Going to bed at 8:30 on holiday

[Sharingshared]

On holiday with DH & kids.
I have turned in at 8:30 after a great day at the beach. DH was planning on going to the lounge area to seeing what's going on, with eldest DC, aged 10.
Ive asked him to stay in the hotel room because I don't see the point of going out at this time. DH has agreed, although it took some convincing. He said I was being strange. Am I?

I totally agree. You are being vvu!

Why did you arrange to go there on holiday if you think it is dangerous?

Goodness!

There is absolutely nothing 'rational' or 'normal' about this OP! Nothing!

While I have never controlled anyone else’s bed time - I will horrify you all by saying there have been occasions when I have gone to bed early on holiday😩😩.

have you never been up so early, spent all day exploring in the heat after a very long flight and just collapsed into a lovely crisp hotel bed with room service and local weird tv? The feeling when you know you should get out and explore but your feet ache and you can’t be bother showering and changing - and you want to get up early the next morning to see the sunrise and catch a train to somewhere even more exotic?

it’s a luxury I allow myself one night in any holiday and a I will not have the good ladies of mumsnet judging me

Oh no one is judging you for that, it sounds lovely. It's when it's imposed on others that the problem arises.

No judgement here, but you presumably didn’t impose the same bedtime on your family//friends/whoever else was on the holiday?

Why on earth could your husband and child not go out without you? You are being very selfish, it's not just your holiday.

You going to bed at 8.30 = fine

DH and DC going to check out entertainment = fine

I don’t understand why these two are mutually exclusive.

Again, they weren't even leaving the hotel in downtown Kyiv/Syria/ Baghdad, they were just going down to the lounge.

correct - I even said so in my opening sentence🤓

Massively inconsiderate. No way would I be ready to settle at 8.30, ridiculously early.

You shouldn't impose your bed time on everyone else, just because you're anxious. That is selfish.
I see they went to the lounge
If you were holidaying in a war zone I could understand you being anxious, but a nice area chosen by you, no
It's your DH and DCs holiday too

That’s a very high level of anxiety. It must make travelling extremely difficult.

I wouldn’t reject out of hand that you’re being too anxious, being like this will affect your child growing up. It’s worth considering whether you need to work on it.

No, you're not acting normal at all OP.

I agree. Why did you insist he stay with you, he could have gone with your ten year old and left you to rest or sleep.

Presumably you won't be going to bed so early every night of your holiday, I do 'get' that it sometimes takes a day or so to wind down. However, going out in the evening, especially to eat, is surely part of a good holiday and children enjoy that too;

If my husband asked me to stay in because he wanted to go to bed early I'd tell him to fuck off and get a grip of himself, irrespective of where in the world we were.

Based on this, I think you're massively unreasonable to demand he stays in your hotel room twiddling his thumbs whilst you sleep, and beyond weird to impose a 10pm curfew, and he should have told you to fuck off and get a grip of yourself.

Unless your husband and son have history you’re not revealing, you are totally unreasonable to expect them to stay in just because you want an early night. If your son was alone that would be different but he’s with your husband.

Sorry to say this OP but it’s not rational at all to be worried about your husband and son going to a hotel lounge on holiday. Going off the fact your husband wanted to “see what’s going on”, I’m assuming there’s a bar there, entertainment, a singer perhaps? The fact you think you’re being rational and it’s normal to be worried about this, is highly concerning.

Blimey- recently on a Greek island we didn't have dinner till around10pm on 3 nights.

Not to this level. He's an adult on holiday.

Relented. Christ.

Why do they have to stay in the room just because you want an early night ???!
Also relaxing together, going out, letting children stay up late is all part of holiday

What is the problem if he goes out? He’s an adult and perfectly capable of looking after his child I assume ?
what do you mean by strange city? Somewhere new to you or somewhere very dodgy? Holidays are about exploring new places too.
why the 10pm curfew in most warmer countries that’s when people are going out!!!

No, noooooo, you are not being rational.

He said they were going to the lounge in the hotel. Not prowling the back alleys of the local red light district.

Yes and very selfish, If you want to go to bed go, it doesn't mean everyone else has to.

You're being utterly ridiculous. They just want to explore and have a nice time- not many people, including children, are ready for bed at 8.30 on holiday. When my son was 10 we'd be out until at least 10.30.