To think it's ridiculous how people go to pieces when they don't have their car

[orangesandlemonssaythebellsofstclements]

This might be unpopular.

Being able to drive and having a car to get around seems to be a sign that you have your shit together and you are a proper adult.

However, I have witnessed so many times people that are used to cars, absolutely failing to cope the minute they no longer have access to one, even if it's just for a day. Where as people who use public transport frequently have to plan around last minute cancellations and lateness and are actually required to be more organised.

A couple of examples.

SIL (BIL's wife) had a company car for years. She now doesn't work enough hours to have it so she lost her company car. I made what I thought was a genuine and helpful comment about the fact that she's lucky she lives on a great bus route and got given looks of disgust and no-one even answered me. It was as though they thought I was deliberately trying to be factious or something. Now MIL comes and takes her on days out with her toddler and even takes her shopping because she no longer has a car and claims she can't get anywhere. I have two children and have always managed days out and shopping with out one.

Someone once called in to work and said they were going to be late because their car had broken down and they had to get a bus. There was an out pouring of sympathy for her, people were calling her every few minutes to check she was OK and making jokes about how horrible it must be for her. She turned up at the office a whole hour late, was hailed as some sort of hero for getting there and told not to worry if she had to be late for the rest of the week while she got her car sorted. I lived on the next street over and got there on the bus every single day.

AIBU to think these people kind of need to grow up a little bit and handle their shit?

Abso-bloody-lutely.

And I think your point about google being readily available is so important. The information is right there. Some people do not even realise you can switch directions on google maps between walking, cycling, and public transport! they just keep it on driving mode all the time!

And my SIL, I would have told her all the bus routes and helped her out, I offered to walk from my street to the bus stop near my colleague and get the bus with her. They simply didn't want to know.

And that's cool, but don't tell me that buses are for people who have failed at life if you can't even handle waiting at a bus stop.

I'm not sure why it needs to be one or the other? you can deal with a problem while waiting for a solution can you not?
I would use the laundrette while I was waiting for the washing machine to be repaired or for my new one to arrive. I have even managed to use a laundrette without a car (albeit with difficulty) there is also a local laundry lady who collects washing for people, washes it, dries it and drops it off all folded in her lovely little pink van and for a very reasonable price. I have used her in the past when my washing machine broke and I found out about this lady by... y'know... googling what was available to me. I certainly didn't sit there doing nothing while my washing piled up and I had nothing to wear, would you? And yes I work full time and have tow kids to get to school too.
And maybe there IS no other laundry service available but the people I describe in my OP do have options. They just refuse to use them. Hence my gripe.

Op I think you have a chip on your shoulder. If it all bothered you so much and you think you're social standing is less than someone that drives which is what I'm picking up from your posts, plus you earn well, do your driving lessons. Then you too can look down your noses at the bus wankers. I like having a car it means I can take my kids places whenever I like and gives them freedom. I'll be paying for both mine to learn to drive soon as they are old enough.

Why would I look down my nose at "bus wankers?"

Wow, bus wankers, you have an inflated opinion of yourself clearly.

Im guessing no one has watched inbetweeners.

Think the only person with an inflated opinion is op that she can use public transport and a launderette and has amazing problem solving skills that her sil doesn't.

Nope I've definitely watched the inbetweeners.

Do you look down your nose at bus wankers?

That would be like suddenly losing permanent use of your washing machine and someone saying "At least you live near a launderette"...

Always. Sometimes I even shout it a people at bus stops.

I genuinely think this is a reasonable and rather helpful thing to say though.

And yes I know lots of people use laundrettes and that there is nothing wrong with them, but if you are not accustomed to doing your laundry that way, it could be challenging.

Try living here, driving isn't a luxury, it's a necessity.

I'm glad you managed on your holiday with our two hourly busses that are often late, don't run on Sundays & don't run after 6pm. It's a service that's next to useless for anything practical. You might be able to get to your job but if it finishes after 6, you can't get home. You can't work on a Sunday at all.

Early hospital appointment? You can't get there.
Need to get to a mandated job seeker appointment thing early? Can't get there.
Need to get to parents evening at your kids school? Nope, you ain't going.
Want to take your kids swimming? Nah

So you drive, cos you have to. And in season it takes twice as long cos you spend miles stuck behind cyclists going 4mph up the hills on narrow 60mph roads with no safe opportunities to pass them thanks to endless blind bends & hairpin corners.

I'm sure it could be, but you've got no washing machine now.. so what are you going to do? just have dirty clothes? get your MIL to wash it all for you? No, you're going to have to use the facilities available to you aren't you?
And I genuinely can't think that someone pointing out that its a good thing you live near one is such a bad thing??

There are lots of things I simply couldn't do without my car.

We don't all live in areas with adequate public transport.

Well strike me down with a feather... Clever......OP..... Absolutely fabulous idea of yours and may it sail well. Meanwhile, back at the ranch, where public transport doesn't go with the flow, geesucks some dumbwits just need ter get in ther darn cars to ern some money stuff.

Happy to be corrected from any direction.

I KNOW!!!!

Urgh I'm going to sleep. You people drive me mad 😆🚗

At least you're being driven somewhere

"you people" - your imaginary homogeneous mass. You do realize that MN is virtually Luddite compared to everything else? Maybe you do.

Public transport is full of allergy triggers. It isn’t a safe option for everyone.

Omg 😄 🤦‍♀️

"I can't go on the bus, it triggers my allergies"

When did we as a nation become such a bunch of wet blankets?

Actually I do understand your point, I can't drive, and I am far from a fully functioning adult lol but I am not allowed a license due to medical issues. I have had conversations with other Scout leaders at training and events that start with "oh how are you getting home" to which my answer is always "the same way I got here". Rain literally makes some of them insane, they seem convinced that rain will cause me and the kids to melt.

Camp drives me nuts because the Explorer leaders don't understand why I have no desire to speak to parents I don't know to ask them to take my child somewhere. We used a taxi for a local camp, we used a train and a bus for another one.

Although certain adults in our life could probably benefit from the "travel training" my oldest received during his college course. It was on the life skills checklist, to be able to travel independently including purchasing tickets and requesting the correct stop (although he has a card he can hand the driver to request a reminder at the correct stop). He can manage most journeys with Google Maps assistance, or one of us accompanying him, new journeys are harder.

I live 0.9 miles from work, it takes 10-15 minutes to walk. My colleague lives on the road behind and drives. The public transport here is excellent, so I didn't have a car at all for 10 years.

I agree plenty of people have lived sheltered lives and don't necessarily have much interest in trying new things. It is normal to need a bit of time to adjust to a new situation though!