To discourage DD for a career in performing arts

[Masteringlife]

DD said she wants to go to a performing Sixth form; wants to be an actress, doesn’t want the normal office job of sitting in an office in front of a laptop all day.

I am in two minds whether to support or discourage it. It is a very competitive world and quite difficult to make a living. Perhaps encourage it as a hobby with another career on the side.

She is not ver academic and prefer creative activities and freedom.

Would be grateful for advice

I disagree.

i don’t think it’s necessarily about being “exceptionally” talented, it’s about having the right look, being in the right place at the right time, in front of the right director, for the right project.

there are a lot of exceptionally talented people out there who never get that break. There’s also a lot of averagely talented people who get that perfect storm and end up with a decent career.

@Howmanyusernames123and how many celebretiws get roles in the west end without musical theater training?

Don't put your daughter on the stage, Mrs. Worthington
Don't put your daughter on the stage
The profession is overcrowded
And the struggle's pretty tough
And admitting the fact
She's burning to act
That isn't quite enough
She has nice hands
Give the wretched girl her due
But don't you think her bust is too
Developed for her age?
I repeat, Mrs. Worthington
Sweet Mrs. Worthington
Don't put your daughter on the stage

Regarding yours
Dear Mrs. Worthington
Of Wednesday the twenty-third
Although your baby
May be keen on a stage career
How can I make it clear
This is not a good idea?
For her to hope
Dear Mrs. Worthington
Is, on the face of it, absurd
Her personality
Is not, in reality
Exciting enough
Inviting enough
For this particular sphere

Don't put your daughter on the stage, Mrs. Worthington
Don't put your daughter on the stage
She's a bit of an ugly duckling
You must honestly confess
And the width of her seat
Would surely defeat
Her chances of success
It's a loud voice
And though it's not exactly flat
She'll need a little more than that
To earn a living wage
On my knees, Mrs. Worthington
Please, Mrs. Worthington
Don't put your daughter on the stage!

Don't put your daughter on the stage, Mrs. Worthington
Don't put your daughter on the stage
Though they said at the school of acting
She was lovely as Peer Gynt
I'm afraid on the whole
An ingénue role
Would emphasize her squint
She's a big girl
And though her teeth are fairly good
She's not the type I ever would
Be eager to engage
No more buts, Mrs. Worthington!
Nuts, Mrs. Worthington!
Don't put your daughter on the stage!

She did her sixth form at Read College which sadly no longer exists.
She graduated last July, but was already teaching in the summer term. She did a three month contract at Christmas in Finnish Lapland, her jobs had used temporary cover whilst she was gone and now she is back in the work/audition grid.
She is flying to Holland for a cruise audition next week.
You do need talent, but she was consistently told at college that it is talent that gets you the first job it is being a hard worker that keeps you working. The examples that she was given were Sam Tutty, Layton Williams and Hannah Lowther were not the most talented in their years, but they were the hardest workers.
MT is hard in addition to working and attending auditions, she attends dance classes and has singing lessons. Plus going to the gym to keep fit and strong enough to do her job.

As a new graduate there is a lot of queuing in Mayfair or Seven dials at 5am.

The auditions are brutal a little while ago DD queued from 5 am in Mayfair she was eventually seen at 3pm she didn’t to single her full 2 minute cut of her song.
She films multi self tapes sends them off in to the ether never to hear anything.

Ahh Read - such a heartbreak when it suddenly closed.

Here is my take on it - there are acting/ performing adjacent jobs. And opportunities on cruises and panto time.

I have been a drama teacher for 23 years. Lots I have taught have gone on to study drama/acting from the mainstream school into specific drama schools.

However the the numbers who went on to have a career in the west end and films - 3. In 23 years!!!

And even those guys have had supplement their income with non-acting work.

Also interestingly, none of them followed the drama school route, one was a model, one was a dancer who got spotted and put in a soap, and one went to an open audition (and his singing voice is amazing). Also, all three are male.

There are just so many young female students who I have taught with incredible triple threat talent and they couldn’t get a break.

And that’s the brutal truth. Go for it while you are young but it’s down to right face in the right place or the connections you have.

As above. A useful tip is to look at who is being cast in the west end and touring productions. How many are 23 year old women? Not many! Any?! They are looking for older, a wide range of looks and talents. A quirky looking man with an amazing voice is more likely to get work. But as parents who are we to rain on their parade - they will work out how to work in other ways alongside

Don't do that OP. It is her life and her choice.

Instead support her so she can develop resilience, a good work ethics and self confidence which will help her in whatever career she chooses to follow.

Thank you. This is great advice.

I mean, there is a huge middle ground between actress and office job surely?

I do agree that she should follow her dreams but I am not sure why you think the only alternative to acting is a boring office job 😂

I don’t think DD realises this; but I think she has to make her own mistakes and learn from it. Have a go, otherwise she may regret it.

It sounds like your daughter is very committed.

