I’ve never lived alone

[Cantbearsedbaking]

I’m 46, lived at home until 23, when I went to live abroad with Dh, lived with him since.
Is this a bit pathetic?
I worry in the future if I ever had to live alone, I’d find it hard, I don’t even like when he’s away, although it’s been easier since I had my Dd

Thinking about it neither have I. The short time between leaving home and having him move in, I was in three different house shares. Single but not alone iyswim. Going forward my youngest will be moving with me so I will be single again but won't be alone until she leaves the nest.

I don't think it's pathetic,but just a missed opportunity. I'm sure lots of people haven't and actually I only did for a year. Parents house, Uni for four years, parents house, my own flat, moved in with DH.

But I think it's good to be comfortable in your own company at least. Do you do stuff alone? Can you be in the house alone?

Neither have I! I think it’s quite normal. Went from parents to flatmates back to parents and then with boyfriend who became DH. I fall apart without people to keep me in check!

Well, there’s nothing you can do about that now, so focus on the future. What makes you think you’d find it hard to live alone? What is it you don’t like about your DH being away, and what can you do about it?

Never lived alone but don't mind being alone. Lived in a few houseshares before moving i with DH. He worked away for a while and often goes away for the weekend. I like having the place to myself.

Not many people I know ever lived alone. Nobody could afford to rent or buy by themselves. And I am old enough that the majority of my women friends married from their parents home then moved in with husbands.

I wonder about this sort of thing a lot. I have lived alone for decent periods of my life and will do so again when my children leave. I have friend who, for example, have never used the lawnmower or changed a plug or emptied the filter on the washing machine for the simple reason that they've always had someone else to do it. I suppose it ought to feel empowering but I'm mostly envious 😆

That should have been 'friends' plural.

I lived alone for several years before I met DH, it was ok but I wouldn't choose to

@NashvilleQueen I can’t do any of those things either

Love my own company and being alone…sometimes, but wouldn’t do well living alone and it’s the nights really-paranoid about people by breaking in etc

I lived alone for about a year when I was younger and enjoyed it. I'm not sure it would make much difference to how hard I'd find it to live alone now though. After 20 years being married I'd find it incredibly hard to adjust back to living alone.

I've never lived alone - went from home to uni then moved in with now-DH when I graduated 15 years ago - but I think I'd be fine on my own! Sure, there are things I don't know how to do, but I know how to find out or hire someone who does. Might get lonely occasionally, but I do quite like my own company.

Same here, OP. I lived at home during university as I wasn't supported in applying for anywhere apart from places that I could go to while living from home.
I got married at 20 (!) and am still married to DH - we've just celebrated our Pearl anniversary.

I do wonder what it would have been like to live alone for a while and am glad that my DD's decided to live away for uni and try it out. One loved it. One hated it and came home to get a job after year 1.

It’s not a big deal that you’ve never lived alone. Lots of people haven’t, especially people who needed roommates in order to pay the rent.

It doesn’t look like there’s a reason to think you’ll be living alone anytime soon, and if you do end up living alone, you’ll adjust. What concerns me is that you seem worried that other people are going to think you’re “pathetic,” which suggests some anxiety about how other people view you.

@YankSplaining No, just assumed majority had lived alone and not moved from parents to Dp. Quite surprised many haven’t either

Are you talking about living totally alone, or as a single person living in a flatshare so is sort of alone? Because I have never lived totally alone but I have been single and have changed fuses and lightbulbs etc. I have also done the lawn and cleaned filters (and rebuilt walls) despite being married.

I do think these are different tbh. Sometimes it is comforting to have another living creature with you, even if it's only a toddler or a dog/cat who aren't even remotely helpful.

Yep, me either. Lived at home until I got married at 27, then lived with DH. TBH, i'm not that fazed by it.

Neither have i and i'm nearly 60! I think we will manage if in that position lol! I have always managed the household finances though DH is main breadwinner. I'm pretty capable. I'm not worrying. Nor should you!

I haven't either, my DH has never even had his own bedroom.

Over 8 million people in the UK live alone. I'm one of them. It's great. (I do have a cat).

www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/ons-office-for-national-statistics-b2541473.html

I’ve lived alone and those years were the best years of my life!

My sister has never lived alone. She went from our parents to marriage. She's totally incapable practically and I don't know how she'll manage if she ends up alone. I'd never lived alone till I left my husband (but he was pretty useless). I've lived alone ever since then and there's no way I'd live with anyone again. People are all different.

I have never lived alone either. I’m 60.

I think I’d like it though.

I have been in two long term relationships: one from age 19 to 30, then a four day gap, then the next from age 30 to 56. I have now been single for four years, not quite alone as I still have one child at home but they are absent for long hours and I wfh.

I bloody love it. I suspect my life would have been happier,and my relationships healthier, if I had spent more time getting to know myself rather than focused on another person.