My non swimming child went under during swimming lesson

[Mamabear256]

DS is 4.5 years old and has just started swimming lessons, stage 1 at his local leisure centre. It’s 8 children per class, one instructor and a lifeguard watching 2 classes in the pool.

He’s naturally quite a shy reserved boy and he doesn’t like going under water, he doesn't love going but he does need to learn to swim.

Last week he had a trial, whereby he used floats the whole time. However yesterday, the first thing the instructor got to do was all of the children to doggy paddle across the width of the pool (a small-ish pool) without any aids or support. The instructor was standing a few metres in front whilst all 8 children doggy paddled at the same time. DS can barely touch the floor and he doesn’t even know what a doggy paddle is. It was inevitable he was going to go under, and he did. The instructor wasn’t too near my DS so I started to run around to get him. After a few seconds one of the mums shouted towards me ‘it’s ok he’s back up!’ I looked and the instructor had him.

Now I genuinely do not believe he should have been asked to do that without any floats. If the children went one by one doing it with the teacher next to them then I get that. But not all 8 at the same time, with the instructor not close to him, and especially as he is a non swimmer and can barely touch the floor.

I want to complain but just wanted to check if this is normal or not.

AIBU in thinking this isn’t right and to complain?

My son had a terrible fear of water so I held off until he was a little bit older (straight into stage 2) and took him weekly beforehand to get him used to being without floats. Floats are discouraged in general OP, it gives the child a false sense of security of which I was unaware at the time.
I would have hated seeing what you did too with my little one and to be honest going under was why my son became fearful in the first place. If your son continued the lesson until the end after what happened, fantastic, because it likely didn’t scare him as much as it did you. But it would probably put me off the classes if I’m honest.

I'd suggest to try and find new swimming lessons. My DC have both learned at one where they swim in armbands, as they get better they reduce the air in them until they don't need them anymore. We tried lots of different ones until we found this one and although it's old school I find it so much better than the others where they don't have a float or anything. Only thing id say is it takes a long time. 8 is too many for children to learn at once who all can't swim!

I'm finding this thread so bizarre.
In my daughter's swim class when they were absolutely beginners they swam 1 or 2 at a time, never 8.
How can you learn doggy paddle by doing it when you don't even know what it is ?
At my daughter's class they used a noodle initially .

I don't think you're overreacting op.

He is going to go under, he's learning to swim! I think the biggest danger is your reaction here, if your ds picks up on it he will learn to be nervous of the water

Going under is normal. If you're not comfortable with the group setting you need to pay for 1:1.

I didn’t like the set up of the group lessons so changed it to private one on one lessons. Is this a possibility for you?

8:1 is a big group and I'd expect he'll make very slow progress like that in any case. Personally I'd look for a smaller group class

If you can't afford 1:1 for a while do look for 1:2 or 1:3. There's nothing wrong with 1:8 but you seem very stressed by a perfectly normal aspect of learning to swim.

arm bands are the devil's work.

This!

How will this increase this child’s ability to swim? Four and a half is pretty old to be unable to swim at all. Swimming lessons are essential.

How deep is the pool? Our teaching pool is 0.8 meters and my smaller than average 4 year old (96cm) can touch the floor. I would’ve thought there were rules about the depth?

I understand that it’s difficult not to have a knee jerk reaction when you think they are in trouble, but going under water will help him learn, and trust his buoyancy which is in turn going to help him learn to swim. It’s important you stay calm so as to not make him question trusting himself.

however, if they can’t adequately touch the floor my understanding is they aren’t supposed to be doing lessons without a parent in the water so I’d be checking the depth vs his height as a precaution.

My daughter can swim now but even then with 8 in a class the instructor does it in two groups so 4 go at the same time and they always have even when she was smaller. I think that would have been better idea and you could suggest that to him.
We've had a teacher before who didn't really pay attention and was always chatting to other people while the kids were swimming. I didnt like it and pulled her out.

I find it bizarre too. I think people are hugely underestimating the risk of a non-swimmer being under the water for a not-insubstantial length of time in a busy swimming lesson.

I’d suggest some private 1-1 lessons. It would have cost me less and saved a lot of time. I spent 8yrs for 2 kids sitting by the side of a blooming pool! Neither swim now, but i guess they still know how!!

I'd put him in lessons with an instructor who can keep him safe from harm.

My dd tried level 1 lessons but found it really hard so I put her in pre swim where its a bout getting used to the water, blowing bubbles, generally getting used to going under without swimming. Is this an option? You could do this yourself if there isn't a pre swim class.

I’d have felt the same as you. Children need to feel safe to learn properly, it’s a basic thing. My kids had swimming lessons and were never pushed beyond what they could do - before there was any risk of going under water, they were all taught how to blow bubbles under water, and also practised how to roll over and float from very early on (with the teacher holding them). The first time they went without noodles, they did about a metre to the side with the teacher in the water ready to catch them, and they gradually built up the distance over the weeks. I don’t think YABU and I would also be concerned about this.

I think it’s unfair (and damaging) to say he wasn’t safe from harm. The lifeguards hadn’t felt it appropriate to intervene. I suspect it looked - and is therefore being portrayed by OP as worse than it was.

I think.you.should either pay for private lessons or take your son to the pool outside of the lessons so you can both have fun in the water and.learn to relax.

This is absolutely shocking. I suggest you kick off as hard as you can until the instructor is sacked. Then lobby to have the pool closed in case another child nearly drowns. In fact, don't let you child do anything with an element of risk in case something bad happens.

No wonder kids are such snowflakes nowadays...

I disagree with most - I have similar aged DC who are utterly shite at swimming who go to similar leisure centre classes with similar ratios.

They've never once been in that situation - if everyone's swimming, they all have a noodle (or float as they progress). If they don't have a noodle, the instructor is with them one on one. I don't think what you've described sounds safe at all and definitely isn't on our Swim Ireland Level 1 curriculum.

Going under intentionally is great and something my children are clearly never going to accomplish, but going under accidentally can really put them off swimming at this stage, not to mention the fact that it clearly wasn't a safe situation.

He's learning to swim OP, you are being very over involved. Of course he will go under, it's part of being in the water, learning to be ok in the water, learning to swim. He will never be confident in the water otherwise

You're anxious so trust the swim teacher instead of letting your anxiety undermine her.

I taught mine to swim, I was relaxed but I think teaching them myself probably made me more relaxed about it as it was just them and I was right there all the time. Then they went to normal swim classes after. Maybe do more swimming with him as well that might help you find the classes easier.

I'm a swimming teacher and this to me isn't great. If a child is nervous already and accidentally goes under it can create a lot more fear. We guide our children and build up to going under when they've gained their confidence being in the pool. They can learn a good start of strokes without the need for their face in from the get go. Leisure centre lessons where I am aren't known for being the best, they're more concerned about just getting from a to b rather than it being a good stroke technique.

Yeah some really odd replies .

At my son's swimming they use floats to support initially. Removing/reducing as child becomes more confident/competent.

8 children swimming at once is too much, how can the instructor watch technique, instruct, and keep safe all 8 simultaneously? What if 2 or 3 got into difficulties at same time.

And what will it do for your child's confidence in the water?

I would complain and look for another swimming pool.

He's learning to swim OP, you are being very over involved. Of course he will go under, it's part of being in the water, learning to be ok in the water, learning to swim. He will never be confident in the water otherwise.

This is very true, but it isn't appropriate for the teacher to have 8 inexperienced swimmers doing doggy paddle without floats or noodles at the same time. Just not enough supervision when we all know how easily children can drown. I'd agree with you if the DC had quickly gone under with a teacher in arm's reach.