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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Feral children

678 replies

Overbearingndn · 03/09/2024 19:01

Several children, have been arrested in connection with the death of an 80 year old dog walker.

What is wrong with children today? I remember the Bulger case and it sent shockwaves around the world, now people just accept that children kill.
https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/article/2024/sep/03/five-children-arrested-over-murder-80-year-old-man-in-leicestershire

opening post edited by MNHQ

OP posts:
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8
MsLavender · 03/09/2024 22:02

oakleaffy · 03/09/2024 21:56

Not many many middle class wealthy families known to Social services or running feral.
Partying hard, yes, but violent crimes aren’t their cup of tea.

Really? Do you live in the real world?

Lms63738 · 03/09/2024 22:02

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines - previously banned poster.

MsLavender · 03/09/2024 22:04

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines - previously banned poster.

A man has been murdered by by all means continue your sniping and stereotyping, extremely helpful.

Starlingexpress · 03/09/2024 22:06

MsLavender · 03/09/2024 22:04

A man has been murdered by by all means continue your sniping and stereotyping, extremely helpful.

And you believe your contribution is helpful? In what way exactly?

PadstowGirl · 03/09/2024 22:06

EsmaCannonball · 03/09/2024 21:34

I'm sorry, but it is always the parents. I remember seeing a woman on the television moaning that her sons were criminals because once they got to the age of 13 she was no longer able to stop them doing what they want. A child psychologist agreed with her that is was difficult to stop boys that age from behaving as they like but then told her that it was still her fault because she had failed to parent then properly up to the age of 13 and instill them with basic decency and proper values. If your 13 year old is susceptible to yobs and gangs and drugs and doesn't know it's wrong to harass elderly people then you have spent 13 years being a terrible parent.

It isn't always poor parents, either. Affluenza is a thing. Some wealthier parents raise their children to be arrogant and entitled and thinking they are untouchable.

Yes indeed, the killers of Yusuf Mackie were quite affluent and at private school. Their wealth didn't stop them turning into monsters, it did seem to go a long way in lessening their sentences though.

shuggles · 03/09/2024 22:08

@PyongyangKipperbang DS2 by 14 was physically bigger and stronger than me. If he was so inclined to play truant or leave the house and do stuff like this, I couldnt stop him.

This is why it bloody annoys me when parents, but especially single mothers get taken to court because her 6 foot, 12 stone,15 year old son wont go to school and she is in trouble for not getting him there. How on earth can she reasonably be expected to do that?

You have the most bizarre perspective on this. First of all, a 6 foot 15 year would be a tiny percentage of teenage boys, probably 3% or less of all boys. Second, what's physical strength got to do with anything? My mum is tiny and that never stopped her from putting her foot down or telling me what to do. Your son's size has absolutely no relevance to anything, and it just sounds like a really sad excuse for not being a proper parent.

TheNuthatch · 03/09/2024 22:08

According to Sky News, 4 of the children have now been released without charge. One 14 year old still in custody.

MsLavender · 03/09/2024 22:09

Starlingexpress · 03/09/2024 22:06

And you believe your contribution is helpful? In what way exactly?

It's more helpful than speculation and stereotyping, yes. Or do you think that people should just be free to run their mouths about poor people on benefits, single parents, those with tattooes, white people etc without being challenged.

Jifmicroliquid · 03/09/2024 22:09

My post was deleted and I’m not sure why. I feel I raised perfectly reasonable points.
I’m assuming someone didn’t like what I had to say about today’s parenting.

TaylorSwish · 03/09/2024 22:09

ilovesooty · 03/09/2024 19:30

I expect by now they're whining and crying and blaming each other. "Wasn't me. I told them to stop" 😡

The truth will come out soon. It was probably recorded on Snapchat.

saraclara · 03/09/2024 22:09

PyongyangKipperbang · 03/09/2024 22:01

Sorry further derailing.....oddly enough my boss at work commented on jitty! Had to explain it means a cut through and she had never heard it. Think its a derbys/staffs crossover word as we are right on the border and no one outside the area seems to have heard of it! Bit like mardy used to be.

I smiled when I saw your first post saying jitty. I grew up near Derby, and I've not heard it since I left the area at 18. Fifty years ago! The jitty near my house was a major feature of my childhood!

BlackShuck3 · 03/09/2024 22:10

shuggles · 03/09/2024 22:08

@PyongyangKipperbang DS2 by 14 was physically bigger and stronger than me. If he was so inclined to play truant or leave the house and do stuff like this, I couldnt stop him.

This is why it bloody annoys me when parents, but especially single mothers get taken to court because her 6 foot, 12 stone,15 year old son wont go to school and she is in trouble for not getting him there. How on earth can she reasonably be expected to do that?

You have the most bizarre perspective on this. First of all, a 6 foot 15 year would be a tiny percentage of teenage boys, probably 3% or less of all boys. Second, what's physical strength got to do with anything? My mum is tiny and that never stopped her from putting her foot down or telling me what to do. Your son's size has absolutely no relevance to anything, and it just sounds like a really sad excuse for not being a proper parent.

Edited

@shuggles
leave it out, how disingenuous can you POSSIBLY get!! 🙄

Gimmeabreak2025 · 03/09/2024 22:10

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Backtoschoolbaby · 03/09/2024 22:11

@soupfiend I'm only on page 1 and I agree.

We have interaction with young people and I Wonder how shielded we are from real life.
Many "children" are not raised or have anything any regular people would even begin to imagine as family or home life.

