Your recommendations for cosmopolitan living outside of London

[Kalaboom]

DH and I are looking to move from our small rural village to somewhere with a bit more buzz and more in the way of restaurants, bars, shops and community social events.

We had the kids quite young and they're about to fly the nest, meaning we have the luxury of downsizing to a more expensive area if needed and we don't need to worry about schools etc. We're barely grazing 40 and this is a sort of second lease of life for us, so we really want to find somewhere with a vibrant, welcoming community and more going on than our sleepy spot in suburbia currently offers!

London not an option and ideally we'll stay in the south east close to family.

Possible contenders include:

Marlow
Henley
St Albans
Winchester
Windsor

We'd really like it to be somewhere with a bit of charm and character as opposed to being very urban or built-up, hence the list above. Bonus points for being on a river or canal or with easy countryside access for some scenic walks with the dogs.

Am I missing anywhere else worth considering? And can anyone share first-hand experiences of what any of the above places are like? We've visited all of them regularly on days out but appreciate living there is a different matter.

Is Oxford worth adding to the list? I've heard it's not so welcoming to non-locals and can be quite cliquey...

What’s the budget?

I'd rule out St Albans and Windsor to be honest, the first very expensive for what it offers, the second because you will be overrun by visitors at various times of year.

Oxford is a lot bigger than Marlow, Henley or Windsor and I would say has more going on. The idea that it's not welcoming to locals is a bit ridiculous as at least half the population of Oxford wasn't born there.

@LlynTegid why do you feel St Albans is bad value for what it offers, out of interest? I would imagine it's expensive because it's a popular commuter town which is understandable and something we'd benefit from in a way, but is the social scene not very good?

Do you need to commute? St Albans is famously quick into the city so you pay for that.

also..what’s your budget? It makes a massive difference!

@Icanttakethisanymore no need to commute as we both work remotely. Nice to be able to get into the city fairly easily for theatre, nights out etc but that would be a handful of times a year.

Budget around 700k.

and what do yiu need as a minimum? In terms of sq ft or bedrooms etc? Detached, semi? Flat in a big house? Outside space?

@Icanttakethisanymore fortunately we've done a good amount of research on Rightmove and have identified lots of suitable options in all of the locations mentioned that are well within our budget and living requirements. The thread is really just to try and get some local insights into the pros and cons of living in each area in terms of day-to-day enjoyment

ok… but you’ve asked for other areas so how would I know if a property in another nice area would fit your criteria given the budget?

Are you familiar with Manningtree in north Essex? It might be a bit small for what you're after but it's a wonderful place to live. It's got a river, a very vibrant community and it's on the edge of an area of outstanding natural beauty. Very close to Colchester, the Essex coast and also on the mainline to London.

How about exploring those areas, to see if you’d actually like living there? Do a couple of day trips to each area to see how it feels. That seems like it’d more productive rather than asking the opinions of strangers on here!

@Icanttakethisanymore we're prepared to downsize quite considerably in exchange for the right location, so really anything from a 1-2 bed flat upwards in the right place would be open to consideration, as extreme as it sounds. As mentioned we have small dogs so a garden of some kind is probably our only real non-negotiable property-wise

@GoldOnyx as stated in the post we've spent many day-trips in all of the locations listed, so really the next step for us is to hear first-hand experiences from others who have actually lived there (or nearby)

How about Cambridge, Guildford or Reigate? Cambridge is beautiful and Guildford also has a nice feel to it (although I don’t know it as well). I don’t know Reigate, but have heard from friends that it’s very nice.

Sorry for missing that from your post. Which areas did you prefer on the day trips?

@SaveItForTheBirds I'd never heard of Manningtree so definitely will take a look, thanks. I can imagine being near the coast it has a lot going for it. My only worry is that north essex is possibly a little far from our friends and family, but doesn't hurt to take a look

Assuming from your options that you can’t go east of London (Kent)? If you could then Folkestone, Margate, etc might fit the bill.

In your shoes I would also look at Chichester and Guildford.

@GoldOnyx No worries! Cambridge is gorgeous but as with the other poster's recommendation of Manningtree, I worry it's a little further north of London than is ideal for staying in touch with family and friends, who are more south/south-west. Reigate might be worth a look though and would be OK proximity-wise

I'd definitely live in Marlow if I could 😍

Lewes. I'd move there tomorrow if I could afford it. Sorry no idea if it's where you want.

Ok so it’s a bit of a balancing act - places with good commutes to London will be expensive but also very ‘cosmopolitan’ because of that.i might look at places with slightly more awkward commutes like Marlow, over St Albans, for example. You can get into The City in about 20 mins from St Albans whereas Marlow is a longer commute with a change and also Paddington which is less good for most people. Winchester is really nice and has the benefit of being within easy reach of the Dorset coast as well as London. Culturally places around Brighton (like Lewes perhaps) are a bit more liberal and a you get crowd. Lots of trendy east Londoners have headed for Margate aka Shoreditch on sea. Tring in Hertfordshire is nice but culturally more like Marlow than Lewes.

Never felt Oxford is unfriendly. It has a fairly transient population in general, due to professors, doctors, and scientists moving onto to different projects etc, plus of course all the students. Also has a very diverse population for the same reasons. Because of this, I find locals to be welcoming of new people.
Obviously lovely buildings in the centre. It is "a cycling city" so traffic can be bad as it is generally pushed onto a few main roads.
Property is VERY expensive though.

forgot to add, Oxford has fast trains into London, and has lots of concerts and sports.

Why is London not an option?

Thame? Wallingford? Abingdon? Similar feels to Marlow and lovely communities