to honestley wonder, why have children if you WANT to work fulltime and are not prepared to make ANY sacrifices?

[milkgoddessmakesthefinestmilk]

i don't mean parents that HAVE to work to provide.

i mean the ones that choose to for no other reason, other than they enjoy their job so much.
if you enjoy your job so much, thats great.
but what i really do not understand is why have children?
no one makes any of these parents have children, you can go though life without having children.

this is 100% genuine question, i just do not get it.

PW - and have you noticed the number of people who have a good reason (sports, music, especially sensitive character) why the son has private education and the daughter state. People used to think boys were more important because the girls would just get married. But the same pattern continues - the boys get the better education. That is purely anecdotal by the way.

Hang on though. I really do want to know about that mother with the shoping trolley.

Don't agree WWW. Her comments have gone way beyond the pale IMO.

And we're back - can't believe this is still going
I will be totally honest. I don't believe I could have had it all
I did think that when I had children I should give up certain things from my previous lifestyle
I gave up my career as I didn't want anyone else bringing up my child
I don't mind if others do, but I did not want to
I am being totally honest
We all have choices
My choice makes me no less intelligent or interesting to meet!! (Yes, I still have things to say)
I stayed at home for 2 years and now run my own business. I choose when I work and still have more days at home with my ds than not
I am happy. People who have gone to work a lot earlier than me (beacuse they chose to and not because thay had to) are happy too
And relax!!

nah c'mn you cannae beat a good ole scrap and the SAHM Vs Working is a gladiatorial classic, insults, stereotypes it has it all going on

Aaargh nkf, I'm one of those as well (bro went to St Pauls, I went to comp...)

PW - I think stay at home mothers don't even know they are doing it. That's what makes their attitude so revealing. They say things like "farm out" and "dump at nurseries" and "abandon" and "damage" and then wonder why a woman with a job and children takes umbrage.

Well, SAHMs as whores was fairly strong, I agree. But so is saying working mothers damage children.

@ policywonk: 'I defy you to find a single post by a SAHM on this thread that has been as crudely insulting as Xenia's.'

Try milkgoddesses' last thread for a start.

'personally i still think some people should just accept they, do not have the time or are willing to make any changes that are needed to be a really great parent.'

How bloody dare you! I love going to work, I love my dd and I AM a great parent. As I said in my previous post, the two are NOT mutually exclusive.

Yes, a WOTH P always 'dumps' her children on these threads. Pejorative words bandied aobut all over the place

Oh dear PW. What reason did your parents give?

internet arguments discussion is not for the faint hearted.inevitably things get hot, stuff get said, that's how it works

I just wish we could all agree on something. Rather than flinging stupid playground insults.

I had no idea I was such a bloody hippy till I started posting on here!

Don't forget leaving your children with 'strangers'

This thread is ridiculously silly. Do you people not realise that nothing actually matters in the grand scheme of things, it makes no difference what life choices any of us make, there is no purpose to life anyway, or any meaning, or any point.

We're just animals with a basic instinct to breed, not because we want to be good loving parents, but because we want to survive, so we pass on our genes.

Now ffs stop arguing about whether being a WOHM or SAHM is more 'good' or 'noble' or 'moral'. None of it matters.

Yes. Total strangers. And "bringing them up yourself."

Ph well that's all right then overmydead, we'll all just stop posting on anything then shall we if NOTHING matters?

this is not real.switch off and switch off

nkf - pleeease, can we say some SAHMs? I'm an SAHM and I have never, ever made the kind of generalisations that you refer to.

Izzy - sure, it's not great, but it does contain a crucial qualifier ('some'). Xenia says things like 'You do children a huge disservice by just being a housewife. It's a morally defective life choice. What are they going to say in later life? mummy did nothing.'

No qualifiers there - no attempt at nuance.

Congratulations to MilkGoddess. Got your 1000.

And if nothing matters then parenting sites are a bit pointless

but it does not matter just a bunch of women blethering

OverMyDeadBody - is it that time in the evening when you take a long slow dink of something and contemplate the lights and realise that you have jus stumbled on the key to everything.