NortieTortie · 03/09/2024 22:12

Oh my god, I clicked on this thread expecting a rant about children being allowed to run wild in public or something like that.

Absolutely horrified, that poor man must've been terrified.

PinkyFlamingo · 03/09/2024 22:13

Icedlatteofdreams · 03/09/2024 20:12

I didn't say that did I? I just said it's wild to blame gentle parenting. However, I do think it matters what type of childhood they have as how can we prevent further deaths unless we understand why children kill and the circumstances and environment that breeds this type of behaviour?

Its not really rocket science though is it to understand what kind of childhoods these kids will have had.

Rollorock · 03/09/2024 22:13

stinkydoveproducts · 03/09/2024 19:11

It's truly awful. I couldn't believe what I was reading. I wonder if any of the parents are openly racist and condone such attacks, particularly in light of the recent riots.

There has been speculation by neighbours if it was racist and I think another Asian man was assaulted or racially harassed very recently in the same area. Someone else said it wasn’t the first time he’s been bothered by teens - on another occasion they threw stones.

It’s horrific I agree but similar thing happens in my town about 18 years ago. I was coming back from uni for the holidays and the night after I arrived there were policemen going door to door as an older man up the road about 65 years old i think, had been killed by some teens coming out the local pub . There wasn’t much media coverage. I wouldn’t even have known had the police not came to my door. It just makes you think how the media can have a big impact on how we perceive crime trends.

Would be interesting to look at stats as it does feel things are getting worse but I’m not sure if that’s accurate.

Firefly1987 · 03/09/2024 22:14

EsmaCannonball · 03/09/2024 21:53

I know a single mother whose 13 year old son came home whinging that he'd been kicking a ball against an elderly neighbour's wall, it had gone over and the elderly woman had refused to give it back. She was livid. She frogmarched him round there, made him apologise, gave the elderly woman her phone number and told her to call if her son ever did that or anything like it again and then made him give the ball to a charity shop. She then found signed him up to a cheap local football club so he could play sport without being a nuisance to anyone. He is now a young man who has turned out really well.

Yep that's how kids used to be parented. A big problem is parents becoming so defensive of their kids these days and believing they can do no wrong. That didn't used to happen where parents automatically took their kids side and made everyone else into the villains. But that's where we're at now. But they always want society to pitch in and help and "it takes a village" with everything else.

samarrange · 03/09/2024 22:14

TheNuthatch · 03/09/2024 22:08

According to Sky News, 4 of the children have now been released without charge. One 14 year old still in custody.

There were people on this thread calling for all of them to be named. 🙄

LostittoBostik · 03/09/2024 22:15

Has any person on this thread heard of contempt of court or prejudicial content?
Suggest you all google it before the trial of these children becomes unsafe and they are unable to face justice

Thebaguette · 03/09/2024 22:16

soupfiend · 03/09/2024 19:25

If you work with children you wouldnt be surprised at this. Im more surprised that people are surprised at violence from girls.

Yes. But the other day posters there was a huge argument over how innocent 12-13 years old are. So I won't be surprised if there are posters coming to excuse these kids.

Bellamari · 03/09/2024 22:18

TheNuthatch · 03/09/2024 22:08

According to Sky News, 4 of the children have now been released without charge. One 14 year old still in custody.

So it’s as I guessed. One murderer and the others were unfortunately there. How much do you want to bet the culprit is male?

HeyPrestoAlakazam · 03/09/2024 22:19

Just reading the article from The Mirror...it's utterly heartbreaking. He had Osteoparosis and they broke his neck, leaving him screaming in pain. He was 50 yards from his home.

Then reading about the antisocial behaviour...It could have been written about my hometown recently - we've had lots of the same issues, though not racially motivated.

This is outing but I don't care. I'm from Lytham. It's not cheap to live here and there aren't many working class kids nor kids in the care system in Lytham itself. One of the schools, Lytham St Annes High, has some children from rougher areas, and some in the care system brought here from other areas of the UK but it's certainly not the "tattooed, different fathers, living on benefits" demographic some people above are mentioning. The other state senior school is a "good" Catholic school and the other is a large private school.

Our louts are firmly middle class. Every other day there's something on our street's FB pages about children on roofs throwing rocks, beating younger kids and filming it, vandalism, mugging - always, "if anyone knows these little brats in North Face/Canada Goose/Moncler jackets then tell them to stop x" usually with CCTV/Ring doorbell footage. Always white, "naice' looking kids whose parents have no idea what they are up to. Can't imagine for a second they'd do anything wrong. Benign neglect.

Recently a beautiful young girl in the town took her own life as a result of horrific, relentless bullying (by another girl, mainly) and nothing was done by the police to hold her bullies accountable, despite evidence. A couple of months ago there was a horrible video of a young girl in nearby St Annes being hounded whilst walking down the street and physically attacked by a slightly older teenage girl and boy (14/15). Police attended school the next day but again, no charges brought.

I agree we are at the point now where as well as the children facing criminal records, parents should be also be prosecuted. Even the naice middle class ones who buy their kids £1k coats and let them have free range to "explore" over the summer. Some of them are probably even mumsnetters, shock horror.

TheNuthatch · 03/09/2024 22:19

samarrange · 03/09/2024 22:14

There were people on this thread calling for all of them to be named. 🙄

Yup. I think I even read a pp calling for them to be put down!

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