Making packed lunch

[Crystallizedring]

This has come up quite a few times in our house and wondering if I'm mean or unreasonable. It's mostly light hearted.
Since day 2 of secondary school my DDs have been responsible for sorting out their lunch for school/college, either taking in food or buying food but even now they tell me friends still get their lunch made for them. Some of these kids are 17!
I thought they were winding me up but have actually had it confirmed by parents that they make packed lunch. So I'm wondering if I'm unreasonable to say no, do it yourself (or take money in).
I am a SAHM for our youngest (4) with additional needs so I could do it but it's one less thing if they do it. DH also does his own lunch event though apparently everyone he works with has a wife who does it.
So do you make packed lunch for your kids at college or secondary school?
YABU you should make your kids packed lunch
YANBU they should make it themselves.

I make sandwiches for me. So I make them for the kids as well. If DS(15) wants something in a food flask, I need to know before I start on sandwiches, and he makes his own.

I can't imagine getting out the bread, butter, fillings and then only making one lunch. It takes about 30s extra per child to do it in one go. Would take much longer for everyone to do their own.

Not senseless when they either have enough for a load or the sense to ask if anyone has something they want to add to their load. The only part I found frustrating was that DS in particular would put a wash on at 10pm.

I tend to do mine and DS’s for nursery (he’s almost 3). Occasionally I’ll do DH’s too, but we usually have different stuff and we find it’s just easier if we sort our own mostly. Whatever suits, every family is different!

I disagree, it works well here. DD only has to learn about her own clothes, not randomly which of DH's shirts and DS"s t shirts can tumble. It's taken a huge load off me since DD started doing her own and she is learning what she needs for when she moves out.

She puts whites in the main basket for me to do - she has hardly any.

I'm a sahm and make my teens lunches. However I think it's absolutely fine to have them make them themselves.

I just think it’s easier to do laundry together. Doing it can be divided between people though. I’ve not had a tumble drier for about 25 years though, so no learning about that.

But it would be an extra job for me. I'm not making myself a packed lunch, I'm not making DS a packed lunch as he's on a very reduced timetable. So I don't really see it's a problem for DD2 and DH to make their lunches.

Can you make it together and use it as bonding time?.

Of course it’s not unreasonable to expect 17y.o to do their packed lunch unless any extra circumstances or trade off.
I usually do packed lunches for both DD and DH. DD has additional needs (extra circumstances). DH does our breakfast while I do his packed lunch (trade off).
I don’t mind our arrangement, it works well.

I made it clear to my kids if they wanted packed lunches they make it themselves. They've been doing it since they were at secondary on & off. Its good for them - they learn how to manage time & think about planning & shopping for food (they tell us what tjey want for tje supermarket order. Occasionally we help - like on an exam day but generally its good for them to get on with it.

I’ve been surprised at teenager DD saying this; we definitely don’t and my primary age DC are encouraged to help make their packed lunch. I see it as part of learning what a balanced lunch is.

Also though I don’t make my husbands lunch (if anything he’s more likely to make mine) and I’ve been surprised at how many women seem to make their DH lunches too

Bento style boxes seem to be in fashion. Have you tried introducing this to your DD? It might be fun for her to try.

Hmm my DM made our lunches until we left school and also made my Dad's. 20 rounds of cheese and marmite sandwiches on a Sunday evening, into sandwich bags and into the freezer.
Each morning after breakfast, we'd grab our sandwich from the freezer and an apple or banana and leave. We had water fountains at school and in 6th form a hot drinks machine in the common room. No wonder we were all slim and healthy!

This.

DD is 10yo and makes hers on the days she wants a packed lunch, she usually packs up the non-fridge bits the night before then in the morning just finishes it off with a sandwich and yoghurt.

Those that work with my DH reckon hes spoiled and Im a kitchen goddess

I always cook more then whats going to be eaten and I throw together a meal in a ex Chinese takeaway carton and shove it in the freezer.

There is always a loaf of bread or rolls in the house and a fridge with cooked meats and cheese and salad, theres eggs and tinned fish, so if there isnt a frozen meal - hes fit to make his own - the food is there , along with fruit, yoghurts, crisps etc

Years ago I found out I was being a mug for getting up at silly o'clock to make his piece, then found out he was away to the cafe for a fry

Make sure the makings are there and let them get on with it, Now DH only goes to the cafe as a treat

Mine help make lunches. Eldest is 7.

Its not hard to put ham and salad in a wrap and add a yoghurt and a piece of fruit from the bowl

My 15 year old makes his own, he has a cheese sandwich every day. I usually make my 13 year olds because I make mine and we have the same. If I'm not having packed lunch she'll make her own, very occasionally she'll make mine.

Mone make their own. I help as needed, buy them what they want at the supermarket etc. But they know what exactly want on a day to day basis, like an extra snack as they are doing sport for example.

I make lunches for mine age 15, 13 & 6 - sometimes for DH too if he wants one.

Reasons being 15yo would eat everything and leave not enough for others, 13yo would just eat crisps and a drink and 6yo would prob just pack fruits! They need to eat a balance of food, use stuff that is open first, ensure there is enough for everyone etc so it's quicker and easier to do it myself.

In the school holidays though they can and do make their own lunches - hot or cold options and often make mine too so they are not being held back independence wise.

I made DS’s lunch every day of his internship and I made him lunch when at secondary. That’s it now as next summer he will be living independently. Most SAHM’s would be making packed lunch I’d guess (I work full time) but up to you what you done but your kids are probably right other parents do it still, or at least stock up on the ingredients

My mum made my lunches even when I returned home after college to teach!
Am very proficient at housework now so I don't think it did me any harm.
I will do the same for my children too as they move into secondary school.

@Aria20 I get your logic but those are the kind of reasons that we have our DC either make their own or be involved; they need to learn those lessons as kids or be selfish adults or ones who don’t know how to pack a healthy lunch

I sometimes make a packed lunch for my kids aged 15 and 20. Sometimes they'll make one for me. It's nice to help each other out and do something for each other.

I make mains for my DC's but not for DH. They put together the side bits like fruit, chocolate, drink etc but I do a sandwich mainly because I can put some salad in it or vary the fillings. I also sometimes put leftovers in a food flask.