Skinny shaming is so accepted

[chickenbhunalambbhunaprawnbhunamuchroomrice]

I know a lot of people will disagree with me on this, but skinny shaming is so wildly accepted and tolerated due to slim people being at an advantage due to their body size. As if it's acceptable, because they're slim. I've been body shamed my whole life for being slim. Right from when I was at junior school, to now at 30 years old.

I was relentlessly bullied at school and college. I am not an anomaly, I am a 5'5 size 6-8 female with a normal BMI. I don't need to be shamed about my body. The only people who have ever shamed or bullied me about my weight have been fat or obese people. And I'll be honest I'm trying my hardest not to judge them for their eating habits and size, but when it's a running theme I am starting to think that only fat people have a problem with slim people.

'Skinny privilege' shouldn't be an excuse to exempt bullying and shameful behaviour.
Stop trying to normalise skinny shaming just because it's the 'more desirable' image. It's not our fault that agenda has been pushed so much.

AIBU to think that skinny shaming is just as bad as fat shaming, and that slim people aren't to an advantage on this? I don't believe in the whole 'well at least you're skinny and being shamed.' Interested to know others thoughts.

Bummer isn't it. Not that I was ever a one for figure hugging dresses, but starting to look like I swallowed a tyre...

The bullies and the things they have said to you (exception being the gymnastics comment perhaps, you do need a fair degree of muscle for that, if you don't have that, that might be a fair comment!) are not acceptable.

However..

Have you been dismissed over medical concerns and told to go and alter your weight, when that medical concern is nothing to do with your weight?

Has anyone ever assumed that you must smell or be a lazy person with no self control due to your weight?

Have you had people spit at you in the street or scream abuse out of car windows at you because of your weight?

I very much doubt it. The issues that fat people experience with fat shaming go much much further - we're treated with disgust, not sympathy. We're blamed for it, the default attitude is, 'its your fault' whereas the default for the majority of skinny comments is 'it's not their fault/they can't help it/something is wrong, they need help'.

No one should be bullied or shamed, but trying to compare the two isn't really on either.

Standard lenses on phone cameras, which pp points out are configured as wide angle lenses do distort body and face shape, particularly when used as a portrait or full length portrait lens because of their distortion.

Actual portrait lenses have a higher focal length and tend towards a flat picture thus don't have this effect.

Camera adds 10 pounds is a commonly understood phrase relating to this effect, although I'd side eye anyone using it the way OP is.

Nope.

It's a fact.

Because people are more likely to be overnight or obese, those who are jot are more likely to fall prey to the insecurities of those who are overweight.

It really isn’t a fact.

People who think skinny shaming doesn't exist and that skinny is a privilege are thinking only of the 'right' type of slim woman. Tiny, fragile, doll like and considered attractive, subject to no worse than the occasional barbed comment about eating half a donut from people who are likely jealous. They are overlooking the thin women who's bodies are not considered mainstream attractive, who are called names, told they look ill, that they need to 'fix themselves' by eating more and so on. My close friend spent her youth in this category and suffered every bit of the insecurities, bullying and insults experienced by OW people. Whatever your body size being made to feel ashamed of it is equally bad.

YABU. This is like a rich person whinging about their issues and expecting sympathy from the poor. Yeah it’s shit that you get a few negative comments here and there, but everyone gets negativity about something. Being skinny is an ideal. Just grow a thicker skin and be happy you have first world problems

I think you're totally right, but also that the OP has put herself in the first category you mention and not the second. She's said plenty of times that she's a healthy size 8 and she's talking about the shaming of slim, attractive women by fat women who are jealous.

Oh look, my reply got deleted. How predictable 🥱

Might have something to do with your bullshit, no?

It was a fair observation of your comment.

First world problems? Holyyyyy cow you have no idea love.

@Allfur

It's not bollocks, actually. Have a look online for yourself.

I was shocked to hear a friend describe a group of women as skinny bitches. Can you imagine the reaction if someone described overweight women like that. Not nice.

No one has to imagine it - fat women get called fat bitches all the time!

Would you tell an overweight person that their concerns over their weight, shape and how others shame them that it is a first world problem? Unlikely. This thread is unreal.

Well, I think that poster's view is that it would be different telling an overweight person that because of the social difference of being fat vs being thin - but even so, that view isn't widely represented on the thread. It's been said a few times by a few people but there is a really wide range of contributions which cover a lot of takes on this whole discussion, and it's been rebutted a lot.

The point is you can be thin or shaped in a way that isn’t fat but also not to the beauty standards and that attracts bullying. Be honest everyone knows this there is only one main aspirational shape in this era and that’s a toned, tanned but still ever so slightly jiggly body with C-D cup boobs and hourglass hips in proportion with each other, with a peachy rounded bum and a flat tummy. Hardly any women look like this naturally. So those who have flat bums, flat boobs, no hour glass shape or too many muscles and any visible bones or lumps in the wrong areas are not looked upon as particularly socially acceptable either now it’s not the 90’s. I don’t think it’s hard to imagine

You can’t compare rich with poor either if they are what people naturally look like in terms of genetics. No one is naturally rich or naturally poor or genetically predisposed financially

Totally true @thelever but again, not what the OP was getting at. The first post isn't about slim women being shamed and feeling bad that they don't meet beauty standards, it's about slim women being shamed by fat women who are jealous that they do meet society's beauty standards.

And wealth isn't genetic but it's certainly inherited (or not!) so it still comes down, in most people's lives, to being born lucky or otherwise. * *

Not at all.

Your and that person's refusal to accept that some of us who have lived as obese or underweight and received more abuse as the latter, is not bullshit.

You have not experienced it but many of us have.

I can believe it's true for one person @SpudleyLass but it's patently not true across society and not reflective of the way in which fat people are generally viewed. The idea of obese privilege will strike most people as completely absurd and quite easily disproven. It's an unusual experience to have received more prejudice as a thin person than an obese one and so won't reflect most people's experience of the world.

No, fuck off. Its true for a lot of slim women,

Those who are overweight - which I am right now, btw - are not willing to accept that many like them are indeed abusive, out of jealousy, to those who are slimmer.

I have no sympathy for those like me who then bitch about abuse they receive back.

Stop it. It doesn't matter what ''privilege'' is. Stop abusing people no matter what your own situation is. For fucks sake.

I stand by what I said.

Every time I've been obese, people have gone mute on commenting on my body. As soon as I lose weight, however....