What is in Mayfair by the way? How do they enter those auditions? 🙈

Does your daughter have an agent or do it themselves?

out of interest, do any of you more knowledgeable people know why west end contracts are only a year, maybe two, long?

my neighbours kid did the whole MT route, it seems to me that most of them with longer careers rotate around shows. So a year in Les Mis, then a year in Priscilla, etc.

it is a contract issue? If they do more than a year certain rights/benefits kick in or something?

neighbours kid did book a west end gig straight out of drama school. Did a year and has never had a job since other than extra work. I don’t get why they didn’t keep him on if he had no other job to go to?

The people I know who did this one is now a teacher and the other a chef. I'd let her run with it, on the caveat she's talented, as she might make a success of it, or find it leads her down other paths. I wouldn't allow it, if she's not talented though. It is very competitive. The one who's a teacher is/ was super talented, the other less so (and if truth be told was never going to make it, and smoked far too much weed during her performing arts college years and I don't think it was good for her mental health).

My daughter has wanted to be an actress since 3years old. We could never squash her dream. Though she’s always been realistic knowing she’ll be poor first 🤣 she finished a 2 year advanced diploma of stage and film last year. She’s got a dual country agent who picked her up and has a few auditions. It’s not easy but if it’s what they love they just keep pushing, she currently does kids parties and can now make balloon animals 🤣 but she can make $130 an hour which is great. She’s also now in with a director who wanted to use our car for a commercial (we were trying to sell it) which is so bizarre I said something has to come from it t!

My youngest DD did performing arts. She went to university and did a degree in theatre studies. She absolutely loved it and did consider joining cruise ships or acting but when she saw how small the pool of jobs was she decided not to. She now works for a cancer charity, but her degree has been excellent in helping her to know how to present herself, how to deal with the public, how to 'put on an act' to carry out her job well.

She's single but has managed to buy herself a house. She's well paid for what she does. So I would say that no experience, of any kind, is ever wasted.

For what it's worth, younger DS did drama all through school, and took Drama GCSE/ He's now an accountant, but it's helped him with self confidence and public speaking (which he tends to do quite a lot of. He would like to become a local councillor)

I've not read all the comments, but if she wants to go to a performing arts 6th form, at the very least she will need to be doing a dance class once a week, singing (choir or lessons) and acting classes (and probably have been doing that for the last few years). She will need to apply and audition for a place. If she's not currently doing those things, then it's unlikely she'd have the experience required to complete 2 years with others who will have been doing performing arts from a young age.

If you think she's got the ability / determination, what's the harm in allowing her to try it out? She may not end up with a career in performing arts but it doesn't stop her from changing pathways / careers at a later stage.

Quite a lot of young people from my DD's performing arts school have gone on to work on cruise ships, in smaller productions touring the UK, and at places like Disney. But these are all short term contracts, so there's not a lot of security but I bet they're having an amazing time!

Appreciate that this is your experience, but as someone who worked in westend and touring theatre for 11 years as a stage manager, most of my friends who made it as far as drama school are still working as actors. The work might not be consistent and they do smaller gigs like voice work, stock photos, instructional videos and classes to fill the gaps, but they are least working in what they trained to do.

OP - it's hard. there's no beating around that bush! If my daughter turned around and said she wanted to be an actress I don't think I'd know what to think. I've seen alot of people make it but I've also seen the struggles of having to bust a gut as a london bar tender because you've got 3 months until your next tour.

My advice would be for her to pick up as much acting as possible outside of school productions. Classes, am dram, local youth drama schools. If she has a passion for it where she honestly can't think of anything else she'd be doing...then she might have a chance. But if she doesn't have the gumption to even do stuff outside of a school production, it might not be for her.

Also, to echo what some-one else said....if she's only doing it because she doesn't want a normal 9-5 she's sorely mistaken. If anything it's worse because you have to rely on zero hours contracts waitressing and other small job to make ends meet...least with the 'boring 9-5' theres consitency!

Dance Works studios are in Mayfair many auditions are held there.
She has self repped and had an agent.

She might not make a career in acting but doing a degree in drama was the making of my niece. She works in a different industry now but the confidence she gained from her course was invaluable. And she still finds an outlet for her creative side in her hobbies.

@Masteringlifelast week on Hannah Lowther’s podcast, How very Hannah, she interviewed her social media/podcast agent who is an MT grad too and they discussed the transferable skills that the degree gives you and the different roles that their friends went in to.
I think long term my DD might end up on the production side as she is slightly too type A to thrive long term as a performer, but she has always expressed an interest in an MSc in direction. Her ideal situation would be to get a role as an on stage resident director on a tour or cruise to try her hand at direction - when she directed stuff at sixth form and in her degree she always got really great feedback from both her colleagues and her lecturers about how organised she was and how everyone always knew what was expected of them. She was the vocal captain in her final year production at Conti which gave her a real taste of leading a production. She has been described as a musical directors dream as once she has it vocally she can reproduce the piece identically over and over again.