Your recommendations for cosmopolitan living outside of London

[Kalaboom]

DH and I are looking to move from our small rural village to somewhere with a bit more buzz and more in the way of restaurants, bars, shops and community social events.

We had the kids quite young and they're about to fly the nest, meaning we have the luxury of downsizing to a more expensive area if needed and we don't need to worry about schools etc. We're barely grazing 40 and this is a sort of second lease of life for us, so we really want to find somewhere with a vibrant, welcoming community and more going on than our sleepy spot in suburbia currently offers!

London not an option and ideally we'll stay in the south east close to family.

Possible contenders include:

Marlow
Henley
St Albans
Winchester
Windsor

We'd really like it to be somewhere with a bit of charm and character as opposed to being very urban or built-up, hence the list above. Bonus points for being on a river or canal or with easy countryside access for some scenic walks with the dogs.

Am I missing anywhere else worth considering? And can anyone share first-hand experiences of what any of the above places are like? We've visited all of them regularly on days out but appreciate living there is a different matter.

Is Oxford worth adding to the list? I've heard it's not so welcoming to non-locals and can be quite cliquey...

Winchester? Or maybe somewhere coastal like Brighton or Hastings?

Unless your husband has a penchant for wearing red shorts in all weathers and you have a Labradoodle (or any other kind of Doodle), I’d avoid Henley.

You may have considered already but what about Cheltenham or Norwich. I find both really charming, have their own character and lots of stuff to see/ do. I live close but don’t rate St Albans at all, I think compared to some of the other places it feels quite provincial probably because it is so quick into London I think people go to London for cultural activities. Plus it’s full of bankers who used to live in Clapham congratulating themselves for moving on!

I don’t know Henley or Marlow well but I agree that Windsor is very touristy. I like Oxford but I’d find it a pain to live there in terms of traffic and parking.

Meant to say, I do have friends who live in Winchester and love it but they are more young families who like coffee places/ parks etc than culture vultures.

With St Albans the property prices are all wrapped up in the short London commute and good schools, neither of which you need.
Windsor is on the flight path.
I would focus on towns in Surrey, how about the Godalming side of Guildford?

OP probably thinks it’s ‘too’ cosmopolitan 😂😂

Winchester and Henley are both very boring sleepy. I’d go for Oxford. Bristol if you don’t mind being further from family.

Brighton

Or… just move to London. You could buy somewhere with a garden for 700k easy

Marlow is lovely. I don’t know if I’d call it cosmopolitan exactly, it’s more very gentrified in a home counties way. For cosmopolitan I’d say you need a city, whereas Marlow is more an overgrown market town.

I lived in St Albans for a good few years. It's quite boring imo. As someone said upthread, it's popularity is due to the train into the city and schools. Neither of which seem massively important to you. Therefore no point paying a premium for those things. You could get much nicer for your money elsewhere I'm sure.

Yes I also agree- what about somewhere in/ very close to London but with a bit of a villagey feel and good community spirit? I’d consider Wimbledon and surrounding areas (Southfields, Wimbledon Park etc), Herne Hill/ Dulwich/ East Dulwich, Greenwich/ Blackheath, Acton, Ealing, Richmond, Twickenham, Hampton, Teddington, Ham etc. I’ve either lived in these places or had close friends/ boyfriends there and some of the “local” things I’ve done have been carolling, choirs, local fetes like baking/ jam making, Christmas light turn ons with the whole community there, farmers markets, amazing fireworks (Blackheath), even Wassailing and bat walks. Obviously coupled with local gem type restaurants and coffee places. All of these places have loads going on in the local area but you can also be in the west end/ south bank quickly. If you’re looking to be occupied and interested they’d take some beating but they’re also mostly nice places to live too (obviously you’d need to research the good/ dodgy bits). Sure there are loads of others I haven’t mentioned too.

Winchester is lovely, I think you should definitely choose it over the others you have mentioned. Also it’s not far from Southampton and Basingstoke for fast trains into London.

I'm just outside Marlow, it's a nice town, if rather gentrified, I wouldn't call it cosmopolitan (tho we do now have an Everyman theatre), but we always go into London for a proper day/night out to do galleries, cocktails, dinner etc.
We do have several good restaurants and decent pubs but as a pp said, it's basically a very upmarket small town.

I hate Henley with a passion.

Brighton/Hove?

Hitchin?

Hebden Bridge

Windsor and Marlow aren’t cosmopolitan, they’re just wealthy. There is a lot more life in the outer London villages like Barnes / Richmond/ Wimbledon

Bingo! Was waiting for that.

London is certainly somewhere that crossed our minds but it doesn't meet our criteria of easy access to lots of nature. We both spent time living in South London during our youth before moving away so we know it reasonably well, and would prefer to live in a town or city that edges immediately onto the countryside. This was a big part of the appeal of Marlow and Henley as you're essentially in the Chilterns.

I've lived in St A all my life. With £700k you'd be downsizing a lot. You'll get much more for your money if you go further north into Beds! I go into London for theatre a lot as there is no decent professional theatre here - the train is very quick when it works but the Thameslink is notoriously unpredictable. But if you like pubs, restaurants and coffee shops you'll be in your element! There's a great independent cinema and lots of interesting history though and great access to countryside, especially if you live on the outskirts.

Why not Bath or Bristol ?

I’ve lived in Henley, work very near Marlow and have family who live there and I used to work in Windsor.
Windsor - no - lots of touristy shops, parking expensive and traffic bad, atmosphere not great at night/evenings as more night clubs etc so a bit rowdier.
Marlow - traffic awful down the high street and on a branch line for the train to london so transport not great. They no longer have a Waitrose 🤣
Henley - would move back in a heartbeat. Lovely walks along the river, really nice shops and cafes and more interesting restaurants than Marlow, I loved living there. It has an Waitrose! Also on a branch line but close to drive to Twyford on the Elizabeth line and from there it’s 57 minutes to Tottenham Court Road direct.

I think in that case I’d be a bit wary of Oxford as it can be a nightmare for traffic. I think there was some talk of limiting journeys into the city centre completely. I usually do a park and ride but not sure I’d be arsed with that on a daily/ weekly basis.

I think one of the smaller towns sounds like a good bet and you’d definitely find decent restaurants and a wine bar or two there, but if you want cutting edge theatres and more than that you’ll most likely end up back in London and, from experience, I really don’t enjoy the late night trains home (take ages, full of people eating burger kings).

Lewes
Brighton
Bath
Bristol
Broadstairs
Margate