Is it possible to be 43 and NOT be perimenopausal

[Improbablywrong]

I don’t have any symptoms except that I feel more agitation around my period. Always been like that actually but just a little worse, although we do have other stresses.

Not a single other symptom. My periods are regular as clockwork and have not changed in anyway. I had a blood test done recently and all came back normal.

And yet every single friend I have (same age as me) is talking about perimenopause as if it’s 100% definitely that we are all in it and it is to blame for everything. Bad day at work? Perimenopause. Did a big fart? Perimenopause. Itchy armpit? Perimenopause.

I can’t relate and I find it kind of catastrophising very normal things. When the real symptoms come, how will they feel then? When I say oh no, I don’t think it’s perimenopause as I don’t have symptoms, they’ll list all these things that I don’t think are symptoms.

so, is it possible to actually NOT be perimenopausal as soon as you hit 40?

Oh Mumsnet has diagnosed everyone over the age of 38 as peri over the last few years.

You’re right, I’ll be sure to send you a full rundown of my £££ hormone balance sheet that some clinic sells me based on a culture of fear, health anxiety and keeping women in control by basing all their health problems on their womb - even then you’ll tell me it must be wrong 🤣

we are doing it to each other; right here on this thread

That's actually really offensive to women who have had real issues.

I think it worthwhile pointing out not everyone will have issues but for some, those issues can be very significant.

Women most likely to have issues are interesting. If you had post natal depression or are neuro-diverse apparently it's more likely that you will have issues.

As I said upthread suicide rates peak during the perimenopause period too.

You would not be making similar utterly dismissive comments to this about regarding depression without being rightly taken to task over it.

The same applies here.

I didn’t know that ND or post natal depression showed a link with menopause symptoms. Is there any link with heavy periods and more severe menopause?

OP, I get what you are saying as a woman who is not peri-menopausal. However, you may find as the time goes on that when you are peri, medical professionals will dismiss most of your symptoms as something else entirely and you will have a right fight on your hands to get anyone as much as do a blood test for you.
So no, I don't think everything can be dismissed as peri but I also welcome some publicity around the subject and women willing to advocate for themselves.

most people with depression would not be undermining every unrelated health issue I have or even every unrelated emotion I have, by claiming that I am depressed too. Or that I am simply unaware of what’s happening to me.

Of course it is possible! I have just turned 50 and I would only say I have been feeling a bit peri in the last 6-9 months.

My mother and grandmother were the same - last periods not until 56/57 respectively!

Agreed. eventually “she’ll learn”

And I will, it’ll come to us all. But not today and that’s the point, I am not perimenopausal just because people say I am.

it’s like everyone cannot wait to say “actually! I think you’ll find xyz” it’s not a competition. Can we not just immediately assume all women are at the mercy of her hormones just because she’s over 40.

I didn’t get any perimenopause symptoms. I woke up one day with the first UTI I had ever had when I was 54. I kept getting them and also hot flushes and my periods were very irregular. I was in actual menopause before I noticed anything.

I got it from about 37
I'm not peri, I have stage 4 endo so glad they checked out my symptoms

Almost 47 here. Periods still regular. My hairs falling out a bit and i have put on weight (probably my diet) but no brain fog or hot flushes. I've been knackered since 30 (first baby).

No OP, it's not possible. In our 40s, every single ache, itch, frustration, hangover, getting irritated in a Teams meeting, is due to perimenopause. Or ADHD.

yes of course
mine started at 48 and three years later I still have regular periods and i can feel when i ovulate (my periods are heavier)

Exactly!

Honestly, when it does come to me, I really hope I am not the sort of woman who dismisses my friends when they talk about their lives and insists they don’t know anything on the topic.

We arent like this about periods at the start. Why does it have to become like this. Work has definitely got to be done on how education is delivered because “you don’t know this that or the other” is not winning hearts and minds.

My worst symptoms were around age 42/43, although I didn't realise it at the time. The rage. Constant anger with everything and everyone. Probably for about 6 months. Periods were still like clockwork. Going on 10 months now without a period - they just stopped with no "irregularity" - and there are some other physical things, e.g. thinning hair, but the general irritability has gone. I take evening primrose every day, which helps with irritability and hot flushes (I get them when I don't take EP). Anyway, to sum up, it could well be perimenopause rage, yet you still could have the best part of a decade of periods ahead of you. Try evening primrose!

I had my last period at 60 so doubt I was anywhere near peri at 43.

Little bit of info. Menopause is actually just one day - the day when you haven't had a natural period for a year. The upto 10 years prior is peri-menopausal and after is post-menopausal.

That was perimenopause! Menopause is defined as the point at which your periods actually stop and don't return, everything leading up to that moment is peri-menopause and everything from that point onwards is post-menopause.

Edited to say cross posted with @cleowasmycat!

I get what OP means

Like I say to a friend
"Couldn't sleep last night with a night sweat"
Friend "oh it's peri!"
No, it's the medication I've been on for years that I've said before gives me bad night sweats

Heavy bleeding?
Peri
Nope. Endometriosis

And it’s happened right here to me too… OP just doesn’t know what perimenopause is. 🙄

I’m 46 this year and for the last few years have I’ve been backwards and forwards to my GP who insists I am not perimenopausal and yet my hair keeps shedding, my joints ache, have awful brain fog, exhaustion, and for the fist time in my life have terrible anxiety. My GP had the cheek to test my bloods for alcohol levels instead and I only discovered it when I checked my NHS app - I don’t drink!

Sorry youve had this. In this case where there is a clear rationale for thinking it’s perimenopause crack on, advocate for the tests, keep on at them etc (hope it gets better for you too x)

43 is relatively young to be in peri, so I'd say it's entirely possible

yes after GPs allegedly ignoring peri/menopause for years it's now their favourite scapegoat; I carefully put together a list of how my diagnosed diastasis recti was affecting me, and where/when the pain was, then the female GP started trying to pin it on the menopause "what about menopause symptoms? you're getting a lot of pains?" yes because my core isn't working properly 🫠

Of course it is!

I had my last period at 46, no hint of perimenopause before that. Periods were normal and regular and then one day I didn’t have another one. After that the symptoms started and 7 years later I’ve finally started hrt 😂