My non swimming child went under during swimming lesson

[Mamabear256]

DS is 4.5 years old and has just started swimming lessons, stage 1 at his local leisure centre. It’s 8 children per class, one instructor and a lifeguard watching 2 classes in the pool.

He’s naturally quite a shy reserved boy and he doesn’t like going under water, he doesn't love going but he does need to learn to swim.

Last week he had a trial, whereby he used floats the whole time. However yesterday, the first thing the instructor got to do was all of the children to doggy paddle across the width of the pool (a small-ish pool) without any aids or support. The instructor was standing a few metres in front whilst all 8 children doggy paddled at the same time. DS can barely touch the floor and he doesn’t even know what a doggy paddle is. It was inevitable he was going to go under, and he did. The instructor wasn’t too near my DS so I started to run around to get him. After a few seconds one of the mums shouted towards me ‘it’s ok he’s back up!’ I looked and the instructor had him.

Now I genuinely do not believe he should have been asked to do that without any floats. If the children went one by one doing it with the teacher next to them then I get that. But not all 8 at the same time, with the instructor not close to him, and especially as he is a non swimmer and can barely touch the floor.

I want to complain but just wanted to check if this is normal or not.

AIBU in thinking this isn’t right and to complain?

And if he's at that level he shouldn't be in a stage one class

I personally think starting swimming lessons so young is going to involve situations like this.

I never had any swimming lessons, just fannied around with arm bands enjoying water.

Aged 9 we went swimming in the holidays and I was like dam I am going to get this and I taught myself how to doggy paddle and swim from there.

I absolutely love swimming and would go 2-3 times a week as an adult. I'm going in about 30 mins. I do get why parents want to start them young especially if they didn't learn to swim. I just think it's more about time in the water. Lessons can actually be off putting and if your child doesn't master swimming before the age of asserting themselves about not wanting to go swimming then it's not really helped. Its more about finding the love of water.

Appreciate that's quite a drastic view though.

No, I wouldn’t like this at all - you are not over-reacting. What would the instructor do if all 8 children went under at once?
Safety aside, something like that could destroy a child’s confidence and make them never want to get in a pool again.

Are stage 1 classes different in England or something?

The requirements for Level 1 here are: age 4 and ideally at school, toilet trained, and able to listen to the teacher. The whole point of level 1 is getting them familiar with the water, blowing bubbles, learning how to be safe, kicking legs with a noodle, practising arm strokes while walking, floating with the teacher supporting. They're eons from swimming in a group with no float.

I agree 8 is too many, it's not clear if OP DC could reach the floor or not.

He's barely been swimming op, I'd take him out of lessons and just go swimming with him for fun weekly for 6 months to build up some water confidence then try again.

I don't think that was safe at all. I have 3 children who have been through swimming lessons and the norm would be get them swimming confidently with arm bands then take them off one child at a time as they are ready to try to swim across. They did always have the early staged lessons in the deep end though. I dread to think what would have happened if more than one child had gone under

Yep, all of this was/is the same for my kids. 2 kids swimming at a time (maximum) and a noodle initially.

If you can swim, I’d suggest taking him swimming yourself as well, say once a week, staying in the shallow end and close to him, perhaps with a hand under his tummy at first while he tries. But no armbands, children will find it a lot harder to learn with those things on.

Have swimming teaching methods changed in the last 30 years? When my (now adult) children learnt to swim, the first thing they did was stand at the side, holding on to the bar, and practice putting their head in the water blowing bubbles, kicking their legs etc. Then they did games holding hands in a ring, learning to bounce up and down in the water, deal with splashing, and generally get a feel for being in the pool. They didn't start actual swimming technique until they were confident in the water. Mine would have howled the place down if they'd gone under before they were ready for it, and before they had the skills and confidence to get themselves back upright without panic. OP, I would definitely talk to the instructor, and if you're not happy, either find another class, take him yourself and just play in the water for a bit, or leave it until he's a couple of years older.

Sorry that happened to him - it’s so dangerous and can be very distressing. A similar thing happened to my son a little while ago at the same age; one difference being that the pool was very deep and he couldn’t touch the bottom at all. In his case he’s been to swimming since he was a baby, but he let go of the side while the instructor was with another child and wasn’t noticed. My feeling was that the class was too full, and that was with six kids. So I moved him to a much more inconvenient time where the class was quieter! It took a few weeks of encouragement to build up his confidence again but he’s fine now.

I don’t think any swimming lesson would have a child of that age using wearable floats, but they should absolutely be mindful of their ability and use noodles and hand held floats for support. If it feels wrong, trust your instinct. If he’s brand new to swimming and now a bit nervous, check out one of those intensive courses over half term where they swim for 30 mins every day. Or do one to one for a bit to get him up to speed. Good luck, swimming should be fun and is so important!

In my area (Hertfordshire) kids can start stage 1 at 3 years old. Everything else you’ve said sounds like my kids lessons.

The instructor will be trained and following a clear lesson plan outline. There is a lifegaurd at the poolside and the instructor is in the water with them.

They could stand up!

Kids hold their breath when they go under!

