To think pregnancy ruined your body?

[Poppins21]

I am on a few other topics at the moment and there seems to be a sentiment that pregnancy ruins your body- especially if you a geriatric mum.

i had my daughter late, i was 38. I loved being pregnant I felt very sexy and my poor husband was the knackered one during those 9 months. I have never looked better than when pregnant.

I had an elective c section and no pain, no issues and a few weeks later I was back in my normal jeans. 10 days post partum I got many comments that I couldn’t have just had a baby. I swam regularly when I was pregnant as the water felt good supporting my belly and I ate super healthy.

So I came through the other side fitter, healthier and with bigger boobs and I do not feel that pregnancy, birth and motherhood ruined my body, my life or my energy.

I understand this is not the case for everyone but be nice to hear some pregnancy positivity. Or maybe I am just a smug delusional so and so 😂

So am I being unreasonable to celebrate what pregnancy can do for you? When I told people I was pregnant I would have to hear so many horror stories about incontinence and stretch marks.

I only got stretch marks after the second, but I'm lucky that they're barely there and low down on my stomach. I quite like them though.

My boobs went. Well, they're still there, but they lost the fullness. I stayed slim, but never quite lost some of the padding on my hips. I was slimmer on mat leave with dd2 than in my 20s, because I walked for miles everyday with one in a sling and one in a pushchair, just for something to do.

It certainly had an impact on my pelvic floor!

I lost the weight easily while breastfeeding but put on weight after stopping. Or perhaps that coincided with the perimenopause!

I did have a certain confidence in my body when pregnant it’s difficult to explain.

Couldn't tell after my first. Then had a gigantic 10lb baby and he's left quite a few stretch marks. Then cancer came along and did a hell of a lot more damage. Honestly I couldn't care less now, it's my body and nothing can change it. I work out and can begin to see changes that I've never had before and that makes me feel a little better.

Yeah, sticking to one DC was the secret of your success there. People having their second DC don't spend the whole pregnancy at ante natal yoga and cooking "super healthy" meals for themselves- different beast entirely

I just had 1 so was not an issue.

But I agree money and support would be an issue with more children.

@Poppins21 Don’t get me wrong, I have never really given out my birth story to friends who hadn’t asked how it went. Held back details from some friends who were already pregnant. But clearly when they knew I was in hospital for two months and the treatment I now undergo they knew something went drastically wrong. My advice to them was to not feel you can’t ask for a CS just because you’re having a healthy pregnancy and to make sure you switch hospitals if you’re not happy with the care. I wish I could have had your experience, my life would be so different.

Christ, the ignorance!

Do you know that people are different, and experience pregnancy differently!

I am so so happy for the women that breeze through it, and their stories are as valid as anyones.

I had a very painful pregnancy, nearly died in childbirth, and was left with many physical disabilities afterwards.

100 years ago I would not be here, full stop (thank you science!)

Yep just had my second and second c section

been back doing Pilates 5 days a week since the baby was 6 weeks old

back in own clothes fast too

having my first kid made me really get my shit together and managed to study part time while working full time and get a massive promotion at work

I went to the gym exert single lunch break without fail too! Never did that pre kids

so yeah never been more productive or fit in my life since my kids

The day after having my second, I looked like I did before ever having children. I had always been quite slim, but it was unexpected. Breastfeeding and running after a toddler made me even slimmer and I never had time to sit down for a proper meal! My DCs are teenagers now and I go to the gym/ don't eat excessively and am the same weight I was before I had children. I feel very lucky because most of it must be genetic.

Many women aren’t in control of whether they get stretch marks, loose skin, retain weight, have inconvenience or other birth injuries after pregnancy – a big factor is genetics and then their birth experience.

I honestly don’t see the point in pumping up a ‘my body wasn’t ruined, I bounced right back!’ narrative in the name of ‘positivity’.

What’s positive and needed is to spread the mindset that your body isn’t ruined even if you experience the consequences above.

How awful (and quite misogynistic) to insinuate that a body be ‘ruined’ anyway. This post perpetuates that so I think you can do better if you’re attempting to do a service to women, OP.

Fair enough 😂

I only heard stuff about bouncing back. I was incredibly active before pregnancy and kept up with gym and swimming as much as I could in pregnancy despite terrible morning sickness.

However, I was told I had prolapse at my 6 week check up. Nobody talks about this before hand - no mention in pregnancy books I read or antenatal classes I attended. So I do feel pregnancy ruined my body. I'm only 4 months pp so aware I have a while to go but it's impacted huge areas of my life and had a big impact mentally.

OP, I’m happy to read a positive post like this! I’m expecting my baby in 2 weeks so I don’t know yet what will happen in my case, but all the negative stories get me down, it’s nice to hear something positive! I went through pregnancy expecting the worst, and I was lucky to have an easy pregnancy, in hindsight I shouldn’t have read so many negative stories about pregnancy because it just made me fear too many ‘what ifs’ that never materialised for me.

I agree with you, my body changed I would never use the word ruined.

but I saw it on several threads told and I feel it was a sad word to use about your body after having a baby.

I know that’s easy for me to say as I had positive experience of both pregnancy and birth.

It would be disingenuous of me to credit pregnancy with something that was largely the work of beer and crisps.

Your body won’t be ruined no matter what the consequences of birth or pregnancy. It’s undergone an amazing feat and you should be extremely proud of it.

It’s the fourth that does it…

Good luck be nice to hear from you in 2 weeks time.

I really hope you have a smug story like mine 😀

😀

I 'bounced back' with both of my pregnancies. One vaginal birth one c section. I didnt do anything in particular. Breastfed both for over a year. My boobs took longer to get back to what they are. However I wouldn't make a post about it as I'm aware this doesnt happen to everyone and some women have long lasting effects from pregnancy/birth. Also whilst I was pregnant I didn't really like hearing about women bouncing back as I felt this huge pressure which i feel is unnecessary and unfair when you have no control over how your body will react ect
I found women talking about how they appreciate their bodies more than ever for producing a live human and focusing how amazing are bodies are and what our bodies are capable of much more positive.
What we look like is really not important. Your post is insensitive weather you mean it or not.

😂

On a very basic level pregnancy is what your body is for. How can something be destroyed by doing what it is designed for.?

Humans have a relatively hard time giving birth as the baby tends to be slightly to large for the birth canal. Giving birth was actually quite dangerous back in the day because complications could be fatal.

Thanks and it was not meant to be insensitive. But good stories would have made my pregnancy less stressful as I said I had an amazing OBGYN and her advice was invaluable.

You did use the word ruined, it's in your thread title.