Family holiday drama

[familydrama1]

So we are due to go on holiday next year with family. We invited my parents, they booked their own room - they then invited my nephew (who is 17). My brother didn't pay for my nephew or even offer to pay for their place.

I found out I was pregnant recently and can't book the baby's space until they are born. Also there will be no spaces as, the baby is due 4 months before the holiday. Anyone we trust with our child will be on that holiday. We need to take my nephew off the booking and change it to the baby when they are born.

AIBU to take my nephew off the booking (I have spoken to my parents about this and they understand) but I know my brother won't be happy and it will cause drama. Or should just not go and lose thousands 😣

Need an outside perspective pleaseeee

If op doesn’t have a Dc in the parents cabin she shouldn’t pay any of it. If the parents then don’t want to go they can cancel ( it will vacate a cabin for op to pay for). It’s not op ‘s responsibility to pay for Dn if they asked him. But my hunch is they will reimburse op.

Surely the solution is that you remove your child from your parents room and ask for the 50% room cost back. They can then ask your brother for it. Then you book 2 rooms and split the kids up between you and your husband.

Which presumably is what they would have had to do to accommodate their existing 3 children, had these helpful extra adults not been going. So, actually, by going and taking DN, GPs have saved OP half the cost of a room.

So the answer is to book the two rooms, they should/would have booked anyway. Plus the room GPs have booked.

Then they can either be occupied by either:

• one parent plus a child and baby, other parent plus 2 children, GPs and DN
• or if everyone prefers, OP and DH plus baby and a child, DN (or DN and GF) GPs (or GM) plus other 2 children

That's what I meant, sorry if not clear. The 50% she paid she shouldn't have, I suggested the GP and Brother (because if nephew) split that, reimbursing OP and she books another full room....

Yes, you put it more eloquently than me! Lol

Couldn't you book another room and your husband or father could stay in it with your nephew then one of your children could stay with your mother and the baby could be with you. .if your parents have already paid for your nephew won't they lose that money if he doesn't come?

Surely the big Q really is how old will the baby be at the time of the cruise? somewhere between 4 - 6 months old? if under 6 months baby won't be accepted as a passenger and OP won't be able to fib about it because they will need ID for the baby too, including DOB? - Please tell me people aren't able to take undocumented children on cruises that dock in foreign countries?

Hi op. Could you not book a room and move your husband to the room himself. And then add the baby to that room when they are born?

Loads, if not most, cabins on a cruise ship are 2 berth. They simply won't let you add a 3rd person even if that person's a baby.

Going on a cruise with a baby sounds like hell on earth. God help the other passengers.

I'm sailing Europe with Carnival next year and their cruises are filling up fast. Here's one example (prices in AUD. If OP wanted to grab that cheapest suite she'd have to pay a minimum of 2 x that fare).

Sorry I don't really know about cruises but it does sound tricky, despite the fact sounds like underlying resentment with your brother I guess is another story. Is there possibility of booking a suite and using this to accommodate more than 4 people then cancelling one of the smaller rooms?

If your nephew is 17 now, will he be 18 at the time of the cruise and therefore an adult who can have the baby in his room?

Then your DH can have your existing kids in his room, your parents can have DN in their room
and you and baby can have the DN’s room?

I don't agree with most of the people on here. You half paid for a room with your parents. Room has a capacity of 4 you were only using 1 spot. It wasn't up to your parents to decide to use your extra space and invite your nephew. They've put someone in your space, that you paid for, that it turns out you now need.

I think explaining to the nephew that as you're pregnant and will need the space he can't go is fine. I would have understood that at that age. He'd not 6 and having an ice cream taken off him.

But to take that away from the Nephew when he has done no wrong, or even if he would be understanding, he didn't invite himself, he got invited, he didn'ttell her to fall pregnant. He may not be a 6 year old having an ice cream taken from him, but he's 17, and I would of jumped at the chance at that age to go along if it was offered to me and be really excited, even more so if I'd never of experienced a cruise before!
That's really not fair on him!

But she also said that he parents were paying for her nephew.

So she either paid half which she has stated or she paid a 1/4 and the grandparents paid 3/4 which she has also stated.

Why are you singling out and requesting your Nephew doesnt go? As you say - there are other family members going from your Husbands side too.

You are the one that is pregnant and therefore maybe you or your husband drop out.

Also - maybe your parents don't want little kids in their room (might not be a fun holiday for them). A 17 year old is very different to a kid under 12. They also might really enjoy his company and he is also paid for his share and place.

Yup, it's still going and with no new info...
Feel like we've been in a timewarp today 😶
And may I just say Boggins, you've been most entertaining 😁

Fucking hell, the vultures are out this evening. Considering the majority of them seem to have the comprehension level of a 5 yr old, I'd ignore most of them.

OP, I can appreciate you are in a difficult position. But seeing as you have technically paid for your family already I would add baby. If parents or your DB want to pay to include nephew they can. Absolutely shocked people are suggesting you are you DH miss out or cancel and lose money for the holiday you paid for.

If not, I think at 17 DN is able to understand the situation and appreciate that it is not personal.

If your parents invited your nephew your brother no doubt assumed they would pay for him, that is the usual way.

It sounds as though you are all going to be fairly cramped, sharing rooms, etc. It doesn't sound like a very comfortable holiday and hardly suitable for a six month old baby.

It would be out of order to kick your nephew off the holiday. Although you could ask him if actually wants to go. Most 17 year olds wouldn't be that bothered.

The grandparents DID pay for the nephew - it’s in one of OP’s updates (which I assume you read, as you are casting aspersions on other posters’ comprehension)

OP said:

No one asked if he could come, and my parents paid for him.

Except the OP first stated she only paid for her daughter in parent's room. She has also stated repeatedly that her parents are paying for her nephew. She only tried changing the story to her paying half when people pointed out she didn't own her nephew's place.

She would also need the second room/larger more expensive cabin anyway if her parents weren't there because the family of 5 (soon to be 6) wouldn't fit in the 4 person room she booked. Her parents have actually subsidised her holiday.

The OP also doesn't need to cancel, she can just book the second room like she would have done if her parents weren't there. Because, despite first claiming there is nothing left, she has since said there are rooms still available.

Perhaps work on your own comprehension skills before slating others.

So it shocks you that people are suggesting she or DH miss out, cancel, whatever..
But you're not shocked that she's suggesting to kick DN off the trip and miss out? That he was invited to? And the parents paid for him to go along? And when none of this is his causing/problem?