AIBU to be in love with my adoptive brother?

[orangesandlemonssaythebellsofstclements]

Sorry for the clickbait title - this is actually just a fun thread.

Take the plot of a book and turn it into a AIBU

I'll start.

AIBU to want to marry my adoptive brother that my dad found somewhere and instead of just doing it, acting like a total bitch to him and everyone else even after I'd died?

Try writing some poetry. That's sure to impress Pandora.

I work with a man, we’re business partners but I began as a pa. I know he really values me and I try to deny I love him. I think he feels the same.
im divorced from my husband and have a great boyfriend, but he is starting to try to tell me what to do a bit!
we’ve been through so much together and our line of work is so interesting.
im not sure if we should go for it and see what happens. Or will it ruin everything?
my friend (let’s call her JKR) seems to be thinking we should wait and wait and wait, but I’m getting very impatient.

Don’t let her in. Mend your mother's spectacles and talk (and talk, and talk) to your niece instead.

Hide his artificial leg until he gives in.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

The next time he says anything just say 'NOT NOW DS'. That should sort the problem out.

When I was 18, I had this amazing boyfriend. He had no money and was a squaddie, but he was GORGEOUS and we had an incredible connection. He asked me to marry him and my mum's friend told me to say no because I was too young and he was too poor, so I did, and he went off with the armed forces somewhere. I never met anyone who could measure up to him

Now I'm 27 and he's back, and he's STILL gorgeous, and he's also PROPERLY rich. I'm feeling old and on the shelf and am surrounded by my idiot family (my dad's managed to spend so much money that we've got to rent out our nice manor to MY EX'S SISTER!). Also, the guy who's meant to inherit my dad's title (yeah...) has shown up and keeps flirting with me. And my BIL's little sister is hardcore flirting with my ex.

WIBU to stay out of all the mess and make friends with the guy who likes poetry instead (coincidentally ALSO my ex's friend)?

She's quite toxic. If you take her advice about men you'll be miserable for life.

Aibu? So my bestie is a guy, he's lived next door for years and we've always hung out together, along with my sisters too. Anyway he has now declared his love for me!

Wtf, why do men always do this. I'm really starting to think it's not possible for a guy and a girl to just be friends, they are always just waiting for the opportunity to hit on you.

What do I do now? It's going to be sooo awkward.

😂😂😂

They get collected by some giant fuck off birds after don't they? Get the birds to carry the house, then you get to avoid the giant spiders etc

Who's being unreasonable here?

My partner is a bit of a feeder. The trouble is that they keep on offering me things I do not like and won't take no for an answer. Last week, they followed me around, insisting that I tried the same dish all day.

I do appreciate that they've cooked for me, but it doesn't seem to matter what I say, they'll just keep on pestering me to try their latest creation - I've switched the light off to go to bed and even then, they're there asking me if I'd eat it in the dark.

In the end, I snapped and told them I couldn't and wouldn't eat them on a boat, with a goat, not in the rain, in the dark, not on a train, in a car, in a tree, in a house, in a box, not with a mouse or with a fox. But they still insisted that I tried the dish in case I liked it.

Who's in the wrong?

I really need some advice. There is a new girl in my class who I've got a massive crush on. She's a really cute redhead but for some reason when trying to impress her I made fun of her hair. Now she thinks I'm a dick and won't talk to me!

How can I get her to give me another chance?

What's this one? It's driving me nuts!

I’m at boarding school and one of the older boys has been mean and snarky to me since day 1. I’ve had enough. I know he puts me down because I’m more talented than him. AIBU to raise the dead?

Rescue her when she gets stuck on a raft in the middle of a river.

She’ll still be cross but she’ll mellow over time and eventually realise you are much hotter than her rich boyfriend

Sense & Sensibility

Honestly, if you pursue this one she’s going to be incredibly hard work, and you’ll have to spend half your life listening to her bore on (and on, and on) about how someone she’s known for five minutes is a kindred spirit.

My girlfriend accidentally got shot and killed by a crazy guy who was trying to kill my best friend.

AIBU to destroy the world with dark magic?

I bloody knew I knew it! Good one.

My husband has an amazing chance of promotion when his old boss retires but he's just not ruthless enough to grab the chance (might need to be a bit underhand I guess). WIBU to invoke evil spirits to help me give him a kick up the arse?

A little intense, true.

But then you liked it, so maybe they had a point.

Once she has had a life threatening illness she will calm down a bit and be grateful for your loving care, Colonel.

I don't think this Sense & Sensibility one got enough love!

Please help settle this dispute. AIBU? My son recently had this freak accident and long story short he's just not himself lately, physically or mentally. He's kind of flatter and he's started up with some risk taking behaviours like mailing himself off to see his mates. I'm worried it's rubbing off on my youngest too- the other day I caught him using his brother as a kite. Should I be worried? My DH says boys will be boys and I'm a killjoy. I think he just doesn't want to admit there's an issue because he feels guilty about not putting that noticeboard up properly. Wwyd?