Would you find this comment rude?

[Winterrush]

I went to a family event on Saturday and my younger cousin (22) made a comment that I thought was rude, but maybe I'm just being sensitive. Please let me know your thoughts.

For context, I had a rubbish time in school, I was bullied for years and ended up bunking off half the time. I don't even remember taking any exams but I must have and obviously didn't get very good grades. I chose not to go to college/university and went straight into a full time job instead. I've always worked and been sensible with money/saved up for things and supported myself without any family help.

My cousin is very intelligent, good grades in school and is currently in university. She worked part time for a couple of months last year but apart from that her parents have supported her financially. Holidays, clothes, phones, driving lessons and they bought her a car when she passed her test. She's spoilt (her mother's words, not mine).

Anyway, I own a 10 year old BMW that wasn't expensive (compared to what a lot of people pay for cars nowadays) but as the previous owner modified it and had it wrapped it does look newer. She must have seen my car and said to me "How is it that I went to school and got grades, yet you're the one driving round in a BMW". She caught me off guard so I didn't say anything, but wish I'd said "because I work". So because I didn't get good grades in school I can't have anything nice, that's how I took it anyway.

Would this piss you off?

No.

Tone is everything. From one of my cousins, I’d have taken that as a jokey compliment.

She's academically smart but emotionally dim. Take no notice, most people talk occasional shite when young.

I agree tone is everything, I can see how it might upset you.
Are you particularly sensitive about your education experience? I can understand how you would be, but you may be extra sensitive here.

@Pocketlint What a nasty comment.

I’d think it was a clumsy attempt at a compliment.

@pinkyredrose yes that's true, I should probably just ignore her.

@Pocketlint thanks 😅 I suppose it's a good job that you're not driving it then 😊

It was honest and thoughtless but not rude. It's also pretty small in the scheme of things, let it go!

She sounds like an arsehole with no people skills. She needs to grow up but you def should have stuck up for yourself

Yes!
It would have pissed me off !!
It's rude and she's jealous.
Jealous people are dangerous

What a weird thing to say.

She obviously is jealous of your car.

I'm trying very hard to put a positive slant on it: was it a compliment that you have an upmarket car?

Actually it isn't very pleasant as it does sound as though she thinks you have a car that is too up market for your station in life.

I wouldn't worry about it. Given what you have said about her privileged up bringing she can't have much knowledge of the value of hard work and its ability to give you rewards in life.

Well done you for not letting lack of qualifications stand in your way of achieving a decent life for yourself.

@ThanksHunPenneys I don't think I'm sensitive about it, but looking back I wish I'd done better for myself... hindsight!

Although I've managed to buy a house, car and take care of myself since leaving home 9 years ago so I can't be doing too bad I guess.

she sounds a bit of an idiot.

shes 22, she’s had a very easy ride so far. Good grades don’t guarantee a good job. Even if she does get a good graduate job her lack of people skills may hold her back.

I’d smile at her say nothing.

Nah, wouldnt bother me.

I'd find that incredibly rude.

@Pocketlint thank you! It's vinyl but I plan to have it taken off soon as it's been on a few years now (currently wrapped in Nardo Grey I believe) but is black underneath so I want it all blacked out. My mum says it's like a drug dealers car 🤣 I can assure you I do not sell or take drugs though and I'm a nice driver haha. I love it and enjoy driving it 😁

You should be incredibly proud of yourself 💐

@ThanksHunPenneys thank you so much xx

Yep, what a snarky little cow!

My brother in law makes similar comments to this all the time. My man drives a jaguar, it’s very nice and cost around £9000. Brother in law makes comments like ‘why don’t you just buy a bog standard basic car like Prisonbreak?’
my bog standard basic was is almost 3 x the cost of the jaguar (financed) but it doesn’t look as sporty. People don’t know what they are talking about.

Your cousin was tactless and rude

Possibly on purpose, possibly just insensitive

Wow you sound lovely.