this is very funny. She sounds like a walking sketch show.
If you can see the funny side of it, it will get you through it. It will take the feeling away that you feel she thinks she’s superior. Remember she thinks she now knows all the answers, she really doesn’t and is likely making a show of herself. I bet most people are eye rolling rather than lapping up her words in reality.

Bless her

Has she quit her job, told her manager to get stuffed and is walking around worry free?!

Tbh sounds great until the next round of bills are due 😂

Haha as a fellow Indian I find this hilarious too. Funny but not surprising.

It seems to happen particularly with India and I wonder why. I think, partly it's because Hinduism is such a broad church that anyone can find their home there. I also think it's partly because people coming from more affluent countries are at first shocked by the poverty and problems they see. But then they find that a lot of people irrespective of their problems are still always smiling, friendly and hospitable and it does make you wonder and re-evaluate your life and your "first world" problems.

I also just think that india tends to be so much in your face (very, very loud, very dynamic, very colourful and seemingly a billion people (and now a billion honking cars) where ever you go) that it's an onslaught to your senses and maybe that resets something in your brain. I think when faced with that a lot of people tend to turn inwards. This is not a bad thing if it leads you to really think deeply about your life and what you want from it.

However, from what you've said about dishing out advice on Instagram I suspect your friend has not found enlightenment and is not the next buddha. It might not last long.

I'd just avoid her for a while if it troubles you.

Why don't you just tell her?

When I went to India, I genuinely found that after the trip my nervous system was rock solid and nothing would phase me for a while since getting back. It was a wonderful time.
I didn't share my "wisdom" with others though... maybe I missed a golden instagram business opportunity 😂
OP, it won't last. Just ignore and find a funny side to it.

Should've started a new instagram then!

Won't work for us Indians as white people have taken all our yogi and spiritual coach jobs now... /s 😂

Don't get so wound up about it. Let her make a complete arse of herself.

I’m getting really tired of her constant preachiness and the way she’s acting superior.

Tell her exactly this and tell her to pack it in. If she doesn't, friendship over.

Ha ha. There's someone in the next village who did this years ago but seems to have actually managed to become a successful guru/cult leader. He has drawn so many people into his circle that I joke to people about the "x village cult".

He has a highly successful instagram account where he gives out his advice. He must be making a fortune because he drives really flash cars. I'm talking Mclaren, not BMW. There's a physical gaggle of them who trot round after him doing yoga and meditation and every now and then they all fuck off to Dubai for months. Why Dubai and not India I don't know. I suspect there's a load of swinging/free love involved.

I think that’s probably a very fair picture.

And yes to Buddhas Incarnate or sadhus or whatever the Hindu ascetic equivalent is not generally being all over Instagram.

It’s giving the sister(in law) from outnumbered 😂

I once new a man that went to Ireland.
And ever since he came back he was acting like he was Irish.
It was funny to watch.
And somewhat embarrassing at times.

How do you ‘act as though you are Irish’?

I voted YABU unreasonable because this person sounds hilarious. What an idiot.

I think we all know someone that’s done the exact same thing. I lived with a girl in my 20s who was not the full shilling (as in, none too bright) who came back from a three month trip espousing similar lines, like “No but you don’t understand, we’re SOOO lucky and we have so much“. Well, duh. As it happens, during my undergrad and masters degrees I spent a lot of time travelling round the Caucasus. You don’t know deprivation and hopelessness until you’ve seen post-soviet communities with an almost 100% unemployment rate and where it takes a Herculean effort just to get through the day . Krokodil (moonshine heroine) is a huge problem.

This reads like a poem. Not quite a haiku but along those lines. I love it!

How long did she go to India for? I get that she is being really annoying but it would also be hilarious if she was only there for a fortnight.

I read it the same as you! 😂

I took it to mean he put on an Irish accent.

I used to know a guy called Jamaican Al. I assumed that he was a white Jamaican but, actually, he’d never even been there. He just started speaking with a Jamaican accent as a teenager and never stopped. Pillock.

On one level that is comedic gold, but on another level it is quite worrying!

Do you think it should be reported as a cult?

It was very odd lol he went from talking in an English accent to a deep strong Irish accent.
He would only listen to Irish music.
He was only there a week 😂.
I do wonder if he ever snapped out of it.

There was a young lady of Cork,
Whose dad made a fortune in pork.
He bought for his daughter,
A tutor who taught her,
To balance her peas on her fork.

😁

Oh dear, this would really make me cringe! How embarrassing for the poor woman!

I go to India quite regularly so if she's a guru after just one trip, I reckon I must be the Buddha by now!

Haha, that was my first thought!

It sounds like your friend has 'Found Herself' OP!