They teach children to swim using front crawl and breaststroke which requires them to go under the water so they need to get used to it quickly.

Why send them to lessons if you think you know when floats should be removed better than the teacher does?

1 to 8 is a large class for complete beginners. Is this a community pool?

We started with a private company who hired a jnr school pool at the weekends. Class size was four kids, one teacher (in the pool) and one helper, so ratio of 1:2 for supervision. They were lovely and a number of nervous beginners were putting their faces in the water happily within weeks and the teachers really applauded them for it.

They're double the price of the community type pool lessons, but once they've gained their confidence and mastered the basics, you can always move them back to the larger lessons. I find they are very clinical and impersonal up-down the pool in comparison but that's fine once they're just improving stamina and technique.

What would the instructor have done if two of the eight kids went under at the same time?

I think it’s really early to have lessons personally. DS1 had lessons from that age and I ended up paying for years of lessons where most of the time was waiting around and watching others swim with the instructor and little progress. With DS2 I just took him to the pool to play a lot and get confident in water myself and then at the age of 8 I paid for a summer crash course which was expensive, but a lot cheaper than wasting money on lessons for years for the same result.

I think this is a good point, from reading this thread I think that people have vastly different experiences of what a stage 1 lesson looks like.

For us they have to have started school. There is about 8 kids in a class and the instructor only gets in the pool if there is a new child who is completely terrified of being in the water, otherwise they stand on the side. Usually about 5 different stage classes in the pool, each with their own instructor on the side, and 1 lifeguard. In stage one an average lesson is jumping/walking through the pool, fetching sink toys, practicing strokes with noodles/floats, pushing off from the side, floating in the water (no floating aide), attempting swimming without floats and jumping in from the side. They are taught to put their face in the water and blow bubbles whilst practicing swimming strokes.

The kind of things that a lot of people on this thread are describing for a stage 1 swimming lesson are the sort of things my dc were doing at ducklings (toddler) swimming lessons.

Learning to swim with floats is a waste of time - the body responds completely differently in water when it has floats on it. It's well worth finding someone with a Halliwick Instructors Certificate, as they teach children and adults to swim with no floats at all.

The first lesson will be about getting used to floating on your back and breath control -once you have mastered those, then 'going under' holds no fear, and it also means your child won't drown if they fall into water, because they can get onto their backs and float until they are rescued.

Future lessons get you used to rolling in all directions, and then eventually you learn the strokes - which is easy by then, because of your familiarity with the water.

@BarbaraHoward he's in lessons to learn to swim not to get used to getting a bit of water in his face. Whilst obviously lessons build water confidence, I would say just being in the water, putting your face in etc are pre levelled swimming lessons. That stuff is done in baby swimming sessions and/or by parents.

What the OP will probably find is that he'll stay at that level for many terms because he is actually 'pre' lesson standard. Then she'll moan he isn't getting better and it's costing too much and is boring and he's moaning about going, then she'll find he's now 9 with 5 year olds in his group.

As parents we are supposed to prepare our children for things. The problem these days is that parents don't take responsibility and blame someone else for their lack of parenting.

Some really patronising comments on here (no surprise). 4.5 is a completely normal age to start swimming lessons. I started at five and ended up swimming for my county. Well done OP for taking him. It’s the most important thing you can do for your child. Despite being a good swimmer I found my kid swimming lessons stressful. I just kept going on until they enjoyed it (which took a long time!).

Babies have a diving reflex so it is a bit different if you can afford baby swimming lessons (lots can’t) and they go under. (Personally I didn’t like the idea of this anyway, I know others disagree and it’s the law of extortionate baby swimming classes that they do along with an expensive underwater photo but no thanks).

A older child going under in their first lesson doing doggy paddle is if nothing else majorly off putting for the child. And IMO eight stage 1 kids swimming doggy paddle is a lot to keep track of. I would probably look for another smaller class. Not all swimming teachers are good ones. Go with your gut instinct. But keep taking him. And I agree about taking him fun swimming yourself more to build up his confidence.

Like many are saying he's just not ready for lessons yet. Don't worry about it just take him out and go swimming at weekend instead and make it fun. Rejoin in a few years.

Possibly need to get some more information about how the lessons work. This way you and your son may feel more confident.
However it maybe that these lessons just won't work for you.
We pay (highly) for max 3:1 ratio for both my children. Much better approach as teacher can adapt to each child's individual needs.

She is taking responsibility though - he's in a beginner's swimming class at a very normal age to begin swimming lessons. He's just been asked to run before he can walk.

The curriculum for the preschool lessons and stage 1 is the same. If children have done the preschool lessons they will progress faster in stage 1 or maybe go straight to stage 2 once they get to school age. You can't actually learn to swim without going through the same basic steps. Older kids will learn quicker as they're stronger, more confident, better at following instructions. But any beginner class curriculum will include getting your face wet with support, getting in and out safely etc.

OP is taking responsibility, she is taking her son to swimming classes at age four. People are so snooty about swimming lessons and age. Some kids don’t take classes at all, ever but OP is taking him.

No, keep taking him - four is the ideal age to start.