Do most people have generally bad school memories?

[GRex]

Inspired by a range of commentary from colleagues and peers, it strikes me that a number seem to comment about bad experiences in primary, secondary, or both. Thankfully nothing major, but bad memories nonetheless.

There are not going to be absolutes here, or nobody could be positive, but thinking about school memories on the whole. I remember a mixed bag, but broadly positive especially in secondary school, wondered if that is unusual.

YABU - generally speaking, school was awful for me
YANBU - school was OK, mostly happy memories

I don’t have any bad memories about school.

I look back fondly on school, and while there were harder moments as usual for teens etc, I enjoyed school, especially gcse and a level years.

I was a 'swot' and while I was good at schoolwork and did well academically and wasn't bullied I was desperate to leave my rural community where I was considered uppity for wanting to do more with my life than be a farmers wife. University was a much happier time than school.

I absolutely LOVED school, LOVED IT.
Junior school kept me busy and engaged all day, which I found fulfilling and secondary school was absolutely brilliant. I met so many people and it was one huge social swirl.
I was a well behaved pupil though, lots of posters ‘whinging’ about schools are actually, in my opinion, the tedious, must moan about behaviour management, phone rule, uniform etc brigade.

No I found it quite lonely and confusing. My parents were emotionally shut off so I could never discuss anything at home. I didn't fit in with my peers as a tomboy with a disability. I took GCSE's that none of my mates did and got stuck with the 'in' crowds that I detested. I was just expected to shut up, get on with it and achieve the highest grades I could (they weren't anything special).

I was bullied from age 5- 16. Sixth form was much better, but my earlier experiences have definitely coloured my life and affected me.

I enjoyed some school activities and lessons, did not others. My main feeling is that I don't think I could have done much better if at all in exam results.

I hated school, and was relentlessly bullied. I did make some amazing friends from school and we are still friends now and I know they all hated it too.

None of us were from the popular crowd and it was quite a rough school.

Of course, some people will have loved school but I know many, many people who did not.

i suspect there’s a strong cross over with people who have bad memories of school with also posters starting threads about school gate mum cliques and being left out of adult friendship groups and feeling ignored at book club etc etc

Not here, once I left school and lived and worked in a community where I was 'normal' rather than a 'freak' I never had any social issues. I have a friend at work who is the same, she describes joining our company as finding her people.

Schools themselves - mostly fine as institutions. My complaints were almost exclusively about other pupils or a very small minority of teachers. And the food.

I enjoyed school. I was good academically and I had a couple of good friends. I liked learning stuff and I liked the routine, I found life after school quite difficult with the lack of routine and structure.

I was OK at school until I reached 10 yrs old when girls began getting bitchy (I was always at all-girls schools). Then I had a miserable time, on and off, for the rest of my schooling. Hated school. Was delighted to find Uni was a totally different experience and I really blossomed.

Same here. Like others, I was bullied at school and have very bad memories.

As soon as I left school I made wonderful friends at college, and now have a circle of lovely close friends and have made good friends at every place I've ever worked.

The issue was clearly not me as the people who bullied me now appear to be rather miserable going off their social media posts.

Endured primary school (I felt far too young at four and just wanted my mum) and that sense of displacement carried through, really.

Loved senior school. The odd horrible moment, but mostly a lot of fun.

Edited, because I was glad to leave though in Yr 11 and continue my education elsewhere. It was quite small town and I really wanted city life and to be amongst broader minds.

For most of the time I had a good experience. I found it easy to make friends and was into sports and music. Then it crashed around me. I was a bit of a late bloomer and suddenly my friends were into dating, sex, partying and drinking. These were things I was so far away from because of a strict upbringing. I became an oddball not being into this. I was isolated and sometimes picked on. Nothing as bad as some stories are. But this left a sour taste in my mouth when I think of the last year. All other years were pretty good.

Nope miserable time especially in high school. I hated it.

can not think of a single happy memory there. Was relieved to leave.

funnily enough I work in a high school now and love it 😂

I was fairly academically capable, but didn't fit in much with other kids. So I liked school itself, but there were some nasty instances of bullying which absolutely left some bad memories, and I don't have any close friends from that time.

I loved school and have amazing memories of primary and secondary school ( not sure how much of this is looking back with rose tinted glasses). Home life wasn’t great for me and I loved the social aspect of school but I wasn’t very academic. I used to really look forward to going back after holidays. I also wasn’t one of the ‘cool kids’, but I never really had any issues luckily otherwise I’m sure I’d feel differently.

Primary was OK but secondary a living nightmare. Undiagnosed ADHD (only diagnosed in my early 40s), struggles with friendship groups etc. Ended up with an anxiety based eating disorder at 14 that stayed with me my whole life. Fell in with the bitchy popular crowd but never fitted in. Got good GCSEs due to the fact I was fairly intelligent but the while thing scarred me and 6th form + Uni were a car crash. Left me with lifelong habit of burning bridges.

Loved it until I was around 7 then had some really awful teachers till 11. Struggled massively with the transition to secondary but got to about 14/5 and it just changed! Loved it from then and was really sad to leave at 18. Sixth form was amazing and have fantastic memories of that time.

My overriding memory of school was that I laughed a lot, proper laughing !

There were ups and downs as with everything else, but broadly I absolutely loved my time at school - liberal, slightly hippyish ‘80s primary (lots of ‘topics’ and plenty of space for sport, music and drama), and then a super-selective grammar which suited me perfectly as a swotty, bookish kid. Found lots of like-minded friends and hardly encountered any behaviour issues.

It did give me quite a shock when I started teaching myself and I discovered that most schools weren’t like mine! And I’m probably now a bit over-invested in DD’s education, as I want to recreate what I had for her, but the system is now so different and there are so many more issues being dealt with by schools nowadays.

I loved school I stayed on in the VI form (1987) because I couldn’t bear the thought of leaving.

Yes, I found @medik7 's post quite bitchy and suspect she might be the kind of person who has contributed to some people's bad school memories...

I had a tough time at school, I was bullied and excluded from my primary school friend group at 13 (tricky age). I generally got on fine with everyone else, but I never managed to 'find my tribe'. Same with university, I live in an area where most live at home for uni so although I had friends, it felt like an extension of school as I was going home to my mum's for dinner most nights. Different story once I got into the workplace and I've absolutely thrived as an adult. School days were absolutely NOT the best days of my life.